Post # 1
At first I pictured having a fun party with drinking and music, but not really a dance-centric wedding. It is so hard for people to understand this: the notion that you can like music, like fun, but dread dancing.
I get embarrassed by dancing. i’m terrible on it, I get self-conscious, and I’m certain all eyes are on me – especially since I’ll have a freaking wedding dress on. Even if no one was watching, it’s not something I would enjoy – I don’t really know how to dance, therefore it’s not enjoyable.
We’ve created opportunities for fun: a photobooth, a carousel, mariachis, cocktail hour. We told the caterer that we’re not dancers, but she just sent over the event layout, and it’s all centered around a dance floor.
If other people want to dance, that is a-okay by me. But will putting a dance area front and center create the expectation that we’re going to dance? If I don’t dance, will people be bugging me all night, asking me why I’m not dancing? If we don’t have a dance area, does it just make it awkward for guests?
Other brides who aren’t dancers, but had dancing at their wedding: what was it like? Any tips???
Post # 3
Haha, okay I like to dance,but I will give you some words of encouragement to put you at ease..
Have you seen people dance at weddings?? I mean, my god! There will be drunk old people out there dancing like nobodies business! People will be staring at them, not at you. Trust me
Post # 5
I’ve been to plenty of weddings where the bride wasn’t on the dance floor very much.
Everything is going to be fine!
Post # 6
I feel just like you. It’s odd that I feel this way, since I took dance lessons from the age of three to fifteen, haha. But I hate it! I plan on doing the first dance, and no more dancing for me. I’m planning on spending my time visiting with my family members. I’m a bit worried about a couple people who I feel like will want to drag me onto the dance floor, but I’m just planning on avoiding them as much as possible 🙂 My parents went to a wedding recently where the bride hated dancing as well. She just did the first dance and then just visited & talked with guests for the rest of the night. No one asked her to dance since it seemed obvious she was happy visiting everyone.
Post # 7
I am not convincing you to like dancing, I was trying to give advice from somebody that does like to dance. I am phobic of closed in spaces and public speaking, not something that I will ever get over.
I am saying that you shouldn’t worry too much about it. It will be fine.
Post # 8
@Cady: Yeah, I read it incorrectly at first, and then removed it. Sorry. Panicked bride. (Smile.)
Post # 9
No its okay I totally understand!
Post # 10
I changed up the dance floor somewhat so it’s less focused on a dance area.
However, I do think people will still ask me why I’m not dancing. Do you think there’s a classy way that I can pull an “It’s my day,” and not come off like a b!tch but get people off my case quickly? 🙂
Post # 11
That is a hard one for me to answer.
I am a people pleasure, so if they insisted I would go out and do alittle jig for a few seconds just to humor them and then get back to talking to people. I do not know how comfortable you are with that though.
I know from being at other weddings that people never really insisted on the bride dancing. They just hit the dance floor themselves.
Post # 12
MrJ and I are not dancers. Can’t dance, don’t like to dance, end of story. We’ll do a first dance and the parent dances, but that’s about it. We do have a sort-of dance floor planned, but we’re making it more of a cocktail lounge. We want people to be able to dance if they want, but be comfortable just hanging out. So there’s a few high tables and some chairs scattered around the area. We wanted to encourage people to get up from their dinner tables without feeling like they had to dance, but they could if they wanted. We’ll see how it works. 🙂
Also I think you’ll be fine – do what you want, no one will question the one in the white dress.
Post # 13
I’m actually disabled, so aside from the traditional dances I will not be dancing at all and I have been a guest at weddings where people asked why I wasn’t dancing/wanted to make sure I was having a good time etc. Not wanting to create drama I usually just went and danced and then paid for it later. I won’t be doing that at my wedding though! I plan on telling anybody who asks that I am using this time to catch up with people/get to know my new husbands family and then follow through with it! Spend the dance party chatting with people, as long as you don’t keep them away from the dancing I think it’s a great time to socialize with your guests one on one.
Post # 14
I feel kinda the same way. I love music but never danced and don’t know how. My fiancee and I are planning on dance lessons before the wedding but I’m still nervous. Most everyone who knows me knows I don’t dance so I don’t think anyone will be dragging me and maybe it will be the same for you? Can you take dance lessons just to feel more secure?
Post # 15
@conkin420: I think what brought this panic on was the fact that at my bachelorette, a friend tried to DRAG me out to dance with a belly dancer! To the point that I was using all of my weight to prevent myself from being physically dragged, and my arm was bruised. I don’t know why, but I really think they felt it was upon themselves to make sure I had fun, and again, in most people’s minds that means dancing!
When someone tries to cajole me into dancing, the situation is so embarrassing, that the panic gets worse and I’m frozen and there’s no way you’ll be able to get me on the floor.
@Bayoumaharajah: I like your answer and may steal it – if I say that I’m catching up with friends we don’t get to see often, I think that may work!
@everyone: I forgot to mention we will not have a first dance or any other kind of dance. If I get drunk enough and people don’t pester me and I feel comfortable, I may wiggle my hips for a little, but it’s very likely I may not dance at all.
Post # 16
Amen, sister. I feel the same way! I always tend to awkwardly avoid dancing at weddings, at least until I get a few drinks in me . But I have a feeling at your own wedding it won’t be a problem!