(Closed) Could I consider myself engaged?? – Arranged Marriage

posted 5 years ago in Muslim
Post # 3
Member
4734 posts
Honey bee

Engaged, betrothed, promised to wed… I think, as long as there isn’t a religious or cultural word that you’re expected to use, then you can pick whatever you’re most comfortable with. 

Post # 4
Member
2336 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I think it depends on what you want. Would you like to be engaged? Or would you like to get to know your husband-to-be first? Even though you are Muslim, would you like him to give you an engagement ring?

If I were in your shoes, I suppose I’d start calling myself ‘engaged’ when I started physically planning the wedding.

Post # 5
Member
344 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

You’re ‘betrothed’.

When you start planning for the wedding (booking venues, looking for dresses, etc), I’d say that you are engaged.

Post # 6
Member
485 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Yes.  I have a friend who has an arranged marriage (although they are Hindu / Indian).  She called herself “betrothed” rather than engaged.

 

Who plans the wedding ceremony?  Is that you and your FH?  Or your parents?  I would hope that you will get to interact with this gentleman during the “betrothal” so that you get to know him!

Good Luck!

Post # 7
Member
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I think you could call yourself engaged if you feel comfortable with that term! It might be easier for other people to understand than explaining “bethrothed,” even though that might be a more technically correct term for your current situation. Engaged will probably be clearer and more off-putting to potential suitors you might meet in college than the term bethrothed, if you are ever in a situation where you have to turn down a date!

Post # 10
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@chynaaGH:  I’m bringing the thread back haha! Betrothed is such a great word…I used it when referring to my fiance before we were planning our wedding. I consider you engaged if you want me to πŸ™‚ 

Post # 11
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

in my country they call that a kind of engagment

but there must be a ring to be officially engaged , some people getengaged for years on that wedding promise and just 2 rings , they get to know each other through these year.

I think you should call your self engaged and tell your friend an so when you wear the ring.

congrats dear πŸ™‚

Post # 12
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I would say you’re engaged but it’s not official..I’m Muslim too and I’m with someone who I spend a lot of time with and he is invited to all the family events etc, but I don’t want to say I’m engaged until I have the ring and am actually planning the wedding just because around here, when you say you’re engaged people expect a wedding within a year. To nonmuslims I just say say my boyfriend or the guy I’m with and to muslims he’s just the guy I’m gonna marry lol hope that helps

Post # 13
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Coming from someone who was free to make my own (sometimes very poor) decisions on who to date, etc, I’d say call him whatever you’re comfortable with.  When I hear ‘engaged’ I expect that a wedding is in the works.  Call him your friend, boyfriend, the guy you’re with, say you’re in a relationship, you’re committed, or it’s none of thier business!  To my mother he’d be your “friend” until you had a ring on your finger and maybe until you actually said vows.  πŸ™‚ 

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