My first boyfriend was dramatic for me, but I was in high school and thought life ended at 17 when a boy breaks your heart. I didn't eat for 2 days, cried all the time, and couldn't sleep. It was awful and pitiful. I was not healthy.
If you can't sleep or when you do you wake up crying, that is the worst.
Symptoms of bad heartbreak? You can't sleep, you have no appetite resulting in not eating much for 2 months, you get depressed and think about dying, you feel like no one will ever love you again/you will never love anyone, you feel intensely nauseous with missing/hating/loving the person, the thought of not having their physical touch ever again makes you nauseous and teary, you can't concentrate. . . ack. I went through that my first semester in college. I was the thinnest I've been as an adult ever at that time and that whole suite of horrible things resulted in me becoming a very bitter, angry, and depressed person for a couple of years.
I do not recommend this! But sometimes it is inflicted on us by life. . . thankfully humans are really very resilient creatures. I am now a happy, reasonable woman who lives with the love of her life and thankfully hasn't had contact with that bad ex in years!
@Sheepshead: I usually can't sleep or eat much right after a break-up. Thoughts swirl around constantly in my mind much about everything that went wrong. I cry a lot; remind myself to "just breathe." It sucks to go through, but eventually the pain goes away.
Everything ok? Or is this just old memories?
@Sunfire: Oh yea - everything is fine. I was just thinking how horrible my breakup was over 2 years ago and was just wondering if anyone had the same kind of reaction.
Every breakup is different and everyone handles things differently.
I'm with the majority of PPs. Major depression mode which resulted in loss of sleep, barely eating (to which I also lost a good 15 pounds, bringing me to look very skeleton like), and in the party-mode (lots of drinking, going out, etc.). Shed a lot of tears when alone, and tried hard to be upbeat and fun when with others. Definitely the lowest point of my life to date for a good 2.5 months. And then DH came along and changed my life forever. <3
@Sheepshead: Pretty much what happened to me... my friends were really worried and forced me to go out... it's how I reconnected with my now SO.
Oh my, when my now fiance broke up with me a couple of years ago I lost 10 pounds because I hardly ever ate, was smoking cigarettes constantly, cried in my cubicle all day and watched nature shows constantly. The exotic animals comforted me. I was a mess. I did go out a lot, but when I look at the pictures from back then, I looked SOOOO sad.
Let's see - I cut my hair (not cut it myself, but went and got it cut) really short and dyed it blonde (not a good look on me!). There was other stuff going on in my life at the time of this breakup so I developed an eating disorder (of which I am now recovered). Went through a series of friends with benefits relationships because I didn't want to emotionally open up to anyone.
Then one day I woke up and said I don't want to be like this anymore and got my life back together.
In my last horrible breakup, I cried first thing in the morning, on and off all day, and cried myself to sleep at night. I couldn't eat anything and it took weeks for my appetite to come back. I lost 10 lbs (and I only weight 110 to begin with), it was gross. I was a miserable mess and all I wanted to do was talk to him or talk about him. I didn't want to be social and would cry when friends forced me to go out to dinner or out for an evening. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and watch shows on Netflix. And think about him. And did I mention the crying??? I think I cried more last year than I've ever cried in my whole life.
That was 6 months ago. I'm finally over it and have moved onto a much better place :)
I have cried, randomly, til my eyes were dry and scratchy, got nauseous and tossed my cookies (that happens to me when I cry really hard), slept nonstop, refused to get out of bed, shower, etc for a few days, and felt intense physical and emotional pain that I wouldn't wish on anyone.
@Sheepshead: To me, a horrible breakup was like the one I had with my ex. He was verbally abusive and would blame me if he had DREAMS about me cheating (which I never did). I FINALLY had the guts to break up with him but he wouldn't leave me alone. He actually came to my apartment and rang my doorbell for 6 hours straight!!!! I had to call the police on him. All my crying about him had been done over the years prior so I shed no tears when I finally broke it off. I actually felt a weight was lifted off me. I only wish I had had the self-respect and courage to break it off before 6 wasted years. I actually tried once, but he threatened to kill himself and even went so far as to climb over his apartment balcony and threaten to jump.
That break-up was horrible because it was like the break-up process lasted for 5 of the 6 years we were together, with him manipulating me to stay.
I lost 20 lbs and was my lowest weight since I was like 11 years old - 95 lbs. I cried ALL the time for about a month, every day for another two or three months, and at least once a week for another five or so months after that. I had nightmares every night for the first six months. I was just a big ball of emotion and it came spilling out all the time. I did party more than ever (which went from like zero partying to minimal partying, lol) because being with a ton of people so I always had someone to talk to was the best thing to distract me. I went on a lot of first dates and a few second dates but no third dates... no hooking up either because I just couldn't stand the thought of anyone with someone other than my ex (who, meanwhile, had started dating someone else immediately).
@newbabybee: I've been there ; ( its so horrible when you think of that person when you wake up and before bed and all day long and you replay the relationship over and over in your head trying to figure out what went wrong and then the pieces start to come together of when the relationship started to fall apart but you just did not see it but wow you see it now how could you have missed it but we all do caz we don't want to see it and then for about 6 months that's all you see is glimpses of things going wrong. i hate breakups and i'm so sorry your going Thur one. i hope you find a man that will sweep you off your feet.
Pray to God only he can help you True this that what i did thru my last break up i looked to God!
blessings i hope you heart and mind feel better soon!
@HisNightOwl2014: My relationship is doing just fine, but I was relying to another post. Thanks for your kind words though - I am sure if I was going thru a break-up what you said was very helpful. Your a very kind person. I have been thru a breakup long ago though and I knew when I woke up crying that that was a very bad sign of a bad break up. Thank goodness it only lasted a couple of nights - until I couldn't cry about it anymore. Made me grow up quick though.
I cried all the time and felt dead inside. It happened at the very beginning of my first real summer job, so I associated working/being there with pain. I was physically ill the whole summer. I could only eat ritz crackers for awhile. Not sure how much weight I lost because I didn't have a scale, it was my first year in college. Everyone was really worried about me though, family members I never talked to started sending me messages.
My ex-fiance was in the Marines (I was 18, and stupid). He had pretty much told me that he wanted to go on another date with a girl he worked with (while still dating me) to see how he felt. Now I look back and was like, "erm, why did this upset you?"
But at the time I was heartbroken. I didn't eat for days, I didn't sleep, I was sick all of the time. I was flat out depressed. I think I lost around 25 lbs that month just from the sheer stress of the break up. Of course, I now realize I was just a stupid teenager and that I deserved someone way better. But, in the end I got that "way better" and that's all that matters. Young and stupid I suppose, haha.
Feeling like a train hit you.
FI and I had a rough go at it the first year or so and broke up for about a month. I couldn't even deal. I never felt that way before.
@newbabybee: thank you hun im so glad everything is ok ; ) blessings!!! i pray to God i never go thru that again.
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For me:
Food had no taste for about a month, I was always nauseous, I lost 15lbs and was almost skeletal, I slept all day on my days off, I had to literally speak out the actions of what I was doing to keep from thinking about the heartache like "I'm going into the kitchen to get water."
I've had 4 longterm relationships end and only 1 yielded the breakdown mode which I described above. I'm just curious what others go through.