(Closed) DESTINATION WEDDING- SHOULD WE?

posted 7 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

That is tough.  I think it depends on how adamantly opposed your families are to the idea of a destination wedding.  You have to do what is right for you- whether that is keeping the peace with your families or having the type of wedding you really want.

As a compromise, have you suggested having a DW and then a reception/party back home for those unable to make it?

Post # 5
Member
138 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

It is indeed a really delicate situation. Last year I was going through a similar thing. We had our wedding in my home country. In our case, my husband’s sister and her family as well as his father and step mom did not attend. Also many of our friends – who initially said they were coming – ended up declining the invitation (some at the last moment). Every “no, sory, we can’t” hurt badly (now I realize, I kind of took it too personally). I was happy though that my closest friends came. In the end we had a beautiful wedding (I could say my dream wedding:)) and I wouldn’t change it at all.

I think you should ask yourself (or yourselves) who are the people you abloslutely want by your side at the wedding? Are these people willing to come? Then take it from there. 

Also, I love backyard weddings. They can be so wonderful and personal.

Or, are there lakes or natural settings resembling a beach in your area? This could be a nice compromise as well.

Post # 7
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

No matter what you do, there will be people that will be unhappy about your choice.
Would your rather have your parents unhappy or yourselves?

Will they come even if they criticize your choice? If the answer is yes, then I think, go for it if the most important people are there with you.

My mom and DH’s mom had a hard time with our decision. My mom spent a whole year trying to change my mind – what a fun year! But they came, and they had a blast, and my parents, who never travelled before, talk about going back all the time. Aunts and uncles had a problem with it and they did not come, but we are not close to them and wanted a very intimate affair, so we were happy about their decision. In the end, it was us, our parents and ciblings and a few very close friends and it was a dream.

The big problem is usually that they’re confronted with a new idea, but once they’re there, they won’t regret. Neither will you.

Post # 10
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

YEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!!! Do what YOU & YOUR FIANCE want to do!!

This is EXACTLY the same situation I had to go through.  His parents wanted the traditional church wedding with a big party afterwards.  They tried to tell us to go to the place we wanted to have the wedding afterwards for our honeymoon too.  And they almost had me convinced to through all my daydreams out the window.  But then my Mom told me, “DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO!! It’s YOUR wedding!!” The idea of a beach wedding was so different to them, they were very reluctant about it.  But in the end, they ended up loving it.  And all the ppl important to us made it to the wedding, and everyone agreed that we had made the right choice.  I’m so glad I did my beach wedding, I have absolutely no regrets!!

Here’s a pic!! Laughing

 

Post # 12
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Vintagequeen,

I looked up the Maggie Sottero Gatsby gown, that is going to look SPECTACULAR on the beach.  I love that sheer illusion train!!  That was one thing that I knew, I didn’t want to wear any plain, or simple, or short “beachy” dress.  I wanted a “real” wedding dress, although I was barefoot!!! Glad I could help out cuz these boards helped me so muchSmile

Post # 13
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I think that you should do what is best for you and your family.  I had a semi-destination wedding.  Meaning we all had to travel to get there.  For majority of us it was a 4-5 hour car ride and then for some a plane ride.  His entire side had to drive or fly regardless of if it was local or not.  We had a great turnout about 220 people we invited 450.  

Now the flipside… on our honeymoon we went to St. Lucia and there was a wedding everyday.  Yes they were beautiful but most of the couples were there alone, some might have only their parents there.  We actually were asked to join a couple at their wedding.  We met them on the first day of our honeymoon and they got married on the last day of our honeymoon.  Again it was pretty, but having witnessed it I felt sad that this couple had planned for 30 people to attend and only 4 showed up.  All of their friends who said they’d come backed out due to $ and other reasons.  So they asked us to attend because they had already paid for the 30 people and didn’t want the food to go to waste.  

 

I know that the above isn’t the case for everyone and some people are content to it just being the two of them.  But you need to decide if you are going to be sad that you didn’t have your bestfriend there or your Grandparents and other extended family.

Good luck, you’ll figure it out.  

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