Post # 1
So, I’m wondering how all of you ladies would react to this?
My DH and his friends from high school always joke about each other’s wives or girlfriends not letting them go out (to hang out, have drinks, etc). They’ve always joked about it and I’ve come to realize it has nothing to do with myself or any of the other SOs, so I don’t really care. I think it’s dumb, but whatever.
Today my DH was making plans with a friend and they began joking about this as usual. Finally my DH said to his friend that he would “whip me” if I didn’t let him go out and that he needed to “teach” this to the other friends.
My initial reaction was shock – I couldn’t believe he said that!
I know my husband would never “whip” me (!) or hurt me in any way. He has never been physical, that’s not even a concern. I know this was just a joke. I know his friend knows that as well.
But how would YOU react to a joke like that?
I feel like it kind of crossed a line, but I also know that guys are so different than women and what’s funny to them may not be funny to us. It was just the two of them, so it’s not like he blurted it out in front of a whole group of people.
I guess what I’m wondering if there are other ladies that would just shrug this off as immature male humor? I’d feel better knowing others would just consider it a joke and move on.
Post # 3
Wouldnt care. We joke like that all the time.
Post # 4
I’d shake it off 🙂 It’s not like he said it to anyone who thought it might not be a joke (or worse, actually meant is seriously).
If I were really offset, in the moment I might say lightly “Be nice!” or “Oh man, that one was harsh!” but I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it.
Post # 5
I have to be honest, I find that odd. I would be pissed if my SO said that to his friends, because it seems very disrespectful. I know my SO jokes with his friends about how annoying women are or whatever, but “whip” seems a bit strong. Obviously to your SO it means nothing, but if it were me, I would nicely ask him to please not say that to his friends, and leave it at that.
Post # 6
Boys being boys. No problem.
EDIT: Though on further reflection, it could be seen as joking about domestic violence, which is a bit off.
Post # 7
@shakeitoff: I’m not a fan. It’s clearly a joke, but it’s not a good one.
Post # 8
We both joke around like this, I would probably roll my eyes and move on with my day.
Wow, ladies on this site seem pretty touchy about their men… Seems like a difficult way to live.
Post # 9
IDK, I expect my fiance to back me up and support me and say how amazing I am to everyone and not shit on me at every chance he gets. I feel like jokes have some sort of truth to them and that if he joked about me not letting him go out, it’s probably because he actually felt that way and I’d get pissed. I don’t buy the whole guys get married to a ball and chain thing and it’s fun to joke about and blah blah. No, I’m an amazing girlfriend, fiance, wife, whatever and I never talk shit about him to my friend. So, yeah, I’d be pissed that any of this was going on. At. All. Maybe I’m uptight, IDK..
ETA: Jokes are meant to be funny. This isn’t funny. It’s stupid, immature, ignorant. I just expect more out of my FI than to behave like this. Sometimes he jokes about not getting laid enough and it really pisses me off – I told him and he stopped doing it.
Post # 10
I would pick my battles… this doesn’t seem serious at all. If anything, I’d just say something like “Yea please whip me. I’ll bring the gimp mask and call u my daddy” and we could all have a laugh 🙂
Post # 11
I would take it as a joke. I threatened fi all of the time. “I will beat you if you don’t drop the photographer deposit in the mail” lol. Clearly I’m kidding so we just laugh about it. If what he says is making you uncomfortable then talk to him about it.
Post # 12
My FI and I joke like this all the time, but we have the exact same sense of humor.
Post # 13
Personally, I would take it as a joke. That said, my dad was golfing with his niece’s husband last Easter and the husband made a joke about “having to put the smack down on” niece. Yeah. Dad knows this guy would NEVER really hurt his niece but he was NOT pleased with the joke. Apparently his face said it all and the husband started stammering and apologizing. 😛 So… I totally get if YOU don’t like YOUR man joking like that. I would just tell him calmly that you don’t mind the “old ball & chain” kind of jokes, but you’d prefer he not joke about getting physical with you. Totally understandable.
Post # 14
I’d be shocked if I ever heard him say anything like that. I’d probably raise my eyebrows and say” seriously??” to gently let him know he maybe crossed the line.
Post # 15
Honestly, I would have jumped in and one uped him! I wouldn’t take it personally.
Post # 16
@shakeitoff: Just laugh it off of react with a little comment, always with humor that he will know what a good wip is if he speaks like that again..just be funny and take it from who it comes. The man you love. you can always say…Babe dont go to far…but dont make a big deal out of it.