(Closed) Destination vs Traditional — How did you choose?

posted 5 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
5243 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@kaytie327:  I always saw myself having a destination wedding so for me the choice was easy! I was also lucky my fiance saw the same vision as me and we were on the same page. For us it was also about budget…I knew we would never be able to afford a wedding here and didnt want to go into debt doing so. You have to decide whats best for you and your fiance. Alot of people on here are able to have an at home wedding on a limited budget  so it is doable.

Post # 4
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My DH and I always talked about getting married on the beach plus we wanted something very simple so a DW was all we ever truly considered.  As PP said, you have to choose what is right for you and FI.  You need to think about who you want at the wedding too and be prepared for ALOT of no’s.

Post # 5
Member
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@kaytie327:  I think the main thing is to do what YOU want to do. Figure it out by discussing it with your FI – not anyone else. Don’t let others’ opinions impact your decision.

Is a huge guest list important to you? If it is, it’s probably best to have a traditional wedding. If you’re happy with less people and a more intimate wedding, I’d go the destination route. Are there any family members you know won’t want to/or can’t travel that you really want there? Do you really want your family there for your honeymoon or could you move to a slightly different place after a few days? All things to consider.

On a $10K budget I’d probably go the destination route. You get a beautiful trip, simple but gorgeous ceremony, etc.

Post # 6
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

DW are generally cheaper than traditional weddings. but it depends whether you want to elope, or whether you want family/friends and if theyre in a position to go. A lot of brides plan their perfect DW, then are sad when people cant attend. The worst aspect of DW (for me) is that people can be super enthusiastic and then when crunch time comes…”oh we cant afford it”

For me, having a wedding in my hometown (london) would mean nobody on fi’s side could attend and it would cost the earth. Having a wedding where we live in Mexico would be a 300+ person extravaganza where i knew virtually no one (my worst nightmare). After checking with our family/friends, we decided on a small (by mexican standards) wedding of 100 people in cancun. The bonus is there is a direct flight london-cancun (to get where i live it involves a long transfer via US) and its a nicer, safer place than where i live

Organising DW can be more simple…or they can be more complicated. but they definitely arent as stress free as i expected haha

Post # 7
Member
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Congratulations on your engagement! We are doing a semi-destination wedding: in France, where I’m from, but 1000 km from here my family lives, so both our families have to travel. We are having a small wedding, so it was easy for us to decide what type of wedding to do.

As PPs have stated, the type of wedding you have will depend on the amount of guests you want, and also, you can definitley have a great at-home wedding for your budget, you just need to be creative.

 

I won’t bore you with my detailed budget, but I wish you the best time planning your wedding! And please keep us updated on your decision!

Post # 8
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

we originally wanted a DW but it all came down to Having people witness our marriage that have loved and supported our relationship from the start.   I coudln’t imagine getting married without my parents there, and they don’t fly, so they would never come to my DW.  

i only thought it was fair to include these people in our special day. 

Post # 9
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

We’ve always wanted a destination wedding because they’re more affordable, intimate and unique. Our family has convinced us to have a at home reception after the wedding as well. This will include a lot of DIY decor and just appetizers, so we can keep the costs down. This is something you may want to consider if you do choose a DW.

Post # 10
Member
1120 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

It was a no brainer for us as we both wanted a really small, stress-free wedding… We attended many weddings in the months leading to our engagement and all we could think about was how the bride and groom didn’t have time to spend quality time with their “important” guests because they had to entertain everyone, how we didn’t want to have to choose how to decorate the place and the menu and the music and… Well you get the picture. We wanted to get married but the idea of planning a wedding was appalling to us both, but we still wanted something more romantic than just going to the JOP.

We have absolutely no regrets and were able to keep it under 10K, including the price for the trip/honeymoon.

My advice to you is, this is your wedding, you only get one. So do what you want to do (within your budget of course): we get so scared of disappointing friends and family, but at the end of the day, you’ll remember your wedding day for the rest of your life, they will not.

Post # 11
Member
6 posts
Newbee

Im excited about the destination wedding. For those who I am not inviting to the wedding (this sounds harsh) Im going to have a nice engagement party, or maybe even a Bon Voyage Party. Then a couple days later leave for the for the ceremony with the invitees lol…Where are you all getting married??

Post # 12
Member
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My FI and I are not religious so we did not want a big church wedding. Most of our family & friends are in Indianapolis & Chicago (or close to there) so if we had a Cincinnati wedding (where we currently live) everyone would have to travel regardless. So we chose to have a wedding in Santa Rosa Beach, FL but not on the beach. Our venue is privately located on a bay. Our friends & family are very excited although my future inlaws were hesitant at first. Now they’re ready for a vacation & wedding!! We didn’t really factor in what our parents wanted bc it’s our wedding. We are in our late 20s so I think being a bit older helped us be more independent in our decisions of what WE wanted for our wedding compared to what others wanted us to do. 

Post # 13
Member
343 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I never personally saw myself having a big wedding, don’t like the attention nor can I appreciate the cost of everything in the wedding industry. 

Decided on a DW for the savings, I’d rather save for my future family.

Post # 14
Member
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I’m a very traditional bride, and I always thought I’d get married in a church, do the traditional Chinese tea ceremony (my dad’s family is Chinese), etc, with maybe 100 or so guests. But after months of planning for a big wedding (my dad’s family wouldn’t settle for anything less than 500 guests) and dealing with crazy extended family members who wanted everything their way, FI and I decided to have a small, intimate wedding – something we’ve always wanted – and are now planning a destination wedding. We haven’t regretted this decision since. The only thing that will probably be really challenging will be figuring out the guest list, but oh well…

Post # 15
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Really we chose a DW becaide what’s what I wanted! And he thought it would be fun to put everyone we love on an island . So we found the resort that fit and ans started the rolling. 

Post # 16
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - The bride's hometown United Methodist Church near Kalamazoo

We totally were caught between this decision, but we actually ended up going the opposite direction. Originally, I REALLY wanted a very SMALL destination wedding. I knew if we had a local wedding, it would open up a big can of worms guestlist-wise: not in a bad way, but we both come from HUGE close-knit families and it would be impossible to do a local wedding and invite less than 200 guests. However, when we thought about it, we really wanted to be able to celebrate with all our loved ones and knew we wouldn’t be happy if we left them all behind. Yes, our wedding is taking a lot more creativity–we still only have a $5,000 budget with our 200+ guests, so that means a lot of cuts, DIY, and creative thinking, but I definitely don’t regret it!

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