- 2 weeks ago
To sum things up, one of my FH’s younger sisters is a complete nightmare. She causes most of our disagreements and he is very passive & does not set boundaries. She has shown up at our house wasted on multiple occasions unannounced, jumping in our shower, getting angry if we go on a date and don’t invite her, etc. She is getting married to one of HIS friend’s so not only do I have to deal with her at family stuff but also with friend stuff. The only time I have ever encountered her sober was while she was pregnant. She gets completely loaded whether its a family event or not. We got engaged in December and planned our wedding for this fall instead of next year because her plan was to get married summer of 2018. In late January she decided to do a destination wedding THIS July, which has added an additional $1300 in expenses to our budget for this year.
So after several months of mulling it over, I decided to ask all 3 of his sisters to be my bridesmaids. I adore the other 2 but knew I couldn’t exclude her. My FH insisted on 6 groomsmen, so I thought it would be obvious to only have my 3 fam/bff BM and not invite his 3 sisters. I am thrilled that the other 2 are going to be a part of our wedding, but I am having waves of anxiety about this particular sister. She has asked me at least 6 times about the BM dresses and makes backhanded comments like “please dont do this color. please make sure they’re cute.” “Can I have a picture with just him(my FH)?” Immediately trying to take the reigns in planning my bachelorette, etc.
I am very low key AND this is my second wedding. It’s his first which is why we are going through all of this at all. I wanted this to be a simple & stress-free day but I just have a sickening feeling that she will ruin it. We went to a friend’s the other night for a bday and this sister ended up getting into a yelling match with one of the male friends and then proceeded to vomit all over the living room. I am having visions of her stumbling down the aisle because heaven forbid there should be a mimosa while getting ready.
I am already feeling pressure and stress from his parents about certain components like the ceremony and save the dates, so this is icing on the cake. I don’t know how to handle this situation but I want to be able to enjoy myself, my FH and the wedding I am spending money on.