Post # 1
I am engaged and planning my own wedding (which I love doing, but haven’t had a lot of time for lately). My coworker got engaged after me and is getting married before me. She is constantly talking about/planning her wedding at work. She invited a few of us from work, and originally said she was inviting our significant others too. Now she’s said that she is not inviting our significant others, and has asked 3 of us to be her wedding coordinators. I am an event planner for work, which is such a stressful job, and I never get to sit back and enjoy an event. Now, outside of work, knowing that I’m stressed and also planning my OWN wedding, she’s expecting me to help plan hers and run around all day to set up and keep her wedding on track. The thought of that stresses me out so much that I don’t want to go, but I don’t want to leave my other friends there with more work to do. What should I do?
Post # 2
Kukla: Just say no. Tell her you were looking forward to being able to relax and enjoy her wedding and are not prepared to work on your day off
Post # 3
Definitely say no to being a coordinator, and just decline the invite if you think it will make work awkward.
Post # 4
Just say no. This lady is your co-worker – is she even your friend??
Post # 5
Agree, just say no. After all, you are going to be so busy arranging your own wedding details!
Post # 6
I don’t see what the big deal is? If it is something you don’t want to do be the adult that you are and say no. If your other colleagues can’t say no then that is their problem. Stop creating stress for yourself.
Post # 7
tell her no, unless she is paying you. and why wouldn’t your SO be invited. you are engaged to each other. i would probably decline this invitation. she really doesn’t sound like a friend.
Post # 8
j_jaye: I was thinking the same thing. OP, you’re stressing yourself out here. We are all capable of saying no and you need to do that here and ASAP.
Post # 9
Kukla: Are you actually friends with this person? If not, sounds like she is just trying to take advantage of you and get services for free. You’re not really “invited” if you’re working. It’s also rude to exclude the person you’re engaged to.
You don’t want to go, so don’t. That’s what I would do.
Post # 10
Kukla: You should tell her no.
What your other co-workers choose to do is up to them and not your responsibility. It is incredibly rude for her to ask you to be an unpaid wedding coordinator and day laborer.
Either tell her you will be unable to attend or help or tell her you would prefer to attend as a guest.
She is the one being out-of-line. Don’t let her make you feel awkward or guilty.
Post # 11
Agree with PPs. Tell her no, you are too busy planning your OWN wedding to plan hers/coordinate for her. The fact that she is not inviting spouses/SO’s even further shows that she is trying to take advantage of the situation.