Post # 1
Those who have been there before me, I’m hoping you can help. We’re planning on having a summer wedding in Lake Tahoe, which is 4-5 hours from where we live (SF Bay Area), where most all of our friends and his parents are. It’s a destination wedding but not in the true sense of you have to fly to it. We’re picking between a number of venues that are on the border (we have 180 to invite if we invite everyone we’d like, and many of the venues max out at 125). I don’t want to invite more than we can hold, but am trying to find out if I should just give up the idea of the smaller venue/what the typical percentage non-attendance is for that type of scenario. The unfortuante part is with over 125 we really only have 2 venues we like, and they’re both very pricey with minimums of 130 needed to not essentially throw away money – so I’m trying to weigh all the pros and cons to decide what to do. I would love your input/advice/experience.
Post # 3
We got married in the town where we lived, where my immediate family lives. However, it was a destination wedding for all of my ILs as well as a good majority of the rest of our guest list.
We invited 350, with a HUGE majority of that being FI’s family that lives 6 hours away. I would not have invited them all, but my MIL insisted they must all be invited. We ended up with about 200 final people. The majority of his family (outside of immediate family and close relatives) did not attend. That being said, most of his friends (who are anywhere from 6-12 hours away) attended. We even had one set up friends fly across the country.
Generally speaking those who really want to be there and can financially afford it will be there.
Post # 4
@starfish0116: Thanks, that’s very helpful. Our family does not extend beyond aunts/uncles and cousins on either side so I’m guessing there’s a good chance a high number will attend. While the location is a bit pricey (it’s tourist season in Tahoe) I think a lot of people may see it as a mini weekend vacation and not having to pay for a flight helps. I think I’m going to play it safe … just in case. 🙂
Post # 5
EVERYONE, including us, had to drive at least 5 hours to our DW. Most spent 2 nights away from home.
72 were invited, and this includes everyone’s kids. 51 said yes (3 of those were no-shows). Most of the parents attending left their kids at home, so we ended up with just 5 little ones.
Overall, that’s a 71% “yes” rate, which was very close to our original estimate of 75%.
Post # 6
I’m not sure if this is helpful but I’m from the SF Bay (Oakland, baby!).
I would consider a wedding in Lake Tahoe a mini destination wedding. For me, anytime I have to drive 4-5 hours, I’m staying 1-2 nights and depending on the season it would be something I would have to plan in advance.
It’s difficult to know who will be there and who can’t make it. It would probably depend on how many have children (if children are not invited, especially), how many are elderly and would have to go drive in alone, etc.
Post # 7
@kristinh525: We actually live in a destination area, so it is a little bit of an expensive place to be. We did get married in the off season so that helped quite a bit. I forgot to mention, we had no kids at our wedding. I would venture to say that a good majority of them didn’t come because they did have little kids. We were going to actually pay for a sitter/food for all the kids but I think that we got married during a month where kids were in school played a huge factor in that. We only had one family who came w/ their kids (but used our refferal for a sitter) and they weren’t concerned about their kids missing school.
Post # 8
@kristinh525: I don’t know. Some people say 75% come, some say less and some say more. I’m still a year out but now that word is spreading, a LOT of people I thought wouldn’t fly out are indeed, planning to fly out. Yikes!