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If you look at the very top of the main etsy page, there is a gray menu bar. Click on Alchemy, which will let you post something you want, and then people can 'bid' for the chance to fill your order. Of course, you can always contact a seller and ask them. That's what I usually like to do, if I like their other things. Good luck- etsy is awesome 
flowerpots.jpg (20.8 KB, 69 downloads) 2 years old 
If you look at the top, there is a button called Alchemy...you can put a request in here. I've never done this, so maybe someone else has experience here. I have just happened to find someone's work that I like and then personally contact them. My invitations are from here, as well as some signs I had made for the wedding...and I just started a conversation with that vendor directly.
I just posted on alchemy for some custom stationary and while I got a good amount of responses there wasn't anything that worked out.
I did find what I was looking for by contacting a specific seller and now we are in the design process.
So I would definitely do both - post on alchemy and keep looking for sellers on your own. Try changing up your search words so you get a better idea of what's out there. For instance I searched under: custom stationary and letterpress. I saw mostly different shops each time.
and if you're looking for something in particular you can post here and ask for recommendations.
Good luck and have fun! Etsy is addicting...
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I've seen a lot of posts where people have commissioned specific things on Etsy -- usually jewelry or something for bridesmaids gifts. Is there a place on the website where you post what you want and people respond or did those of you who have done something like that found a seller who makes a similar product and then contact them about a custom order?
Thanks!