Post # 1
Hey Bees I need your help..
I’m getting remarried after losing my last husband. We had a child together and I am still very close with my MIL…she will now be my old MIL 🙁 SHe has made little comments as she feels like she will be losing me too now that I’m getting remarried.
I want to incorporate her in the ceremony somehow. My new husband will be presenting my daughter with a wedding gift and make a promise to her (still need to work that out) but I was thinking of him asking for my MIL’s blessing as well and making a promise to her to take care of her grandchild etc etc…….. Any ideas on how I can do this and what to say??
Post # 3
I don’t have any experience with this, but what a nice thought.
I’m so sorry you lost your first husband, and I think it is beautiful that you are considering your former MIL’s needs. And I’m happy for you that you have found love again 🙂
Post # 4
I think it’s very sweet that you don’t want her to feel left behind. I would consider having your DH make the commitment to her another time other than the ceremony.
Post # 5
@pfizertobe: I’m just thinking – I’m not sure if I would incorporate her in the CEREMONY. But I think the private conservation in which you BOTH promise to take good care of her grandchild and keep her father’s memory alive might be sweet. Not really sure about your fiancee asking her in regards to your MARRIAGE for her blessing though? Grief is a strange thing, you know? That might be painful for her.
But the grandchild part is lovely 🙂
Post # 6
@pfizertobe: What about including her with a corsage with the other Moms?
Post # 7
How lovely and beautiful that you want to include your first-husband’s mother!
I agree with @creativeplannertobee: I think it would be wonderful to include your deceased husband’s mother with the other mothers in the ceremony.
Post # 8
I wouldn’t include her in the ceremony. But I would give her a corsage, sit her first row with the other moms… and maybe your future husband could write her a letter? like, promising to take care of her grandchild, etc?
Post # 9
I am still close to my ex mother-in-law too. I called her and ex FIl my outlaws.
As your marriage is a new chapter in your life, I would not include her in the ceremony per se, But I would honor her with a corsage, a prime seat, and a mention in the groom’s speech at the reception.
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2014 - South Bonson Pier & Community Centre
Yes, I think incorporating her with a corsage and asking her to sit with family would be nice. And to thank her in your speach would be good enough, too. I think anything directly related to her in the ceremony would be weird (unless you’re asking for the blessing of all parents during the ceremony).
Post # 11
@_Adelaide_: @julies1949: @bebero: @Brielle: @creativeplannertobee: @janesteroni:
Thank you all for your suggestions. I really didn’t that it might be odd to have a time set out for her but I think you’re right. I will go with the corsage and prime seat idea. I hope that will be enough to have her feel special.
Thank you guys
Post # 12
Just an idea for a present to the daughter, maybe a locket with you and her fathers picture in it or something that she can hold on to so she can remember that he’ll always be part of the family even though he’s no longer able to be with you? Just a thought lol
Post # 13
How is your new husband presenting your daughter with a wedding gift and making a promise to her? Will she be seated and at a certain point in the ceremony come to both of you? If so, maybe your old MIL can accompany her (present her, if you will) and then return to her seat.
If you’re doing a “traditional” recessional, maybe old MIL can walk out right behind the parents… maybe with your daughter.
Echoing what others have said… I think it’s wonder ful that you want to include her.
Post # 14
@pfizertobe: The fact you care and are trying so hard is beautiful. She will recognize your efforts, I promise 🙂
Post # 15
Maybe your daughter could be a flower girl and your MIL could walk with her…
Post # 16
I think incorporating your MIL into the ceremony is a wonderful idea! When you decide on an idea please let us know!