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Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?

Destination with just the 2 of us,can we still have a shower & reception?

posted 2 years ago in Destination Weddings
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    1.
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    emaya77      

    My fiancé and I would like to take a destination wedding adventure, just the 2 of us. Originally we invited EVERYONE and gave a 2 years advance notice, but when it came down to deposits, our parents bailed (they thought most guests didn't have the $ and felt "trapped" into going and didn't feel it was fair for us to have the destination wedding so they told us they would not be going). We then didn't want to have the destination wedding with people but not our own parents. Now we would like to just go away ourselves because we do not want a big wedding (because of the size and price)...a destination was a way to solve these issues.

    I have been in a million weddings (always a bridesmaid never a bride - until now)...if we do go away just the 2 of us, can we still have a shower and reception afterwards? If so, is 6-8 months to late to hold these events? Can we make an announcement saying that we do not have the finances to have a wedding at the moment, but we would love to be married asap, so we are going away but would love to celebrate our marriage with friends and family once we get back and are financially able to hold a party? Or is bringing up finances not appropriate either? i just figure that this way guests know our "deal".

    Ahh...I am so confused and frustrated at this point. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

    Thanks!

     
    2.
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    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    Sure, you can have a reception. Lots of folks call this a "hometown reception". Mr. MJ and I are having one a few days after our very private wedding.

    My friend and her hubby were married in St. Thomas (Virgin Islands) in January with just family, but didn't have a reception back at home until May. I didn't think anything of the delay.

    As far as a shower? That's really up to those close to you. Generally friends, bridesmaids or relatives throw one for you.

     
    3.
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    joyofweddings       Cayman Islands

    Even if it's only the two of you that doesn't mean your wedding day can't be special and memorable.  I don't think there's any moratorium on when you have the reception.  I perform many weddings for just the couple and the required witnesses, and most of them are planning a party afterwards when they get home.  It will be up to you to provide the link between the wedding and the reception, many brides use photos to do this, and some have a themed reception.  For example if you got married on a beach somewhere you could do a reception with a beach theme.

     
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    quiche    May 2, 2009   Chicago

    You can definitely have a shower and reception!!  Go for it & have fun :)

     
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    Blushing bee
    hugrad    8.9.10   Alexandria, VA

    I have been thinking of doing the same thing. It just seems easier and more intimate.

     
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    kay    9-22-09   Sierra Madre, ca

    You can have it all!!  My fiance and I are getting married in Negril, Jamaica at the Sandals Negril Resort, just the two of us, beautiful, intimate, a small reception (just the two of us) with a cake, our first dance, everything!!  Very reasonable!!!  They provide everything!!  Then....we are having a reception when we return home with all of our family and friends!!  Having a wedding just for the two of us is the best decision in the world.  It really becomes what it should be...exchanging vows with the one you love, shared only between the two of us.  So often the bride is exhausted, has spent so much time planning and concentrating on everyone else, all of the drama etc., and she doesn't even get to enjoy it.  To me...this is the perfect way to go!!!

     
    7.
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    IA_Snowflake    August 29, 2009   Missouri Valley, IA

    Of course you can have a reception later.  I'd announce the marriage when you get married and let people know there will be a reception later.  As far as the shower, of course you can have it, but generally someone close to you throws it, so it's up to them.

     
    8.
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    bellenga    July 31, 2010   Georgia

    Absolutely you can have a reception!  And you can even invite your minister to re-affirm your vows w/loved ones there so they can "feel" it even more or what I think is fun...SHOW THE VIDEO on a large screen of your marriage first and then have the minister/friend re-affirm those vows and then let the party get started!

    I think that would be a fun twist and a reason to wear your gorgeous wedding dress a SECOND time!!!  Get your moneys worth out of it!

     
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    Juliemd414    7/25/09   STL

    You can do whatever you want!!  I went to a reception that was months after the couple's destination wedding and it was great!!  None of the guests thought it was weird and we all had a great time!

    You could send out an announcement announcing your "private" destination wedding and reception to be held in your home town or where ever you want.

     

     
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    BeachyBride2010    Jan, 2010   Jamaica

    WE are having an at home (litterally in our yard) 6 months after our winter wedding in Jamaica.  This will be a time for all who opt not to spend the time, $ etc to join us in the Caribbean.  Additionally it will be the ceremony/party where our kids will participate.  Bringing teenagers on our honeymoon doesn't really work for us, they'll be involved in our summer festivus, and we'll have the tropical relaxing honeymoon sans kids. 

     
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    JamaicaBride    May 14, 2011   Charlotte, NC

    My fiance is planning our destination wedding to Jamaica for this December (I am so lucky). I wanted a beach wedding and he wanted an intimate wedding so we merged the two and deciced to go the destination route. He is planning everything (except for my wedding ensemble of course) and even the resort we will be staying at will be a secret (although a little birdie told me Royal Plantation in Ochos Rios). We are having some really nice picture wedding announcements made and sent out once we are back and his parents will be throwing us a small reception when we get back. While both sets of parents/families are kind of disappointed that we didn't go the traditional route...they understand and have been really supportive of us having the wedding WE want.

     
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    jspeby    July 17, 2011   new york

    Of course you can have a shower and reception!! It's your day! My cousin and her FI went to vegas and got married, just the 2 of them. We didn't know till we get the pictures emailed to us. She's had her shower a few months after and is planning the reception. We want to be there for her and celebrate this part in her life. I cant wait for the reception.

    Don't stress too much about it. You can totally pull it off!

     
    13.
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    Amanda_B       Hawaii

    Of course you can !    

     
    14.
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    aplusb       Washington, DC

    @JamaciaBride - I am OBSESSED with Royal Plantation!  I want to go so much!  We're doing Hawaii as our honeymoon, and I'm planning on putting the bug in the ear early about Royal Plantation as our babymoon down the road ;-)

     
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    DreamComeTrue    06-25-2011   Silver Spring MD

    I deffinately think a reception later will be awesome for the two of you, friends, and family! At the end of the day people who love you just want an opportunity to celebrate with you! Like JA bride said, I think it would be nice to send marriage announcements with a picture from the wedding as an invitation to the at home reception! 

    @ JA bride that is totally romantic and special!!! I love JA my girls and I go every year!

     

     
    16.
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    JamaicaBride    May 14, 2011   Charlotte, NC

    @aplusb....I am obsessed with Royal Plantation too. I can't even count the number of times I have been to that site. I am pretty sure that's where we will be getting married b/c I was also obsessed with the Preston Bailey wedding packages...LOL! My FI said I would be very please so Royal Plantation and Preston Bailey would be very pleasing indeed....LOL! 22 more days...

     
    17.
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    JamaicaBride    May 14, 2011   Charlotte, NC

    In case anybody wants to view the fabulousness that is Royal Plantation, Ochos Rios

    http://www.royalplantation.com/gallery.cfm

     
    18.
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    firsttimebride85    March 23, 2011   North Myrtle Beach

    No matter how UNIQUE the situation is (mine is just as unique) This may sound rude but I'm just giving my opinion.....unless you have a TRADITIONAL WEDDING then you OPT OUT OF ALL SHOWERS INVOLVED because it appears VERY TACKY and looks like you are begging for money & gifts. If you just send out wedding announcements the day you get married then people in your family and/or friends will get you miscellanous items ie. money and/or gift cards and may possibly ask if you are registered somewhere which if you aren't that clearly means you want money and/or gift cards which is okay too. If you want to avoid people thinking you guys are just "gift grabbing" then you have a housewarming party and register somewhere and put that registry information on your housewarming invitations :)

     
    19.
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    firsttimebride85    March 23, 2011   North Myrtle Beach

    No matter how UNIQUE the situation is (mine is just as unique) This may sound rude but I'm just giving my opinion.....unless you have a TRADITIONAL WEDDING then you OPT OUT OF ALL SHOWERS INVOLVED because it appears VERY TACKY and looks like you are begging for money & gifts. If you just send out wedding announcements the day you get married then people in your family and/or friends will get you miscellanous items ie. money and/or gift cards and may possibly ask if you are registered somewhere which if you aren't that clearly means you want money and/or gift cards which is okay too. If you want to avoid people thinking you guys are just "gift grabbing" then you have a housewarming party and register somewhere and put that registry information on your housewarming invitations :)

     
    20.
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    malisa0607    May 6, 2012   Denver, wedding in Las Vegas

    i say yes to recception but no to shower.

     
    21.
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    2bMrsG    October 13, 2011   Pittsburgh, PA (Las Vegas Wedding)

    Yep, you can have both! I don't see why not. My FI and I are getting married in Vegas, just the 2 of us for the same reasons really and our good friend is throwing us a shower 2 months before and my FI's Mom offered to throw us a reception about 1 week after we return since we really don't have the money for a reception at all. 

     
    22.
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    Helper bee
    MissMaryMc    September 22, 2012   Washington, District of Columbia

    I agree, yes to reception, no to showers.

    Everyone attending the showers are suppsoed to also be invited to your wedding. So if you're not having guests at your wedding...then there shouldn't be a shower.

     
    23.
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    Sugar bee
    meerkat    December 14, 2010   Riviera Maya, MX / Kalamazoo, MI

    @firsttimebride85: I would like to respectfully disagree. I had not one but two showers and both sides our family said how happy they were that we did them. Because most of them were unable to come to the wedding, this was a way for them to celebrate with us. No one thought we were gift grubbing.  

    We are also having a at-home reception which people are SUPER excited about. I told our families that we were not expecting gifts and to please pass the word along. EVERY responce has been that people want to get us gifts. Maybe our families different but for them it is a way to celebrate and feel like they were part of the celebration.

     

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