Could you financially do it on your own?

posted 3 years ago in Parenting
Post # 3
Member
6747 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Yes, I could.  But I say that based on not just my salary, but on the very large life insurance policy that DH has.  It is enough to pay off the house, both cars and still have a good deal of money left over.  I would still need to work, but I would not be scrambling to pay the mortgage etc.

Post # 4
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I was a single parent when I met Mr. LK, so I know I would have no problem doing it all on my own. 🙂 Even adding a 2nd child would not be an issue. Things would obviously change. If it were me and 2 kids I would trade this big house on 5 acres for a townhome, just because I couldn’t maintain all of this on my own. But otherwise we would continue with our current lifestyle.

Post # 5
Member
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I definitely couldn’t stay in the house we have and save for retirement and vacations like we do now.  But with a smaller rent, a little less retirement saving (we max 401k and Roths now), and help from my parents in place of day care, I’d manage ok and still be pretty comfortable I think.  My 2013 car is paid off and I have no loans.  We make the same amount now and have done things so that if we HAD to, we could get by on one income.

Post # 6
Member
2400 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

With smaller rent…sure I could. I am the breadwinner for our family right now, DH makes half of what I do. I could support myself and 2 kids. It would be tight but it would work.

Post # 7
Member
4587 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

No. I don’t have a college degree and have only worked retail. I would have to move back in with my parents and juggle my own work schedule with my mother’s because I could never afford daycare.

 

Post # 8
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

No.

In no way would I be able to take care of our 3 kids on my own. I never went to college and only got a GED when I moved to the states because my diploma from my country was no good – even though I actually have an hydraulic engineering degree back home, it meant nothing over here.

So with no education I’d be able to do very little as far as jobs go. That would mean making minimum wage. No way could I pay for child care for 3 kids. That alone would take more than I would make. I’d be completely screwed and would have to rely on family members. Which really is only my FI’s family as mine lives in Europe. 

I would probably have to move back to my country and live with my dad forever.

So that scares the crap out of me. I really can’t see myself going to college now, but I am hoping in 4 years when the youngest goes to kindergarten I can go back to school and get a degree and hopefuly get a job that would mean I can take care of my kids in case something happened.

Post # 9
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@aliciapdx:  Yes, I could. I believe strongly in financial independence. It is easier (of course) with my FI, but I could do it on my own if need be.

Post # 10
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

also, the idea of going back to school scares me because English is my third language. I know it’s not bad, it’s actually pretty decent but when it comes to technical terms I am lost. I don’t even know the proper terms for math equations and such so that would be like learning everything from start. And then there’s English itself which I taught myself so I have no idea about that. I can speak it and type it but that’s about it.

 

Post # 11
Member
3948 posts
Honey bee

My mom found herself in this sitation when my dad passed away suddenly. She had been a stay at home mom our whole lives but suddenly became a widow with 3 children under 10 years old.
The reality is that our lifestyle did change. She did not have a degree and had been out of the workforce for 10+ years. Its nearly 20 years later and it’s still a struggle for her. It’s not fair and definetly not the life she dreamed of or planned on. With that said, you make it work. She kept a roof over our heads, food on the table, and clothes in the closet. It wasnt easy for her or us but made us into the people we are today. She is also the strongest person that I know.

 

Post # 12
Member
5883 posts
Bee Keeper

I could and did for many years, all on my own. People somehow find their inner strength and just make it work.

Post # 13
Member
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I was a single parent to my daughter since she was 7.  After her dad and I split up he moved out of state.  I worked as a legal assistant and got modest child support.  Other than the child support, her dad did not help out financially, including braces, camp, medical care (surgery, at one point), computers, tutors, clothes, musical instruments, etc. 

It is doable, but I certainly wouldn’t *choose* to be a single parent. 

Post # 14
Member
29 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I couldn’t make it on my own in the town that I live in if I lived the life I’m acustomed to. My husband makes about 3 times as much as I do. If he died, like someone else said, his life insurance would pay the hosue off. So, that would help tremendously. And I could probably get by, but I would have to drastically change my lifestyle. I would probably move back to my hometown where the cost of living is much much less also. It would be hard, but doable. I would just have to really adjust.

Post # 15
Member
1563 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Not on my salary. But if I had to, I’d make it work as you do with everything in life that gets thrown at you. But this reminds me to go home and hug my husband.

Post # 16
Member
5460 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yes.  I would have to downsize significantly.  If I absolutely NEEDED to, I could rent a small 1-2 bedroom apartment or buy a smaller house which would free up enough disposable income to make ends meet.  If my car crapped out or some other unforseen major expense popped up it would be much harder on me than it would be now.

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