DH wants to leave his job

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3955 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

What does he have in mind for his next step?  Is he going back to school, or will he be looking for a less stressful job?  It’s wonderful that you are supportive!

Post # 4
Member
42522 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I guess I come from  a more old-fshioned upbringing. I was taught that you stay with the job you have until you have another one.

As a single parent, you do not have the luxury of indulging yourself to make a decision to leave a job and have no income. Not so good for the kids to just say ” I wasn’t happy in my job.”

Post # 6
Member
849 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@O.My.Heart:  Job dissatisfaction can be so traumatizing. I once had a job where each morning I’d feel the bile rising in my throat and I would have sweaty palms and be terrified of going in because of all the drama and backstabbing in the office. I am a level sort of person and I avoid histrionics so this really had me at breaking point.

Good call lady, something else will come along you’ll see. Be brave.

Post # 7
Member
13020 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

My husband want’s to leave his job too and find greener pastures.  But… I guess I’m not as nice as you.  He’s not leaving until he has something lined up, and if he has to take a pay cut, we will be discussing it and deciding it together.  There’s bills to be paid and a retirement to save for, so the numbers will decide.  I mean, I hate working too, but life requires money.

Post # 8
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@O.My.Heart:  Unhappy or not, people have responsibilities and money is required to meet many of them. If he didn’t have you to depend on financially would quitting his job before he has found another still be a priority? Or would he, in fact, suck it up until he finds something else?

Most of us don’t like our jobs. If it was supposed to be fun, they wouldn’t call it work. If someone is that unhappy then I absolutely support that they should find a new role. However, you don’t leave your current one until a new one is secured.

Post # 9
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I completely understand and hope your husband finds another job he likes soon.

I’m giving my notice tomorrow and can’t hardly wait!  I will be transitioning into something else (working for myself), which is a risk, but well worth it…

Best of luck.

Post # 10
Member
4513 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’d be fine with my FI leaving his job as long as he had another one lined up. I agree that being miserable at work can be detrimental, but you also have to pay your bills. Sure you can’t get your time back and money is just money, but that concept would be going out the window if our home was foreclosed upon!

In this economy I just don’t believe anyone should be quitting any job unless they already have another offer. I also think that my FI quitting would be really unfair to me and put a lot of additional pressure on my life.

Post # 11
Member
11300 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

We went through this a couple of years ago. I was finishing my degree and DH was working an assembly line. He’d quit his long-term retail job to work at this company, was promised a whole bunch of things, and got lied to and treated horribly. His depression was at the worst I’ve ever seen it, and he only worked there for three months. He tried to hold out, he really did, because they kept promising he’d get hired in with a raise, benefits, and promoted ASAP, and then he had his progress meeting with his supervisor and recruiter from the temp agency. Supervisor ripped into him, called him worthless and saying that he brought the whole team down (absolutely lies, since his numbers were the best on the team and everyone loved him). Then they said the company was on a hiring freeze and wouldn’t be hiring anyone in for a long time. We finally sat down and looked at our expenses and decided that we’d be okay for a couple of months until I graduated, if need be. He tried to get the temp agency to place him elsewhere before he quit, but they refused. They told him he’d have to put in his notice before they’d even look (more lies), and then when he did, told him they couldn’t find anything.

We managed, it was fine, and we survived. I got an okay job (pay-wise, no benefits, shitty environment) and he went back to school. I got laid off of that job and picked up another one (better environment, pay cut, still no benefits) and he picked up a part time job to help pay for the wedding (which he’s still at for now–once I get a better, full time job, he can quit).

Post # 12
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee

@O.My.Heart:  Nope. The summer after we started dating, my FI and I were on vacation. When we finally got to where we had internet and cell coverage (still 1 week until we’d be home), he checked his email and voice mail. There was some shitty emails from his boss, and he called his office. His boss told him he had to be back “tomorrow” to sort stuff out (not his mess mind you).  He apologized, told him there was no possible way, and that was that.

That evening, he pulled out his laptop and started typing his resignation letter. The next morning before we pushed off the dock, he emailed it.

He chilled for a while, picked up some odd jobs, taught sailing lessons. He was determined that he never wanted another job that required him to wear a suit or tie or sit at a desk (for most of his working life he ran his own company, which he sold several years before we met), so he found a job at a sail loft and has spent the past 3 years playing boats and being mostly happy.  Which makes me happy!

Post # 13
Member
3424 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

You are awesome. Sometimes your time is more valueable then the money.

Post # 15
Member
7098 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Maybe I’m a mean wife but I would insist he had something lined up before quitting. The job market sucks and it’s not that crazy for people to go a year+ without finding a new job.

Post # 16
Member
1472 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My DH just took a rather large pay cut to get out of a toxic work environment and I fully supported it. It will take him about 3 years to be back up to earning what he was, but he will also end up with far more opportunities. 

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