DH told me we are TTC?

posted 3 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
34 posts
Newbee

@dannielle89:  I know what you are saying – but you should also consider the fact that when you are not using any form of birth control, its a risk youre taking. Pulling out is just about as ineffective as ejaculating inside and should not be considered a “method.”

Post # 4
Member
435 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

@GingerSweepea:  It’s actually no where near as ineffective, if done properly and with good control.

 

 

@dannielle89:  That is something my DH would have done… men Tongue Out

Post # 5
Member
34 posts
Newbee

@abc123joanna:  I am going by the studies I have read in my Human Sexuality course in Uni…. Although it CAN work, it is still fairly ineffective due to pre-ejaculate and lack of other form of birth control

Post # 6
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

@GingerSweepea:  The pull-out method almost rivals condoms when done correctly (ie: no “oopsies” like OP had!) so that statement is false.

Post # 7
Member
312 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@dannielle89:  If you don’t want to be pregnant, can’t abide hormones, and your hubby can’t keep it up when wearing a condom, you might want to consider a copper IUD. They’re non-hormonal and extremely effective in preventing conception. Otherwise, if y’all are having unprotected sex and he’s okay with not pulling out in time (as he proved last night), I predict you’ll be preggers within the year!

Post # 8
Member
34 posts
Newbee

@NotTheDoctor:  I am simply stating what I have read in APA journals through my studies, my statement is not false. I had mentionned that it CAN work, however can be ineffective due to pre ejaculate…. that is not false – it is common sense. I just dont want anyone getting knocked up because they are ill-informed. YES pulling out CAN work, however should not be used as a sole form of BC.

Post # 9
Member
3014 posts
Sugar bee

@GingerSweepea:  I worked perfectly for us for a full year. Then we had completely unprotected a few times and I got pregnant. I am fertile and somehow it worked for us. 

My BFF had the same experience. If the man is skilled at timing, it will work. 

Post # 10
Member
1487 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@mamadingdong:  yup. Worked for 4 years for us to the point where I wondered if we had fertility issues. But nope! I got pregnant the first time.

Post # 11
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

@GingerSweepea:  

Pulling out is just about as ineffective as ejaculating inside and should not be considered a “method.”

You read this in a peer-reviewed medical journal? I think not. I have a (biology-based) neuroscience degree and have also read a ton of scientific articles on the subject – since it’s the method my SO and I use. Don’t pull the “I went to college, so there” attitude, it’s yucky. I don’t disagree that people who want to 100% guarantee that they don’t conceive should not solely use this method, but all methods except abstinence are fallible.

Post # 12
Member
2052 posts
Buzzing bee

@dannielle89:  First of all-I agree with you 100%.  Trying to have a baby together when your main method of BC is the pull out method, well, you have to be VERY careful and if he wants a baby he should be vocal so the two of you can talk about it.

2nd of all-and bear with me here-his statement is kinda sweet and compassionate.  I am in a relationship where I am on the pill, we use protection and pull out depending on the heat of the moment…and my SO has made it very clear that he if an accident happens, he would expect me to terminate the preganacy, and makes constant comments that ‘women set up men all the time’.  hmmm.  It’s been 3 years and I do somewhat share my SO’s views on having a baby out of wedlock (many stories in my family exist of women getting pregnant on purpose to trap men, that maybe the men didn’t even want to be with them UGH), however, if I were to get pregnant on accident, because the TWO of us were having consentual sex, well, I would be afraid to tell him because he woult NOT be as easy going as your DH.  

I am not saying that your DH is right in his approach-or that my advice is right or anything-but I would think that having a man in my life who might say ‘this is okay if it happens, I love you, let’s deal with it then’ is better than ‘women set up men, don’t have an accident…’ which causes WAY more anxiety for me if I am even 3 HOURS late hahahaha.  

Good luck!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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