Decided to do first look…not sure about decision

posted 3 years ago in Traditions
Post # 3
Member
1952 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We’ve decided on a first look to save time. I stupidly decided to put the reception straight after the ceremony and didn’t realised until after I sent the invites out, so it’s more a practical thing. 

Post # 4
Member
2319 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We’re doing the first look as both an opportunity for my FI and I to “to take each other’s wedding look *in*” and for some nice photographs. As we’ll be signing the ketubah (Jewish wedding document) before the ceremony, we’ll already be seeing each other before the ceremony as it is.

Post # 5
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I decided to do a first look, not only for time reasons, but also to have a private moment with FI before the ceremony. I like the idea that when we first see each other we will be able to talk and hug and not have to restrain ourselves because of the ceremony. FI is also not a fan of the spotlight, so I am hoping it will calm his nerves.

Post # 6
Member
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

My FI asked if we could do one – it is one of the only things he feels really strongly about regarding the wedding, so I am on board. I could go either way. I think it will be nice to knock out the family pictures beforehand though!

Also I know that we will both value the alone time together. We’re planning on taking a few more alone pictures during the first half of the cocktail hour. We’re pretty introverted so I think the breaks will be nice.

Post # 7
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@HuskerGirl:  The tradition stems from arranged marriages in which the groom would not see the bride at all before their wedding ceremony, and he would not have an opportunity to re-think the marriage and get cold feet. I think your groom will still marry you if he sees you before the ceremony 🙂 We are doing a first look! You will still get to have that moment, and it will be more intimate! I have heard from other brides who did a first look that walking down the aisle is still a very emotional experience even though they saw one another earlier in the day. 

Post # 8
Member
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@HuskerGirl:  We did a first look for multiple reasons:

-Our ceremony was at 4:30 so we wouldn’t have lots of time for photos between the ceremony and supper

-We wanted to do the bridal party shots before the ceremony away from the guests because we figured it would be hard to round up everyone who needed to be in photos in a short period of time

-We thought that seeing each other before the ceremony would give us a more private moment to admire each other (our bridal party was there, but it was nice to celebrate with them too)

-Being able to see each other first and get over the surprise looks of each other calmed our nerves.  Neither of us like being the centre of attention, so the ceremony itself was enough to make us nervous.

-We always wanted to enter the ceremony together (I didn’t want to be given away, he didn’t want to stand up front and have everyone stare at him, and I like the idea that we made the decision to get married together so we enter the ceremony together), so seeing each other ahead of time wouldn’t ruin anything anyway

I absolutely do not regret our decision!

Post # 9
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014 - Kentucky Center for the Performing Arts

Well my Fiance wants to lift the veil after I walk down the aisle to him. He’s a bit traditional, so I doubt he would want ‘first look’ pictures. I did consider it because it is done a lot now and it would save time. But we will just have to make time for pictures afterwards. I will definitely have the photographer take as many of the required traditional pics before the ceremony without the groom and reserve about 30 minutes after the ceremony for pics with groom.

Post # 10
Member
150 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

We did a first look and I’m so happy we did!  The whole day was so hectic as far as getting ready and doing bridal shots that it was so nice to have an hour to spend with him, just the two of us (and our photogs).  It honestly brought my stress level down to basically zero and we got some of our favorite shots of the whole day.  I, too, was a little hesitant to not hold onto the tradition, but for me and even my husband, seeing each other during the ceremony gave us both butterflies and it was still a great memory.  Also, during the wedding reception, we were around all our family and friends so being super snuggly and affectionate was actually a bit tough and I’m glad we had that private time to have a little bit of intimacy that day.

Post # 11
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I want to do a first look but the FI is deadset against it.

I think you will not regret your decision you will still have that magical feeling when walking down the aisle either way !

As it gets closer and you think you are really deadset against it perhaps you can use the time to take photos with your girls and he can take photos with his guys

Or if the venue set up allows or pics like this:

 

Pictures with each other without seeing each other:

Blindfold

Stand on opposite sides of door

Post # 12
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@HuskerGirl:  Just to give you the other side of it in case you are still leaning towards not doing it (it sounded like your family pressured you into it)  

A first look was strongly suggested by our photographer to save time with pictures but I didn’t really want to and my husband even slept at his parent’s house the night before because he wanted to see me for the first time that day when I was walking down the aisle.  We saved time by doing all pics with me and my girls and my family and then him and the guys and his family before the ceremony so during cocktail hour we just needed the whole group and then our own pics.  We ended up making it back to cockatil hour 10 minutes before it ended so the hubby could have some of his precious oysters 🙂

My two absolute favorite pictures from that day are of him crying while I’m walking down the aisle.

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