(Closed) Dad's guest list and budget issues–stressed!

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

At some point in our adult lives, we need to learn to say NO to our parents.  Its ok to do.  This is your wedding, and more importantly, you are paying for it, so you and your FI get the final say.

When you tell dad, mention something like, “I couldn’t pick Great Aunt Tilly out of a crowd of 20 year old hipsters, dad.  I hope you understand.  Maybe we’ll see her and Cousin Joe at the next family reunion.”  Keep it light, but stay firm.

Post # 4
Member
45387 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would just give him a finite number of guests that he can invite and let him choose who those people are. I would tell him that if he didn’t give me the that list of people, we will only be inviting the first (fill in the blank with your number) people on his list that you already have.

You can stand up to your parents without severing any relationship. Just tell them that you do not want a large wedding, nor will you be having one. If he wants to invite all these people to a celebration in honor of your marriage, he is welcome to host a reception after you return from your honeymoon.

Post # 5
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Yes, you can invite just one great aunt/uncle. I invited only one cousin out of twelve- I haven’t see the others in five+ years- they’re not a part of my life.

Figure out the number you want- and tell you parents- “We have XX invites for our family. Decide who they are.”

You’re paying- you determine the guest list. End of story. You have to be firm about this- there’s no reason to put yourself in debt for people who aren’t part of your life.

Just say no!!! 🙂

Post # 7
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

You can just invite the one uncle if you want.

I invited only one of my cousins from a certain family. She is my godmother, so I invited her and her husband/children. She has 5 other siblings that I did not invite, because I have not seen them since her wedding when I was 9 years old.

I hate saying this, but it is your wedding, and you don’t have to invite people who know next to nothing about you.

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