Post # 1
Are you guys afraid of anxiety or nerves on the day? Why, and what do you intend to do about it?
Share your stories!
For me, I think the worst bit will be walking down the aisle. My Father and I have discussed this, and we have decided that I shouldn’t be given away, because of the symbolism. The only problem is that this means I will walk down the aisle alone, because FI doesn’t want to walk with me. I also don’t want to “replace” my Dad by having someone else walk with me. He and I have a very close relationship, and replacing him is rather missing the point!
The more I think about it, the more I think that it will be a long walk down that aisle, with everyone looking at me. I also know that people will gossip and say that I have had some sort of falling out with my Dad, which I hate. *Sigh*
Anyway… stories? Fears? Feel free to share!
Post # 3
I’m terrified that I’m going to burst out in tears when I see my mom or my fiance. I don’t want pictures of that 🙂 but I know everything good and bad that happens will just be a great story later. I’m excited to see how it all happens, for better or worse. 🙂
Post # 4
@MrsSmallIsSoTall: THIS. I’m so afraid of me being in tears half the day. I’m such a sap in emotional situations which is why we are taking pictures before the ceremony because when I cry a lot my eyes get really poofy. It’s also why I want a 15 minute long quick ceremony because I don’t want to be up in front of people for 45 minutes balling my eyes out. I’m so nervous about it.
Post # 5
@MissDarthVader: i never thought about taking pictures beforehand to avoid puffy faced pictures. I’m so traditional, I don’t want to see my FI before. But doing it to calm nerves or have time to fix my face is something to consider. I also have thought about a quick ceremony because I may just get so nervous that I get sick. It’s got nothing to do with the marriage- I just hate being the center of attention!
Post # 6
I’m afraid that I’ll trip on my walk down the aisle, or that the champagne will go to my head and I’ll make a fool of myself at the reception!
Post # 7
I am BEYOND worried about anxiety day-of. I’m not worried about actually marrying him, but I have somatic anxiety even when I don’t ‘feel’ anxious. It makes me nauseated and/or actually vomit most mornings, and it’s worse when I actually consciously feel anxious, so I’m terrified of how I will feel the morning of the wedding. I just got a Xanax prescription and thank god that helps a bit when it’s bad… I’m more worried about how I will feel getting ready etc. than at the wedding. And hey, if you’re most anxious about walking down the aisle, at least you have your dad’s arm to hold you up! 🙂 I’m sure I’ll cry during the ceremony, but I’m okay with that.
Post # 8
@loving_life: In my case… nobody is walking me down the aisle! That’s what makes me nervous. My Mum wasn’t given away either, but when I called her and asked for advice then she just told me to grow a pair!
Post # 9
@MrsSmallIsSoTall: I had the same concern about it not being “traditional” – so we have planned to do a “reveal” with just him at the altar and our groomsmen and bridesmaids around us; I’ll walk down with him facing away, and then when i’m close enough, the photographer will prompt him to turn around. One of my cousins did this, and it was such a magical and special moment. Then they could take their pictures, and do the ceremony tear-fear-free!
Post # 10
@Rachel631: i didnt want to be given away either, but I still walked down with my Dad. We had some wording at the start to say that my Dad was not giving me away, but accompanied me to symbolise both families’ affirmation of our decision to spend our lives together. We had a humanist wedding so we were able to do whatever wording we wanted. Don’t know if that is an option for you?
As for nerves, mine were awful. I dropped 5lbs in the few days before just on adrenaline, I was terrified Id cry through my vows and embarass myself! As it was I grinned all day long!
Post # 11
- Wedding: October 2014 - UK
@Rachel631: I’m just going to be an anxious wreck all the way to the church and through the service, and I might have a bit of an existential anxiety-attack afterwards as well.
I don’t handle change very well, haha! I’ve warned my friend I might try and climb out the window beforehand, but she’s promised to have some scheme set up to catch me, possibly involving a pack of specially-trained dogs.
Post # 12
@Rachel631: I vomited 3 times in the hours leading up to my wedding. After all was said and done i realized I had absolutely nothing to be worried about.
Post # 13
@Loupyloo: … on the bright side, at least you dropped 5lb… I have unexpectedly gained that! I imagine it’s the cortisol.
I’m a bit more limited because it’s a church wedding, and my father has already said that he doesn’t want to walk with me because he doesn’t agree with it. I agreed with him 100%… it’s only now that nerves are starting to set in!
@chronicwhimsy: I actually had a mini panic attack after my disasterous dress fitting two days ago… afterwards, at home, I was practically breathing into a bag and saying “I can’t do this” over and over again. I really want to marry FI, don’t get me wrong… and I want to be married to FI… I’m just not so sure (and, in fact, I’ve never been sure) that I want an actual wedding. Still… too late now!
@Aquaria: I get that! Nerves have set off my IBS now… it’s grim. I keep puking in the mornings as well.
Post # 14
I have a history of anxiety/panic attacks, though in the last few years I’ve managed to get it more or less under control. That said, I’m really scared about having issues the day of the wedding – or during the wedding, or even in the days leading up to…ugh. Of course, worrying about stress only causes MORE stress, so that’s no good either.
We’re getting married outside, which I hope means at least not feeling stuffy/claustrophobic. Our ceremony is about 30 minutes long (max) and I’m just really hoping to be so happy and so focused on the amazingness of everything that I won’t feel nervous. I will also be taking gravol and immodium as a precaution!!
Post # 15
I am usually anxious about, like, everything, but really I was not anxious at ALL the week before nor the day of. I was worried that the flowers wouldn’t get done properly, but my friends all pitched in and everything worked perfectly. I think my anxiety was calmed by the fact that I knew exactly what I was going to wear, and how my hair would be done, and everything.
Post # 16
- Wedding: October 2014 - UK
@Rachel631: The last couple of days I’ve been really struggling to get my head around the ‘being married to him’ part. I don’t want anyone other than my FH, we are perfectly happy together, but the ‘married and together forever’ thing is a bit mind-boggling – even though I had no intention of not being with him in the future!