Post # 1
HI EVERYONE! 😀
I always seem to have the worst time trying to figure these little etiquettes, so I turn to you!
My DH got laid off at his old job, BUT now he’s volunteering at a legal aid place!! He’s been there for a little over a month. A woman slighly older than us at his job gave him an envelope sealed with her baby boy’s picture and a party invitation for his 3rd birthday. It’s SUPER cute. . .but. . .
The thing is. . .we don’t have any kids. I haven’t met his co-worker yet, and neither of us have met her son. I asked DH if his co-worker was expecting an RSVP from both of us and he said he couldn’t imagine his co-worker not expecting him to bring his wife. So it sounds like the co-worker knows we’re married, and therefore assumes we have children?
I’m unsure how to go about handling this. I particularly would not enjoy spending time at a children’s party if all invited individuals were expected to bring their own children, or at least know the child whose birthday it is (like true family and friends). Help! :O
Post # 3
Awkward. I’d just RSVP no and say you’re busy.
Post # 4
@LittlePumpkin: Yeah I wouldn’t go to a kid’s party unless it was a kid I knew personally. She may assume (stupidly) that you have children. I’d RSVP no.
“Thank you so much for the invitation but we are already booked that day” (and by booked I mean cuddling on the couch naked cause we don’t have kids).
Post # 5
Some families make a big deal about children’s birthdays and invite many adults. It wasn’t part of my upbringing, nor that of my kids. We always celebrated birthdays with family only on the exact day, and when they were old enough a party with the number of their friends equal to their age on the closest Saturday.
I would simply decline and would not send a gift. Even if you had kids, I wouldn’t take them to a party for a child they did not know.
Post # 6
I even have a kid, and I still wouldn’t go. AWKWARD!
I would politely decline.
Post # 7
I would probably decline but give her a gift for her son!
Post # 8
I don’t think it’s a big deal. I think it was nice of her to invite you two (maybe she invited everyone in the office and didn’t want to leave anyone out). But if you don’t want to go, then politely decline.
Post # 9
She may have invited the families in the office and then felt like she should invite everyone. I would say you guys are busy that day but send along a small gift like a book.
Post # 10
I called my hubby and it sounds like she may or may not know he’s married. She supposedly knows “we” don’t have any kids. I told him since this is the case, it’s quite a bit awkward that I don’t know her and we don’t have any kids. He couldn’t see how it would be awkward for me, because it wouldn’t be for him since he “knows” her. I told him that since it’s a kid’s party. . .what on Earth are we going to do for our entire duration at the party? I’m quite unsure how that wouldn’t be awkward in the slightest for him, too.
Post # 11
I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that she was inviting other coworkers, and even though your DH is new and you don’t have any children, she wanted to be polite and offer. I think it’s totally fine to say “no.”
Honestly, if I had kids, I’d probably go to give them the chance to meet someone new and have fun. But I also generally like birthdays.
Post # 12
I’m sure she had invited other co-workers to the party. I asked him if the office was invited and he told me that so and so wasn’t invited. Well, that doesn’t mean that he didn’t get an invitation earlier or that others did not get an invitation as well.
Post # 13
Your husband is probably the best one to figure out the dynamic. Personally I have been invited to the b-day party of a co-worker’s child. It never occured to me that it was strange. I was not the only one without a child who attended.
Post # 14
This is very common in some cultures. A kid’s birthday is just a good excuse to throw a big party. Everyone in the neighborhood would be invited and pretty much the mailman and the lady from the coffee shop too. Plus extended family and tons of old and new friends. Go if you want, or decline if you want.
Post # 15
@LittlePumpkin: RSVP no and send a little gift or card with 10-20 buck in it.