(Closed) Dating Again….

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1470 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@victoria1990:  I would be wary of a 40 yo who asks out a 22 yo, who goes clubbing until 330 and introduces her to his daughter so soon. But, you never know.

when I was 20 I grabbed coffee with a 40 yo, then went on a date or two. We kissed. it was awkward. I still cringe when i think about it now. When I was 21 I dated a 34 yo. He was very cool, smart, sweet, attractive. He was quick to give me a toothbrush for sleepovers, go on trips with me, etc. We broke up after awhile bc I still had some growing up to do. We were in different places. His guy friends loved me, their wives not so much 🙂 The memories of him dont make me cringe at all, I’m more just amused by it. It’s so odd to think that I’m just NOW the age he was when we were together. I’ve been through so muh since then.

IMO you should not date this guy (or take it extremely slow at least), for 2 reasons: his age and the fact that you just ended a serious relationship less than a week before you met this man.

 

Post # 4
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think you need to date and not settle down with one man yet.  Beware of this 40 year old man.  Not only because of his age but also because he seems to be a bit clingy.  You don’t want to jump into a relationship with a man that is so hot to contact you ASAP even if it does feel like you’ve known one another for quite some time.  Truth is you know very little about him and he knows very little about you. 

Just cool your jets a little and give yourself some time to get to know you.  🙂

Post # 5
Member
75 posts
Worker bee

Do you think that you may be rebounding a bit with this guy? Since you just got out of a relationship, it’s completely normal to want to duplicate the closeness and intimacy you once had with your ex, so it is really easy to transfer those feelings to someone new. As someone who went from a 3 year relationship directly into an 8 month relationship with less than a week in between, I can testify that I completely lost myself going from one relationship directly into another. Just be wary of the situation. Sure, it is really flattering to be getting attention from this guy, but it seems like he is taking advantage of the situation, and if you’ve been honest with him about your recent breakup, he should want to pump the brakes a bit.

There’s nothing wrong with taking some time for yourself. It can be really hard to be alone, especially when you’re used to being in a relationship, but it’s probably the smartest thing you can do for yourself right now.

Post # 6
Member
525 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Okay, you asked how to know if he’s serious, so here’s my honest opinion:  a 40-year-old man isn’t going to be serious about a 22-year-old woman.  Sure, there are going to be exceptions to this rule, but in general, no.  If he respected you, he wouldn’t want to spend THIS much time with you right off the bat and he wouldn’t go clubbing with you until 3:30 in the morning.  He sounds immature.

Slow down…you’re young and there are many men out there.  Don’t be afraid to date around and have some fun.  If he’s serious about you, he’ll tell you…but right now, it’s too soon for him to be serious about you.

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