(Closed) Dealing with kids at the reception

posted 8 years ago in Reception
  • poll: Check any you think are rude of me :)
    Asking our photog not to waste her time on photos of kids we don't even know : (4 votes)
    12 %
    Asking parents to supervise their children in the photobooth : (2 votes)
    6 %
    Asking parents not to give their children sparklers : (5 votes)
    15 %
    None are offensive : (17 votes)
    52 %
    You're a loon, stop obsessing over kids and move on! : (5 votes)
    15 %
  • Post # 3
    4512 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Hm. How about hiring a couple babysitters to be around to entertain and manage the kids? That way you don’t have to post signs or have the DJ make announcements asking parents to look after their kids. A couple of babysitters could make sure the kids don’t get into the sparklers and generally keep them under control, freeing the parents to enjoy the party.

    Re the photos… I think it’s ok, if not standard, for you to specify to the photog the people you want him or her to focus on (immediate family members, etc.). If you ask him or her not to photograph any of the kids, that’s your call, and totally fine–no one will know!

    Post # 4
    544 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Regarding the photographer, maybe just ask for each kid to get photographed once for proof they were there and to appease that aunt and uncle, but to focus on the adults. That may be the easiest way to do it.

    Post # 5
    411 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I definitely think it’s okay to tell people to supervise their kids in the photobooths and with the sparklers. I would also say something to the effect of you not being responsible for any injuries due to sparklers as well. Though, don’t obsess over kids playing with them. If you don’t want kids to play with them, don’t have them. The adults will probably be playing with them more than the kids anyway.

    I think you’re being overzealous with the kid thing though overall. While kids are cute and adorable, I highly doubt that, even if you don’t say anything, you’ll have more than 5-10 photos of kids. If it makes you feel more comfortable, mention that you only want a few pics of the kiddos. I love looking back on weddings I’ve been to, and seeing the pro pics of me as a kid.

    I understand the desire to put rules in place, but in the end, I think you’re going to have to take a deep breath and stop thinking about it. Things will happen as they do – even the most prepared bride can’t cover everything.

    Post # 6
    505 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I think that for your wedding you should be entitled to have things the way you want them.  It is definitely unfortunate that you have to invite children since it seems like it kind of stresses you out, are you sure you shouldn’t re-think that?

    As is, if they have to be there…

    For photographs, get all of your family’s children in a couple of family photographs when you take the family pictures, that way their picture is taken care of and you can have your photographer focus on the adults and the details of the day.

    I would definitely suggest providing a kids table or area where there is plenty for the kids to do so that they won’t be running around.  Cover it with a paper tablecloth, crayons, coloring books, puzzles, toys or anything that can possibly keep their attention for long periods of time.

    I would definitely make sure to point out in signs and through the DJ that the photo booth is for ages 12 and up.  Like a buffet with the signs that say “Children under 10 must be accompanied by an adult.”  There might be some who slip by and break rules, but it is less likely to happen this way.

    I personally am having kids at my reception, I have 2 daughters who are in the wedding and my brothers’ children, who I have never met, will also be flying into town with them and I would never not have invited them.  I took my daughter to a wedding when she was 2 years old (my brother’s wedding actually) and I kept her with me the entire time.  She was either at the table with us or on the dance floor right next to us the entire night.  She actually ended up falling asleep on 2 chairs put together.  We will be making a kids table that is right next to the dance floor to keep them entertained.  The food will be just a few steps away so if they need something someone can easily get it for them.  With the exception of the bathroom they should have no reason to just be wandering around.  Don’t get me wrong, I definitely want them to have a lot of fun, but I don’t want any incidents.

    Have you considered hiring someone you know to babysit the children at their table, or in another room, or even at someone’s house?  I had thought about doing that because there is a park about a 10 minute walk away from the reception venue, but I don’t have the budget for it and I really don’t know anyone that could do it.

    Post # 8
    1184 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    i’m not a big kid person either so i totally get where you’re coming from, and i don’t think any of those things you listed are offensive. we are trying to keep kids to a minimum (FI has a 12 year old brother or else they’d be eliminated all together) because to be perfectly honest, they are more mouths to feed and most caterers i’ve talked to seem to think that anyone over 10 is an adult and will be charged accordingly (i’m not even going to get into the insanity of places charging a per person fee for alcohol and including teenagers in the count). given that these kids are coming to your wedding though, i think the best thing to do is be prepared. i absolutely agree that you should try to find room in your budget to hire a couple babysitters for the evening. when i was in college i actually once got roped into filling in for a sick friend as a wedding babysitter, and while i had a miserable time (did i mention i’m not a kid person?), the kids had a blast and the parents could enjoy themselves. the venue had a lower level and the bride and groom had stocked it with a few toys (puzzles, games, etc). i’d say definitely get at least 2 sitters though, as kids have a tendency to want to go in 7 different directions at once.

    Post # 9
    1184 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    fyi, as a poor college kid i was willing to babysit 6-7 kids for the duration of the entire wedding by myself for $100 (i think it was $20/hr for 4 hours plus a $20 tip because the parents saw how much work it was), so it wouldn’t be too much of an addition to the budget.  if there’s a college campus anywhere near your venue, you can usually list jobs like that either in an online forum or put a flyer up on campus.

    Post # 11
    446 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    This is not a conversation I’m looking forward to having with FI’s mom… There are a LOT of kids on his side and I am not a kid person.

    That being said, I think the signs and the announcements are more than appropriate. I think if you have a relative who offers to help in the “Oh, let me know if you need help with anything” sort of way, you could ask them to pop their head in the lobby and check on the photo booth every now and then.

    In my experience though, there’s always someone who will step in and discipline unruly kids. lol, my mom being one of them! She doesn’t care if it’s not her kid, she’ll tell them they’re out of line. So you may not even have to worry.

    Post # 12
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    if there are only going to be 6 children there then i totally dont dont think you need to worry about it that much. I wouldnt giv sparklers to those under 10 and just have the dj announce that photo booth should be used with adult supervision.. 6 children is really not a big deal. i think you are stressin about it because u didnt even want them there at all.. 

    Post # 13
    376 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    As a mom, I wouldn’t dream of giving my kid a sparkler. Also, I monitor my kid like crazy at events like weddings b/c frankly if he gets out of control, it reflects on ME and my Fiance and makes us look bad :). I would assume that most of the parents at your wedding would do this too. 

    The sign outside the photobooth is okay, but may be unnecessary as your attendant should be able to shoo away kids playing inside. Most photographers don’t take a lot of pictures of kids who aren’t IN the wedding anyway, but it couldn’t hurt to mention it to him. 

    Also, I’d LOVE a babysitter at a wedding. I would probably send you an extra gift after the wedding as a sign of my appreciation πŸ™‚

    Post # 14
    682 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I think you are fine with speaking to the photographer and setting out the signs. In my experience, most parents with smaller children will keep an eye on them and not let them run wild, especially at a wedding. At my BM’s wedding all the little kids were actually on the dance floor having a great time and not destroying anything. I think you are worrying too much about it.

    Post # 15
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    If they must come (I feel your pain!), I think all your requests are totally totally valid. 

    Post # 16
    1079 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Absolutely have a babysitter or two. Ours kept the kids quiet during the ceremony (that was my big worry) and gave parents some relief during the evening so they could actually have fun.

    The topic ‘Dealing with kids at the reception’ is closed to new replies.

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