Post # 1
So, my FI and I were on track to have about 100-115 people at our wedding in 9 months. Invites have not yet gone out, but our wedding details are fairly public.
My FI was recently offered a day time position at his company. He’s been working nights for 9 years and we have a 1 year old, so it is getting pretty tiring for all of us. Unfotunately, this job means a small paycut and we may need a second car (we are a one car family by choice since I only work part time).
So we are starting to rethink our wedding. Since we are paying for everything (yes, everything, no family is helping, my dad has stage IV cancer and his parents hate me), we are considering cutting the guest list in half. Unfortunately, this means some family would get cut, like his aunts/uncles from out of town who he hasn’t seen in many years. And all of our cousins would get cut, but we want to keep our closest friends that we talk to all the time.
Our wedding, our rules? Or what other options do we have? Neither of us is willing to postpone a wedding. And we don’t want to elope and have a big party later, we’ve already put the deposit down on the church/hall.
Post # 2
We started with children, simply because we didn’t want children at our wedding [if we had invited children, there would have only been like 10 in total, but some of those are the most ill behaved children i’ve ever seen in my entire life, so no thanks].
We didn’t invite anyone we’ve never met, so friends of our parents who they just wanted to invite.. or coworkers of our parents, were a no-go.
If we hadn’t talked to them [in person, phone, facebook, email] in 2 years, they didn’t get an invite either.
Post # 3
- Wedding: October 2014 - Our Backyard/Steakhouse
Daenaria727: would it be an option to do a non-meal time wedding? That way you can still invite everyone. Ie, have a 2 pm ceremony with an appetizer, cake, punch reception right after until about 5 or 5:30?
It’s a great option to make you budget stretch further and have everyone there.
Post # 4
My fiance wants to party. He’s being very difficult with cutting out what is least important. When we try cutting a few things out, the savings is about $1-$2k which is great, but at the end of the day we think it is worth keeping them in.
I’m doing a 100 person wedding at a historic church and hall for $11,500 US including a 4 hour open bar – that includes my dress. I think either we stick with this, or we just elope. Otherwise, we may look back and say, “We should have just spent the extra couple grand.”
Post # 5
Daenaria727: Does that include everything? There’s alot of extra things that creep up that can add to your budget.. attire, hair/makeup, shoes, invites, save the dates, postage, decor, candles, ect.
Have you sat down and wrote down a detailed budget? That will help you get a look at what your numbers are going to look like.
Post # 6
Our guest list is 90% his side, and 10% my side. I’m working to get that list finalized by the end of the month.We are only inviting kids that we’re related to, or kids of cousins. Plus, we know that most of our friends are thrilled to have a night away from their children – so it works out.
My list is pretty much decided, as our family is small and then I j ust have my list of friends. His family is large to begin with, and then his parents know a lot of people. I know when the list was firs thrown together his mom said that a lot of them would be taken out, but that more may be added. So, we’ll see.
We want to keep it around 250 though, and I think we’ll be fine. Hopefully. I am going with the “if you haven’t met them, or neither of us have talked with them in the last couple of years – no invite”.