Considering exchanging my setting…would like some advice.

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

Depends. Do you want to keep revisiting the jeweler for repairs every month for the lifetime of your ownership? 4 stones in 2 months would definitely make me change my setting. I don’t have that much time to spend at the jeweler, thanks.

Why not let him pick out a new setting on his own, with the stipulation that it not be pave (since this local jeweler doesn’t do pave very well/securely)? You will still have something he chose on his own, and it will have the durability you want.

Post # 5
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

@ButterflyButterfly:  That’s understandable. Would he feel more comfortable if you sent him photos of non-pave rings that you like? Or what if he took your best friend/sister/mother… anyone who knows your style well… with him to go shopping for your new setting?

Mr. Lk decided that he wanted me to choose mine because that is what worked for us. But before he made that decision, I offered up the idea of taking my SIL shopping with him. She and I have the same taste in clothing and jewelry, so I know she would have been a huge help to him if he decided to shop without me.

Post # 6
Member
5483 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@ButterflyButterfly:  Yep. I would definitely change it so I didnt have to worry constantly about stones falling out! Your FI will get over it; he didnt know he was choosing something high mainteance! Even with pave rings though … 4 stones in 2 months sounds excessive. I would exchange it for sure. Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
6887 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

@ButterflyButterfly:  Definitely change it. I had a ring that did that and I was paranoid all the time. I was even paranoid when I got my new ring, but it’s been a few months now with no incidents and it feels wonderful to not be worrying about my ring constantly! I assume you’ll keep the same center stone, so at least it’s the original stone he proposed with. Also, maybe you could have another jeweler replicate your first setting, just hand make it to be more sturdy? That’s basically what we did when mine kept dropping stones. It was cool to be able to redesign my ring the way I wanted it. I kept some features of the old design but made a lot of improvements 🙂 Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Losing a stone is one of the main things that made me go from pave halo set to my solitaire and yes…my new wedding band does have pave but still it is not nearly as many stones to worry about as my former set was. I would do the same if I were you. Sentimental I get but if you keep losing stones and have to have it at the jeweler all of the time that is no good.

On a side note, ultrasonic cleaners are the enemy of pave.

Post # 10
Member
3622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

Well pave settings should really not be sized much, nor should they ever go in an unltrasonic.  So those loses are not surprising to me, but I agree the jeweler should have been forthcoming about that information.  But you have to consider if pave is for you or not.  It does require extra care, so if you are not prepared to baby your ring, I would exchange it.  And maybe picking it out together will make you sentimantal to that one too?

Post # 11
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@ButterflyButterfly:  I’m SO low maitenance that I went with a bezel set LOL– I wouldn’t want to deal with the loss of stones- even if it was covered by the jewler.  It means my ring has to spend time away from my finger, and that’t not what I like!

Even though it might just be YOUR setting, I think you’ll feel better if you get a new type of setting!

Post # 12
Member
525 posts
Busy bee

I have really been loving bezel settings more and more! That may be a great option for you because it is very secure. It also is (in my opinion) still a pretty unique style. I had a custom made engraved ring that has tiny daisies that sometimes remind me of pave – I purposely avoided tiny stones because I had seen some problems listed here and the engravings were sort of fun and sparkly. 

Post # 13
Member
8708 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’d have him choose the setting. He did a good job the first time (With unfortunate unforseen side effects), so if you think he’ll pick something out that you’ll love, I’d do it.

Or you can go the custom built route. I completely designed my engagement and wedding ring. I made a diagram of what I wanted, the thickness I wanted, the types of metal, all the way down to the intricate design around the diamond. It wasn’t very expensive to have both custom made, either.

Post # 15
Member
6887 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

@ButterflyButterfly:  Glad to hear!! I did the same thing – added the prong set. Although there is more metal it still manages to look more delicate. It really just depends on the jeweler I think. Good luck, the wait is hard!!! 

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