(Closed) Crossing the friendly line into flirty? You decide!

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Am I being silly for looking at this closely?
    no, you always want to be leery of someone trying to flirt : (5 votes)
    31 %
    no, he's totally flirting! : (0 votes)
    yes, it's not a big deal and he's probably trying to be helpful : (5 votes)
    31 %
    yes, stop reading into things so much : (6 votes)
    38 %
    other...please state below. : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I think it’s fine. I would just talk to your FI openly about it. The only time friendships really become a problem are when things are hidden.

    On a side note: Super cool that you met the Saved by the Bell writer!

    Post # 4
    Member
    46141 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Being engaged does not mean that you never again get to have a conversation with a married person of the opposite sex.

    A conversation across the hall is…a conversation across the hall.

    Post # 6
    Member
    10288 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I personally don’t see anything wrong with this guy reading your work. As long as it doesn’t develop into anything more, I don’t see it as an issue. I would definitely run something like this past your FI though. Guys can be tricky sometimes. My FI wouldn’t have an issue with something like this but some men do.

    ETA: Totally awesome on the “Saved By The Bell” guy! 

    Post # 7
    Member
    542 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    Nah I wouldn’t worry about it too much. You sound like you are 100 percent totally committed to your FI, and that other guy is married. I am also a writer, and as a result meet with different people all the time to discuss my work. It is not unusual. Try not to read too much into it unless something happens to make you think this guy’s intentions are not so honorable. At this time, it seems like he really is just looking for a great “meeting of the minds.”

    Post # 8
    Member
    1556 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I don’t think you are being silly for being aware of the possibility that any given interaction might have the potential for crossing the line.  I think it’s when we tend to not think that it’s ever a possibility is when we sometimes might find ourselves in a situation we never intended.

    Having said that, it doesn’t appear to me that there is anything at all objectionable going on here.  This other man is probably also happy to find someone else who shares an interest that not many others have.  Giving him your writing for him to take home to read is fine.  Now had he said, “Why don’t you bring some of your poetry over to my house on Saturday evening so that you can read it to me?” you might have an issue!

    Post # 10
    Member
    4510 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I’m sure everything’s fine and he really just wants to help you, nothing more. But still–I am always a little leery in these situations, too. It doesn’t hurt to have your eyes open, you know? Just in case things take a turn toward the flirtatious…you want to be aware, that’s all. 

    I always assume the best of people, but it’s true what you say–almost all the strangers I meet are men. Hmm.

    The topic ‘Crossing the friendly line into flirty? You decide!’ is closed to new replies.

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