Post # 1
Having a destination wedding in Mexico. One of my bridesmaids is currently pregnant, and her due date is 2 months before our wedding. At first she declined, saying she didn’t think they would be able to make it. However, recently she has said that they may be able to attend, but they would know more closer to the day.
This puts me in an awkward position. The wedding is fast approaching, and we need to get bridesmaid dresses. WHat is the best way to handle this? Should I just assume she is not coming so I can get on with things? I feel like she is kind of holding my wedding process hostage. HELP!
Post # 3
@amanda2: I would still invite her. She should be relieved of her duties. If she can attend, she will attend as a guest.
Post # 4
@amanda2: why not just say, bm, we are cutting it close to the wedding. I would love to h e you but understand if you can’t I need to know by x date. obv say it in a nice way, but that’s the message.
Post # 5
I don’t know why you don’t just let her make this decision for herself. Is she your only bm? I would just pick the dress you want adn tell her if she wants to be in the wedding, she needs to order it by so and so date and if she doesn’t order it in time, she can either come as a guest or not come at all.
Post # 6
@futuremrsk18: I agree. Give her the dress, the date, and the option to get it or not. And then you will have your answer.
Post # 7
@futuremrsk18: +1 and if you’re worried about having even BMs and GMs, try not too. It’s not a big deal. I had 6 and 3! 🙂 Good luck!
Post # 8
@amanda2: Is she buying the dress? Are you? If the dress was purchased but she was not able to come and be in the wedding would it be a financial hardship for whomever is purchasing the dress?
I’d probably say “bm, I know things are unsettled right now, and I hope that you know that I want nothing more than to have you stand with me. I’m willing to have that be an unknown until the moment before I walk down the aisle. Unfortunately the dress decision needs to be made before that. Should we just assume due to the timing it’s unlikely you’ll be able to come and that if you come it will be easier to do that as a guest rather than a bm? Or should we order the dress and have it ready just so that if timing works out you can stand with the wedding party? I understand either way, but wo have a plan to move forward, what do you prefer?” by the end of the week we either purchase the dress (just in case) or decide that if you’re able to come it will be as a guest. Which do you prefer?”