Post # 1
Hey Bees! Okay I have a question. Its only been a week since being engaged and well my FI and I were talking tonight and an old friend of his mentioned how she wanted an invite to the wedding and when I said how we should invite her, he mentioned how he wanted to do a destination wedding. I said I didn’t know anymore I mean It is a special day and I know I woud love our close friends and immediate family to be there.
I know its just the begining so we have alot to talk about and figure out. I’m in DC he’s in Canada and so I know my parents want the ceramony here which makes sense. However I do know we can try to do something here and then in Canda too. So what have you done for those married or in the proccess of getting married?
Destination or the latter? What are some of your stories?
Post # 3
We’re having a DW is Scotland – where FI’s family is. His parents aren’t well and couldn’t really travel here (I’m in DC too) so we decided to do the wedding there so they could attend. Being a DW, I wasn’t sure how many people would come, but ALL of the people who are most important to us are joining us. We invited about 115 and 68 are attending. Yes, not everyone is able to come to Scotland, but the ones that were crucial to us are coming.
What really helped make them decision for us was talking to the people that we REALLY wanted there. We asked them before looking at venues or anything if they thought they’d want/be able to attend. All those people that are the “I can’t get married without this person” types are attending.
Post # 4
@LilacandRoses: if having family and friends at your wedding is important to you, have your wedding local (in your case, something at each location).
dw are wonderful but you cannot expect people to come. it’s a big time and money commitment on someone. i know that a lot of people will say, “if they want to be there, they will”. yes, maybe, but a) are you willing to risk it and b) how much are you putting out your guests?
we have a home in the yucatan. my dh wanted us to have our wedding on our property. it’s lovely, on a quiet beach, coconut palms surrounds the perimeter. as pretty as it would be, i wanted my family with me. i couldn’t ask them to spend their hard earned money or vacation time just for me. it was easier to have our wedding near everyone and then everyone can attend (and they did).
Post # 5
@LilacandRoses: Congrats on your engagement! I’m in DC now too (need to update my profile :). My FI’s family is all in Turkey, and my family/our friends are all in the US… so we had some thinking to do as well. Since my FI’s family can’t travel to the US, we decided to do our legal “official” wedding over in Turkey next year. Of course it is open to any of our friends who would like to make the trip, but we aren’t really expecting any guests to come to Turkey besides my immediate family.
Our solution was to have an engagement party here in the US so we would have a chance to celebrate with all the people who wouldn’t be able to come to our wedding. We have planned it for this fall and we are treating it like our wedding reception (although it is happening before the actual wedding if that makes sense!) I’m glad we decided to do a separate party here in the US (my bank account doesn’t agree however)- I know most of our guests would never be able to come to a DW so far away!
Post # 6
@Glasgowbound: That is wonderful that you will have a good turn out and that all the crucial people you both wanted to come can make it! Good advice and I have to realize that everyone will have an opinon and that in the end its about what we both decide and what works for us. My FI said those that come will come and we have to figure out the details and where and what not. I figure if we did it in DC still the people on his side of the fence would be traveling regardless so I think it makes sense to find a place neutral. How long did it take to plan everything? I’m thinking a year or so timeline for us.
Post # 7
@mypinkshoes: Yeah that is a good point too. Its something where we will have to look at the pros and cons for each option. I guess either way his family and friends will be spending money to come to DC so in a way I can see where it makes sense to do it on the local side of the Bride and then have a party in Toronto and reception here. Hmmm alot to consider and think about.
Post # 8
@kestane: Hey awesome you are in DC too! Yes I know what you mean and well your FI family is in Turkey and that is nice you are able to do it there since his family can’t come to where you are. I mean I feel like having a party reception style even before the wedding is a great idea and then having a smaller intimiate ceramony in Turkey is nice. We haven’t picked the venue and I’m in the research proccess. He’s had his heart set on the DW and I”m torn cause I do want my closest friends there so its a balancing act we have to figure out since his feelings do count of course and I want us to be happy for our special day. Not sure of a date yet either but hoping to give this a year plan.
We also have to figure out moving wise as we decided to have me and my son move up to Canada and well not sure how all this will come together but it will it just takes time and paitience to figure it all out.