(Closed) Crazy FMIL

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
3041 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

That sucks – both for you but perhaps most for your FI. It’s never nice to realise that your mum is crazy – my FI came to that conclusion a few years ago, and we’re still struggling with how to handle it.

My only advice is to keep it together, but be very harsh when it comes to outright sabotage of your wedding. If she holds the guest list hostage? Fine, tell her you’ll make a new one, not consulting her at all, and if she’s not OK with that – well, she’s free to miss the wedding if that’s what she decides to do. When people aren’t reasonable it doesn’t help to try to make things easier for them, they will just find something else to complain about. Plan the wedding with those that has a genuine interest in YOU, not themselves.

Post # 4
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee

I’m in sort of the same situation with my boyfriends sister. She actually reached out to him last night because it was his birthday and made it very clear she wants to mend inks with him but nothing to do with me. I think the best thing to do is have him go talk to her alone, and work on that first and then ease you into the situation. You being on the “outside” of the family, for lack of a better description, just adds to her resentment toward you. If he can talk to her first and try and make her understand your feelings, while still keeping hers in mind, it’ll make it easier for the two of you to eventually talk. Hope everything works out! 

Post # 5
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I am in the same situation. I think its wonderful that your fiance is standing beside you. You just need to have a talk with him. Agree on how you are going to handle any situations in the future and stand your ground. I wish you the best of luck, a long happy marriage, and a smooth beautiful wedding.

Post # 6
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’m in the same situation, except reversed with the mom and step-mom.  I’ve tried talking with the step-mom, but she either quickly changes the subject or talks right over me.  Its so odd to see how their family works.  That’s grea that your fiance is being so supportive of you.  My suggestion would be to just continue planning without her…try to enjoy the process and not let her ruin it for you (like my future FIL and future step MIL tried to do to us).  Wishing you the best of luck!

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