Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?
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Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?
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Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?
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Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?

posted 2 years ago in Destination Weddings
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    1.
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    emaya77      

    My fiancé and I would like to take a destination wedding adventure, just the 2 of us. Originally we invited EVERYONE and gave a 2 years advance notice, but when it came down to deposits, our parents bailed (they thought most guests didn't have the $ and felt "trapped" into going and didn't feel it was fair for us to have the destination wedding so they told us they would not be going). We then didn't want to have the destination wedding with people but not our own parents. Now we would like to just go away ourselves because we do not want a big wedding (because of the size and price)...a destination was a way to solve these issues.

    I have been in a million weddings (always a bridesmaid never a bride - until now)...if we do go away just the 2 of us, can we still have a shower and reception afterwards? If so, is 6-8 months to late to hold these events? Can we make an announcement saying that we do not have the finances to have a wedding at the moment, but we would love to be married asap, so we are going away but would love to celebrate our marriage with friends and family once we get back and are financially able to hold a party? Or is bringing up finances not appropriate either? i just figure that this way guests know our "deal".

    Ahh...I am so confused and frustrated at this point. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

    Thanks!

     
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    Chela429    3/29/09   Long Island, NY

    Why not have a small ceremony and reception, and then renew your vows at your destination during the honeymoon!  It will create beautiful memories. 

     
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    emaya77      

    The problem is we can't have a small ceremony and reception for a few reasons...both my fiance and I grew up around here each went to a few colleges, we have kept in contact with so many friends from gradeschool - hs - college, he has a huge family, I have been in so many weddings that I can't not invite those friends. On top of that, we already invited EVERYONE - over 200 people to the destination wedding...we can't then say to some of those people "your not invited anymore" but then invite others. We just have so many people that are close to us.

     
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    Chela429    3/29/09   Long Island, NY

    I would get married at your destination of choice.  When you get back send out an announcement card.  People that want to gift you will do so when they receive the announcment, but asking people to throw you a shower may be too much.  However if you throw a party at a later date to celebrate your marriage, many people will also gift you at that time.

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    emaya77      

    So, you don't think it's tacky to throw a party later even though no one actually witnessed our marriage?

     
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    Chela429    3/29/09   Long Island, NY

    It's a celebration!  I love any excuse to party!  I'm sure your friends will want to too!  Just because they didn't witness it doesn't mean that you can't get eveyone that cares about you to come together to share in your joy.

     
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    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    Here's my comment from the d.w. board (this post has a duplicate i guess?)

    Sure, you can have a reception. Lots of folks call this a "hometown reception". Mr. MJ and I are having one a few days after our very private wedding.

    My friend and her hubby were married in St. Thomas (Virgin Islands) in January with just family, but didn't have a reception back at home until May. I didn't think anything of the delay.

    As far as a shower? That's really up to those close to you. Generally friends, bridesmaids or relatives throw one for you.

     

     
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    emaya77      

    I could see having a reception after the private ceremony if it was very small with just parents, I just wonder if it's still ok if it's just Mark and I...cause it's sort of like eloping in a sense, ya know?

     

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