Post # 1
Awkward turtle. So FI and I are having a smallish (80-90, 40 of whom are my huge family) wedding with immediate family and a few close friends. I am careful not to post lots about the wedding on social media or to bring it up to people I haven’t invited. I NEVER talk about my wedding at work.
Anyway, I’m a teacher, and the last day of school this year my department chair stopped me in the hall and said, “We’re all (the dept.) so excited about your wedding…we better be invited!” in a joking-but-not voice. I was super flustered because I truly am not friends with these people and they only know I’m engaged b/c they asked about the ring and date.
I should have just let her down easy right then but I was so thrown off that I sort of giggled and said “we’re excited too” and sped off. Now I have to deal with the fact that I’ve got 5-10 people who definitely did not get StDs but are “super excited” for my wedding.
What should I say?
Post # 3
When they don’t get invitations, they will figure it out.
Be prepared to tell them “We are having a small wedding and are unable to include everyone we would love to have with us. We you are sure you will inderstand.” Do not make any excuses about budget etc as there will always be those people who offer to pay for their meal.
Post # 4
@bluestockingbride: My coworkers kind of did the same thing. First I told them “well, if I invite a couple of you then I kind of feel obligated to invite ALL of my coworkers and that’s just not feasable” then when they persisted (In the kind of joking/not so joking sense) I just told them NO. There’s not room. Sorry I’m not sorry.
Post # 5
My coworkers aren’t doing this, thank god. Though my associate publisher has joked that he’s going to crash the wedding, but I know he’s only joking!
Post # 6
I’m sorry you have to deal with that, it stinks. I’ve had a couple of people at my job do the same thing, but even go as far as tell me, “Maybe we’ll sneak in to watch the ceremony!” Er, what? I basically stopped talking about it around the office (a few co-worker friends are invited, but I obviously can’t invite everyone) and when those people ask questions about it, I just try to be as vague as I can. It’s possible that some people don’t understand or realize how much work and funds go into guests lists and how we have to be careful and pay attention to the size of the list. Still, total bummer.