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Here's an interesting article in the NYT about cousins marrying.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/26/garden/26cousins.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1
thank you daydream! i've been incredibly absent-minded today!!! ã…
Hmm. Interesting. I totally get the genetics and on the whole I agree. But I must admit that there's still this strong part of me going "Yeeeeee. No way!"
Interesting article. I have a really close knit family, so I feel like my first cousins are almost like extra siblings. The thought of even thinking of my cousins in that way is really strange to me.
That honestly made me feel a little sick.
When we went to get our marriage license, they asked us if we were cousins. We aren't, but apparently they have to ask. It's legal here, but they have to know so they can list it.
I couldn't do it. Cousins are family, man...genetically and emotionally. It's your uncle or aunt's kid...Big thumbs down to me. There was a story awhile back about step-siblings marrying and I felt the same about that--no genetic similiarity, but still. It's just.......it's a big world out there, can't you find someone else?! lol. I"m with the writer, it grosses me out a little bit. I keep imagining my brother hitting on my little cousin (who's like, 18) and it weirds me out!
No to sound mean, but I thought when first cousins had kids there's the potential for mutant kids???
I don't think step-siblings are that bad. i mean, it's a little weird yeah, but not a dealbreaker. Cousins - I can't get behind that.
My mom dated her second cousin when she was like 14. All they did was hold hands. He got his own tv show in 1977. I think it ended up being pretty failboat.:p
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0624727/
woahhhhhhhhhhh. Yeah, like Jessie516, my family is really close so it grosses me out completely. It would be like wanting to be with your sibling. No thanks.
Umm... we can let FIRST COUSINS marry but we can't let gay people? WTF? That's so gross.
In some cultures this is the norm, though it seems pretty out of the typical family experience for here. I know that for some genetic disorders we see, we sometimes refer to the family wreath of families with consanguinity instead of the family tree. It seems after reading the article that this is still a pretty rare thing in the US and continues to have a lot of stigma attached.
I don't think it is all that strange ... there's lots of people who have been friends since they were small and then got married. And there are cousins who barely knew each other growing up...and then got married. Just because you are blood relations doesn't necessarily mean that your families were even close...and if they are....why is it massively different from marrying your mum's best friends' child you grew up with?
My first inclination is "ew"...but maybe there are situations that are acceptable? I personallly couldn't do it...I don't know...all I can think is yikes...
Yeah, I think it's a little disturbing, but I don't know, I have never been in love with my cousin, lol. And I love the cusband, haha.
There's ever more weird than tha man marrying the virtual girlfriend! Wow that's just ...... a big no no if u ask me.
OK, I'm gonna be totally close-minded on this one - THAT is freaking DISGUSTING.
Um, yeah. Pretty sure that is illegal where I'm from, and gross! There is no way I could do that!
First-cousin marriage is legal where I live! Here's a map of U.S. laws: http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2009/11/25/garden/26cousins-map.html
Apparently the U.S. is one of the few countries in the world that still mostly prohibits first-cousin marriage. New studies have shown that the genetic dangers to cousin-cousin offspring are only a few percentage points higher than for non-cousin children. I think the dangers of consanguinity are overstated but the ick factor is too much for most people. I certainly wouldn't do it...but then again I have only girl cousins! Maybe if you didn't know the cousin growing up it would be less weird.
I have no opinion on this, I guess love is love. Seriously, to each their own. But does anyone else find it weird that gay people can't get married, but marrying family is no problem....in most states?
jus sayin
I agree with zippy & sulli... It's legal in 1/2 the states for first cousins to get married, but it's illegal for homosexuals to get married? Incredible.
Her "cusband"... wow! That is beyond disturbing!
GROSS!!! I'm not even close with any of my cousins, and that is just not right. I mean, that my mom's nephew!! That's like my daughter (if I have one) hooking up with one of my brother's sons. Oh, no way.
Why oh why can't we have coherent national policies on marriage?
On topic: I don't really care if cousins get married. It strikes me as a bit odd at first, but then I realize that there's really no reason for me to care.
Cousins marrying seems weird to me, but it's not that weird in a lot of the world. I actually have some distant relatives that have married their first cousins... it's actually moderately common in places with arranged marriages.
"They are somewhat open about being cousins, and have told some friends, Ms. Spring-Winters said, but they don’t tell everyone."
Except the NY Times? This amuses me.
I am not going to lie as I am reading this article I find myself thinking is this social stigma that I am succumbing to or something inherently wrong? I don't know the answer. I have some first cousins I am very close to (even if they are across the world) because of that (they are like someone else said) they are another set of siblings to me. Would be any different from say guy friends whom I am really close to that I do see as a brother? Then the only other "real" objection would be children defect. But if that is at a low...? I don't know. Part of me still thinks "Eik!"
I so over thinking this
I really really don't get it. I don't want to say to my children, 'kids sorry you have only one set of great grandparents because we are first cousins!'
@MissAB, I believe they would still have 3 sets of great- grandparents, instead of 4. For example you have, presumably, 2 sets of grandparents, your mom's parents and your dad's. If you marry your first cousin, son of your dad's brother let's say, on your dad's side, your children would have your paternal grandparents as great grandparents, but they'd also have your mom's parents as another set, and your husband's mother's parents as another. Make sense?
I think initially it's weird to accept cousin couples because our country has been told there are potential birth defects if these relationships produce offspring. However, that is proving to be an extremely slight risk. It would be one thing if your family is close and you grow up as such, but otherwise, I think it actually isn't all that bad. Weird, but not bad.
even though I could never think of my male cousins that way...ICK...I know over a hundred years ago this was more common and think I even have some of this way back in my family tree....read some old novels, and the happy ending might just be marrying the cousin! That way, you can live on family land, etc.
I actually know a seriously dating couple who are first cousins and are really struggling with what to do because they have no family support and it's illegal for them to marry. It seems really awkward to me, but it's really different when you know someone who's fallen in love with someone who happens to be related to them. (although they've known they were cousins all along) They get a lot of grief!
A couple hundred years ago it was common for *siblings* to marry - for the purposes of monarchies (royal dynasties), oligarchies, etc.! *shudder*
When I stop to think about it the idea doesn't freak me out as much as I thought it would. Or rather, it does, but I don't have a logical reason for it to do so. Like Bamm pointed out, how is it different than marrying your childhood sweetheart that you grew up with? I know I was closer to my neighbors growing up than my cousins and yet we tend to think of this as one of the sweetest stories. Same goes for step-siblings. Depending on how old they were when the families merged, I don't see any reason why they couldn't be together if they're willing to deal with the awkwardness that will undoubtably ensue.
Then again, I don't have any male cousins so that's hard for me to imagine!
@ery: Haha, yeah you're right. I'm kind of dumb haha.
I still could never imagine marrying my cousins!
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