Post # 1
I’m having trouble figuring out how to respond to people when they use the argument that the definition of marriage is between a man and a woman and to make marriage between same sexes would be to make it something other than marriage. These same people claim they are fine with civil unions, they just don’t want it called marriage.
My response has always been that society has changed the ‘definition’ of marriage and it is no longer perceived as something between a man and a woman but between two people. That begins that slippery slope argument of how marriage will then be between animals or multiple partners, etc. and you can’t make marriage something it’s not.
How do you respond to this?
Post # 3
@oracle: LOVE knows no gender… and beastiality is not comparable to homosexuality, that’s just absurd. There are plenty of straight couples who have ruined the “sanctity” of marriage and marriage should be based on love and committment with another person no matter their gender.
I don’t know, I haven’t had to defend it in awhile, but I get really heated about it! 😉
Post # 4
@oracle: @lovebirds08: Because I really don’t know, I want to ask and I mean no offense. What is wrong with calling it a civil union or commitment ceremony? Why is the word “marriage” so important? Is it only because of the legal benefits? That’s the usual reason I’ve heard. I wonder what would happen if civil unions had the same legal benefits as marriage. People may not get so bent out of shape over the word but rather focus on the meaning 🙂
Post # 5
Marriage is a civil right and should be open to all consenting adults, regardless of gender or orientation.
Holy matrimony is what these people are referring to. It is a religious ceremony. They are free to define holy matrimony however their religion pleases, and if it pleases them to define it as one man and one woman, that’s up to them.
The government doesn’t (or rather, shouldn’t) have the right to deny same-sex couples legal marriage benefits based on whether or not people think holy matrimony should be inclusive. Assuming you’re in the US, there’s kind of a thing about religion and government and how they should be separate written into our system.
Post # 6
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Two consenting adults who agree to love and trust one another and combine their financial and emotional resources to create a life together.
The two consenting adults part is the important part. It cuts out the ridiculous arguments against bestiality, pedophilia, and marrying your tv.
Honestly, when people are that ignorant I tell them to shut up and pretty much avoid them or cut them out of my life. I am almost 30 and have no need for friends or family members that spew horrible hateful BS.
Post # 7
@MrsPanda99: Google “separate but equal rights”, which was one of the concepts used in the 1950’s to justify segregation. Things are either exactly the same thing, or they are not. Gay couples do not want something that is “just like marriage.” They are fighting for actual marriage. Calling it anything else means it is not marriage and therefore, not the same thing. Creating separate but equal water fountains for whites and for blacks did not mean black people were any less segregated than when they had no water fountains, and creating a special “civil union” category for gay people and keeping marriage off-limits except for hetero folks will not extend equal rights to gay people.
@oracle: I would respond that the “one man, one woman” concept is largely created by religion, and that the Constitution (at least here in the US) should not be extending different rights to people based on their gender. Regardless of any religious feelings or beliefs, marriage is the right for two CONSENTING ADULTS to form a family unit of their own, to be responsible for and to one another, and that religious aspects have no place in discussions of legal rights.
Post # 8
I tell them that “salary” comes from “salarium” because soldiers were paid in salt. So unless they want to be getting paid in bags of morton, leave semantics our of the issue.
Post # 9
I’m so glad you asked! I have several friends who feel this way “Marriage is only between a man and a woman as it is defined in the Bible.” Disclaimer: Not saying all Christians feel this way–I, myself, am a Christian–just pointing it out. When people use that definition of marriage, they are coming from a Christian perspective. They believe it is a Christian/religious term that should only be used to describe unions between a man and a woman. To this, I respond that two atheists, Buddhists, etc. can be “married” as long as they are heterosexual. And point out that if the term really is a biblical one, it should only be used to describe Christian couples. Currently, it’s not used in that way, so their argument about it not being applied to same-sex couples is moot. It’s already a term that isn’t used in the way they think it is. I’ve actually gotten a few people really thinking about it with this viewpoint and a few of my friends have changed their minds.
Post # 10
@MrsPanda99: The point is that it shouldn’t be different. It should be equal. We are not less than and therefore do not deserve a less than definition or “name” for our equal union and committment. My wife and I are married… we had a wedding and a legal marriage (sadly in a different state), not a “committment ceremony”.
Post # 11
@fishbone: Ah. Makes sense. I was just curious if it was a legal rights issue, a semantics issue, or what. I’ve never had the opportunity to ask. Thanks for clarifying.
Post # 12
@lovebirds08: Makes sense 🙂 Does your state still recognize the union? I always wondered how that worked. For example, people used to always come to Canada for gay marriages and I wondered what happened when they went back to the US.
Post # 13
@SuspiciousCoconut: yes exactly!
As a Christian I want the legal marriage AND the religious matrimony. They are NOT the same thing!!
Post # 14
@Chrysoberyl: Yep. That’s one of the infographics I was specifically recalling. 😛
Post # 15
@MrsPanda99: Unfortunately no, it does not. But to us, we are not any less married and committed to one another.
Post # 16
@oracle: i have a very special place for this because my dad is gay…my parents were married for almost 20 years.
i love the arguement that people think that two women/two men that have children will turn out gay/lesbian.
i have 2 sisters and we are all straight.
i am also in a relationship of someone who is of a different race than i am. (he is filipino & i am white.) there was once a time where we would have not been legally allowed to marry because we are different races. cleary we have come far enough in the world to realize this is an “absurd” idea because aren’t we “all created equal?”
being gay is not a choice, you’re born the way you are whether its gay/straight/bi/tri/whatever.
i love my gay dad & i just want for him what i want for myself…to get MARRIED!!!