(Closed) Coworkers threw me a surprise shower… didn't invite them…

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

In our office, we throw showers for all brides, babies, pretty much any excuse to celebrate and eat cake. It’s always with the understanding that they won’t necessarily be invited to the wedding. I know usually you shouldn’t invite people to a shower if they aren’t invited to the wedding, but office and church showers don’t always follow the same etiquette rules.

Post # 4
2954 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 1998

I wouldn’t worry about it  as it seems  like they threw if for you because they wanted to not so they could get an invite:)

Post # 5
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I wouldn’t worry too much over this. You aren’t obligated to invite coworkers, and they threw the shower for you out of the goodness of their hearts – not because they were expecting invites. Well, I don’t know them obviously, but that’s what it sounds like to me based on the way you’ve described the situation in your post. I would definitely invite them to the brunch reception as it could be a nice reaching out moment. I don’t think any coworkers should necessarily expect an invite when another coworker is getting married, and I think the brunch reception would be an appropriate event to extend an invite to. 

Post # 6
1132 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

It’s very common for coworkers to throw showers for weddings and babies. There’s no expectation of an invite tied into it, they’re just being nice. You can invite them to the reception if you want, and that’s a lovely thought, but you don’t have to. 

Post # 7
7774 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

In my opinion, you’re never obliged to invite anyone who throws/attends a shower where you don’t control the guest list.

And yes, my office did this for me too, though it was just in the lunch room after work with a combined gift and card. Offices often do this (also for other major events like leaving or having a baby) with no expectation of an invite.

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