Post # 1
I just deactivated my FB because I feel like it’s interfering with my life too much. Sometimes I unattentionally do things for validation, but it never really bothered me until today. I got a haircut, took a selfie and was thinking of posting it, but then I thought again to myself, why? Stuff like that I guess. I’m sure everyone understands where I’m coming from. My FI hates facebook and hasn’t been on in months, and I guess that kind of helps with me not needing it either. Like when we first got engaged, I HAD to tell everyone on FB about it. Today, I thought about it again and asked myself, WHY?! WHYYY do I love this online attention? It’s stupid to me now, and I’m really glad I think that way. I love going on weddingbee way more than going on facebook. It’s much more fun.
I will say, I love instagram though because of the limitations of what one can post. No phony articles, no depressing news or heated comments, etc. Also, I hate not knowing the privacy of your facebook account and what govt. institutions and other people can read your stuff. I guess I could go on and on about who can access private emails and other things, but right now I think just the need for attention from facebook is the main reason I don’t want to go on it anymore.
If anyone feels the same way, please join me in this pact! I could use a buddy in this. We don’t need FB to feel good about ourselves. God I miss being a 90s kid.
Post # 2
I’ve seriously limited how much I post (a few times a month at most), and I don’t post anything that I wouldn’t be willing to tape to my office door. I think if you can enforce moderation, it has its benefits.
I don’t live near any of my friends or family, and Facebook is really helpful in letting me stay updated about the kinds of things that you’d normally talk about when you see people regularly. My fiancé and I have lived in 3 states in the last 3 years, and Facebook has helped us to feel less isolated from our friends and family who are all hundreds or thousands of miles away now, so I’m grateful for it.
Post # 3
I deactivated my Facebook account a couple months back due to drama my older sister was stirring. But my FI and I live in different parts of the county than our family and friends do, and it was eating up my step mom that she couldn’t keep in touch with me/see how FI and I are doing. So I reactivated it, but I really don’t post much and if I do, it’s to keep in touch with close family.
Istagram on the other hand: I don’t know how I feel about it. I try it. But I can’t get over the feeling that no one gives a flying flip about what my dinner looks like or whatever is popular to take pictures of. I dunno, I guess I would rather hear about someone’s day than see picures of their food, their commute, selfies in the bathroom etc.
Post # 4
catpeaches: You definitely don’t need Facebook to feel good about yourself. My friend knows I don’t have FB and says “I don’t know how you do it”. Huh? Lol. Everyone I know is always aggravated with it. I am not sure what part of it is the appealing part, maybe that part got lost. I know it was originally designed to keep far-away friends in touch, but it seems like a stage now for all sorts of acting/posing. It’s interesting from my outside perspective as a non-user. Personally, I’m not a fan of the lack of privacy. I don’t really want to know what anyone is doing and I don’t want anyone to know what I am doing.
I think it would be a good idea to take a break and get out into nature and forget FB exists if it’s hurting your self-esteem. I know a lot of people get technology/social media overload and need a break. When I feel like I am spending too much time on my laptop researching/studying/scrolling, I stop what I am doing and go outside. If you can’t live without it, you can always go back. 🙂 Good luck!
Post # 5
I am on the fence about this. I 100% think that people can put too much energy into Facebook and sometimes all the fluff is too much. But at the same time, when thinking about big moments, engagement for example, I’m not looking for validation from a computer program or something “fake”, there are real people on the other end of that internetwho you are sharing the news with. Old friends, super extended family, family friends – all people I wouldn’t call or tell in person but who still want to hear the news in a timely manner, not through the grape vine eventually. And of course, I love to know when these people have huge life events too.
Think about it, only 5ish years ago we used to pay to put an “ad” in the newspaper announcing your engagement! Now THAT’S validation from strangers.
Post # 6
I just deactivated my account a few weeks ago and have not been tempted to log back on. I just got sick of people broadcasting all their BS, seeing people announce their engagements (partly bc I’ve been impatiently waiting for my SO to propose), and pregnancies. Still debating on whether or not I should delete my Instagram…
Post # 7
I had a FB page for a few months about 5 years ago. I shut it down when I realised it was a popularity contest and a way for my old school bullies to continue to be jerks. I don’t need that crap following me into adulthood! I escaped them!!!
I actually think it’s scary how most people I know seem to rely on FB to maintain friendships… of course they’re really just posting news about themselves. I’m sure everyone I’ve ever met now thinks I’m dead because I don’t have a FB! 😉
Post # 8
GemmaBella: definitely a stage for acting and posing 🙁 i feel like that’s what it’s come down to, even if i try to tell myself it’s good for keeping up with friends. because really, i only keep up with like 10 close friends on there even with my 700 friends list. those people just wouldn’t care about how i am doing in real life, so i feel like they’re essentially fake friends. yes, we do know each other but we’ve probably only hung out a few times or maybe we’re just acquaintances.
thanks for your wisdom! i will definitely try to get our more. i am an artist and i’m constantly working indoors in my little studio with my laptop (and FB open) on hand. 🙂
Post # 9
- Wedding: December 2014 - Norton Country Club
rubysparks: “I don’t post anything that I wouldn’t be willing to tape to my office door”- I love this. I am already an under-sharer compared to most of my friends & family online, but I think this is an awesome way to phrase the way I feel about it.
Post # 10
catpeaches: When I was going through my divorce, I got off FB because I didn’t want people asking a whole bunch of personal questions in such a public forum. I thought after the news blew over, like a couple weeks, I’d be back on. Nope! Didn’t miss it at.all. I did go back after a year and a half because it seemed 2 important people used that as their way to communicate, but am rethinking it again. It just seems there’s more garbage than good and like Instagram better, too!
Post # 11
- Wedding: June 2015 - Dreams Las Mareas - Costa Rica
I understand exactly what you mean…
I went through something FB related a few years ago. It was very weird. I was constantly comparing my life to others. I dont have a bad life at all. But my FB friends were super humble braggers… Always traveling… meeting celebrities.. husbands rubbing their feet every night… lol.. i realized i was becoming depressed for no reason. it was really hard to even admit to myself thats what I was doing. So i just “hid” 90% of the updates…lol… it made me refocus. after about 2 years… i slowly started unhiding people.. i missed marriages, deaths, and even pregnancies (Im sure i seemed like a bad friend for not congratulating or sending condolences)… but i needed a break from everything without disconnecting from my family down south.
Post # 12
Everdeen: Ha, the newspaper announcement is a great point!!
Post # 13
I haven’t had facebook in years. I did have to create a “dummy” account because some businesses only have facebook page and I was having trouble looking at them without an account. I never joined any other social media (i.e. Twitter, Instagram, etc.), so I guess I never knew what I was missing. Once you go a few weeks without Facebook you won’t hardly miss it!
Post # 14
im going through this at the moment! Trying to take a break! Realised i was doing alot of stuff for validation and would get wound up if things didnt generate enough ‘likes’ ridiculous huh! Im having a breather! ANd thinking twice before posting now! x
Post # 15
Sometimes I think about deactivating because, in all honesty, I want things to be a surprise for people when I run into them after having not seen them in a while. It takes the element of surprise out of everything. Even if you haven’t seen someone in 5 years they still know you’re recently engaged, or married, or whatever.