Post # 1
Ok, I’m jumping the gun here because AF hasn’t showed up this month quite yet, but I have a temp drop to coverline and a stark white BFN today at 10DPO with some pre-AF spotting… but I’m such a planner/controller/whatever, that I just can’t stop my brain from trying to plan ahead for every scenario… bleh!
Anyway, DH and I are going to TTC one more cycle for sure, but if it doesn’t happen, then there is a decision to be made… continue to TTC or put it on hold for a few months?? Here’s why:
In June we are taking a trip to Europe – we will be tour leaders/chaperones for a group of 15 students (there will also be 3 other chaperones with us) for a 9-10 day trip.
If I get pregnant next month (actually pregnant in late February but test early March), I would be about 3.5 months along for the trip – so somewhat “safely” into second trimester. If it doesn’t happen, then if we try throughout the following cycles, I’d be anywhere from 0-2.5 months along for the trip. Then I might have a higher chance of morning sickness and miscarriage. As much as it would suck, I think I could put up with (or get a prescription for) morning sickness on the trip, but I can’t imagine what miscarrying on a plane 7 hours away from a destination would be like, or miscarrying in a foreign country when we have a really fast-paced itinerary…
If it matters, I’m 29 and DH is 31. So anyway, I guess I’ve probably answered my own question, but want to know – what would you do?
Continue trying or put it on hold?
Post # 3
I’d keep trying. There are no guarantees (either that you would get pregnant, or that you have morning sickness). I am almost out of my first trimester and would have felt fine on a trip to Europe.
Post # 4
I would keep trying for sure. There are no guarantees in life and especially in TTC/pregnancy! You may not even get pregnant, or you might be pregnant with no symptoms.
Post # 5
@kate02121: it looks like we’re sharing a brain today!
Post # 6
@E_Lynne615: I’d keep trying, for the reasons stated above, plus in the event that you were feeling really crappy, could it be possible to find a last-minute replacement to chaperone the trip?
Post # 7
@E_Lynne615: There are no guarantees with morning sickness. I was ok once I ate something every couple of days. Some are fine, some are not. Regarding mc, if it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen. This won’t bring it on. Also, since it’s Europe, there will be good hospitals etc if the worst happened. However, having a mc is not nice. Only you can decide if it’s worth taking the risk of that happening away from home. From someone who’s been TTC just shy of a year, I say go for it. You may regret it later.
Post # 8
@kenziemt: It would be possible, but would really suck.. 🙁 DH said that he then wouldn’t want to go on the trip without me and leave me miserable at home, so they’d have to find another chaperone to replace him too. Plus I’m the lead teacher, the others don’t speak the language or have any experience with this sort of travel.
@phoebephoebo: @terpalum10: @kate02121: You ladies all make some good points! I have to admit, I was expecting everyone to be like, No – you should really put it on hold… and I got some goosebumps reading the responses to keep trying!
Hopefully it doesn’t come down to this and I get my BFP next month (or this month if a miracle happens…) – but I love the input/advice! Keep it coming!
Post # 9
I would hold off. I wanted to DIE for most of the first trimester! So if you’re looking forward to this trip, I would hold off for the next couple of moths and start trying again whatever month the trip is in!
Post # 10
@E_Lynne615: Honestly, there is always going to be something to plan around. If you keep holding off for those reasons, you’ll never TTC. I would keep trying in your case and deal with these things as they come up. You may not be as sick as you think in the first trimester. I was expecting to be a miserable ball of crap, and I had nothing (I actually had a loss of symptoms). Itr just depends.
Fingers crossed 🙂
Post # 11
I would say hold off, but not because of morning sickness. I am 14 weeks, and morning sickness you can deal with. That is not the reason I would say wait.
Last summer, I took 21 high school freshman on a 9 day trip to England. We were up and moving, with an OBSCENE amount of walking, from 7am until after bed checks at 10pm. With how tired most people are during the first trimester, and how much moving/walking/running around there was on the trip, I know I wouldn’t have been able to do it.
Second, I miscarried overseas. I found out the day before I left for my DW that my pregnancy wasn’t viable. I started bleeding on the plane to London the next night. Was it manageable? yes, but it was because 1) I, luckily, wasn’t in much pain, just really heavy bleeding and 2) I could take things at my own pace. I could rest, go tot he restroom, etc, whenever I needed to. As the lead chaperone on a trip of this kind, you won’t have that luxury. You’ll have to get on the bus and go to the next city no matter how crappy you are feeling. I had the chance to deal with my feelings of losing the baby on my own time, with my DH and mom there for me. You’d be dealing with teenagers and likely not wanting to tell them what happened.
So things to think about. Morning sickness is dealable, but there are other things to consider.
Post # 12
I would hold off. Like you, I’d be so scared to be so far away from home should anything happen. You’re not at an age where every little month counts, and if you’re going to get pregnant, it will happen even if you wait. If I was you, I’d take it not happening before my trip as a sign.
Post # 13
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@E_Lynne615: I wouldn’t worry too much about miscarriage but I had hyperemesis gravidarum when I was pregnant. Essentially it’s the worst morning sickness you can have. I ended up in the ER getting IV fluids because I was so dehydrated from vomiting.
We are planning a trip to Europe this year for a 2 week vacation and a trip to the UK next year for a wedding. We decided to hold off TTC again until after the two week trip. we are also trying to time our TTC so I would be in my second trimester during the UK trip next year. I just don’t want to be stuck on an airplane for 9+ hours with morning sickness; just the thought of puking in an airplane bathroom grosses me out.
Post # 14
@terpalum10: Haha close to word for word!
Post # 15
@E_Lynne615: I am in a very similar situation with you, I’m leading a trip to France with a group of students in April. My husband and I just decided that we would wait until after the trip to TTC, not really because of fears of miscarriage, but you just don’t know how your body will react. I wouldn’t want to be dragging myself around if I am feeling super exhausted or not be able to eat whatever I want (say no to French cheese?) and perhaps most importantly some wine (our students stay with a family for part of the trip so we are kind of free to relax a bit more during that time!).
However, we haven’t started trying yet and if the trip wasn’t happening we probably wouldn’t be starting until then anyway (ETA: I think though we might be NTNP at this point if not for the trip). But anyway, I still think I would wait. No, going on the trip isn’t going to make you miscarry, but if you did I think it would be really tough to have to face that around your students. But more importantly and likely is that you just might not feel great.
ETA: Saw your update that you’re the trip leader. I think if that’s the case then you should definitely hold off just for the next couple months. I know you don’t want to put your life plans on hold, but you made a commitment to the trip and I think it’s important you not put yourself in a position to not be able to go.
Post # 16
I would keep trying! But I am hoping you get your BFP in your next cycle so you wont even have to worry about it 🙂