- 4 years ago
- Wedding: April 2018
You read correctly, this will be the 8th couple I get on the road to Married Land….some people make you laugh, others make you think, a couple make you sick….obviously, I make men want to get married…weird.
We’ve got this thing already..
As you can see that it far from sucks….this 2ct beauty is currently sitting in a ring box, behind a framed photo in his office…where its been for like…three weeks.
And he’s doing what every dude does once they get to this point….I like to call it, Test Charging…like a bull that runs at the matador and then veers off one direction or another right at the last minute, he keeps taking his girlfriend out on these super elaborate, mega awesome dates, and day trips and dinners, with that THING burning a hole in his pocket and then he loses his nerve…..I’ve seen it a hundred times….and what he needs is:
THE ENGAGEMENT MUSE!
Luckily he actually knows me….and I actually like him….and I’m completely besotted with his girlfriend who is one of my best friends…SO….like I told the last seven, its time to nut up and kneel down, let’s get engaged already!
He’s bringing her and the engagement ring to the Renaissance Festival on Saturday, she has NO CLUE that this is on its way…so it should be pretty easy to frame something up with little to no suspicion on her part, AND I’ve got Mr. 99 to run interference, he’s large, loud, bearded and in a kilt…there will be a ruckus any place he wanders…all he has to do is grab her hand and drag her along to look at mocassins or some shit while we make this happen.
We came up with several awesome ideas, all of which can be set up easily.
Option 1: Code Name: Operation Ding Dong: We have an entertainer that plays the Carillion, an intricate and enormous instrument that uses bells, they set it up in a meadow and its lovely and beautiful, he could take her to see the show and propose while he plays…
(I rate Operation Ding Dong at a solid 5 on Nona’s Proposal Scale)
Option 2: Code Name: Tinkerbell: There’s a vendor that makes these lovely, delicate, amazing hand carved fairies, and they’re displayed on this sprawling white tree that’s got a gazebo built around it, that particular part of the fair is in this shaded area, there’s a fountain nearby, I could run ahead, put the ring on one of the fairies and have him and her come along to look, find it and get engaged already!
(I rate Tinkerbell at a 7.5, because timing could be a situation)
Option 3: Code Name: Dumbo: That’s right, we got elephant rides up in this bitch, I don’t know any person that’s gotten engaged on a pachyderm, she’s adventurous and quirky by nature and I’d be nearby to snap a picture!
(This one gets an 8 from me…cause its and ELEPHANT)
Option 4: Codename: Royal Flush: Like every fair across the land, there are actors playing the Royal Court who preside with kingly and queenly grace over the majestic realm of dudes in cargo shorts with swords in their belts…BUT THAT’S NOT THE POINT! I’m sure it would take little to no coaxing on my part to coerce his or her highness…whoever looks more awesome to be involved in a betrothal endorsed by the king himself, its fun, its unexpected and a great memory.
(I give Royal Flush a 9.7 – It would be a 10, but odds are good I’m going to have to bribe this dude)
Either way, I think all of them are good ideas, and ultimatley I think he’s just going to have to shoot from the hip and do what feels right, of course something like that is always easier when you’ve got the 99’s backing you up and we totally know the answer is yes…that doesn’t make it any less scary…BUT in the interest of being interesting…
Which would you like? Remember she’s a rather eccentric and impulsive person, like I am, and actually wants to plan a surprise wedding, where the guests think they’re coming to a regular old BBQ and WHAM, while we wait for the grill to get got I marry those two up, they kiss and we can eat.