- 7 years ago
My 24yo daughter is getting married this July 16th, (4 weeks before her brother’s wedding).
Anyway, daughter does not seem excited about her wedding. Bride was out shopping for shoes with older sister and the older sister told her she didn’t seem all that excited about the wedding. To which my bride to be said, “well, why should I? No one else seems excited” To which her older sister said, “if no one seems excited it’s because we don’t sense that your excited – the brides’ excitement is supposed to feed every one else’s excitement”.
In the last week, people have asked me if my daughter is excited about getting married because they are concerned. My sister hasn’t even bought her plane ticket yet ‘because she doesn’t think my daughter really wants to get married!
What have a missed? I feel clueless.
Background, daughter lives 2hrs away from me, I don’t see her much either because of her schedule or mine. She prefers to text or email rather than talk to me on the phone. I’ve not always gotten along with her fiance but for the last year there have been no instances.
She didn’t want her FMIL to meet me till closer to the wedding and her fiance actually told his Dad that they didn’t need to meet us (F&MOB) until the day of the wedding! Older sister feels it’s because FIL have more money and have decided to pay the bulk of the wedding because I could only give my daughter a $3,000 budget (which I thought was extremely generous).
My daughter and her fiance really only wanted a small intimate wedding but FFIL (yes the fiance’s dad), wants MORE and since he is footing the bill for MORE he is having a lot of say.
But somehow I’m sensing this is not what my daughter wants at all and is unhappy.
She ‘can’t’ talk to me when around her fiance because he quizzes her on everything (yes a little controlling – but I’ve learned he gets that from his father).
How can I approach my daughter or help her if she feels trapped?
Thank you –