- 4 years ago
I set up a new account for this. DH and I have been married for 3 years. 3 1/2 years before he had gone through a horrid divorce from 1st wife.
DH was also my DH FI when I was in my twenties. We were teenage sweet hearts together for a 5 years. I broke off our engagement because I felt too young to get married but never because I didn’t love my now DH. We were still talking for a few years but then stopped talking when DH started dating what became his first wife so he could go on with his life since I wasn’t ready to settle down.That is really just background to set the stage that I am his wife but I was also his ex FI (think the notebook)
They had a child and I have a child by another relationship in between.
Anyhow she left him after 10 years of marriage for another man who she marriaged and then divorced. During the divorce she did everything in her power to hurt my DH. Tried to keep him from his child multi times. Lied about her income. Would call his parents and lie about him. All the while she was the one who left DH for a man she was having an affair with moved right in with other guy and then married him within months of the divorce being final.
DH found me again after he looked me up on FB and sent me a message just to say hi. He was already divorced and I wasn’t with my child’s father anymore. Well it didn’t take long before we got back together. We then got married finally decades after we were first engaged.
Fast forward. Life is pretty good. But the stuff from ex wife is always all over the map. Often it is calling him ever name in the book trying to take us to court for more money. Forwarding texts to me (like he doesn’t show me what he sends her) ect. But starting 2 years ago any time she is single she will hit on him (often within a week of calling him a useless human). She has left songs on his phone like 3 times. Well recently she basically jumped off the cliff. She started with link to a song. DH showed me his phone and I said she is in one of her moods. She had been in a serious thing (again) so I added the guy must me out of the picture.
It escalated from the song.
My hubby was sitting next to me the whole time and letting me read every crazy word of it.
Then it was “we miss you”
Then it was we didn’t try hard enough to save our marriage. He was like umm what do you mean we. That one made me laugh she chetaed on her hubby and then tried to destroy him in divorce / keep his child from him so she could marry green pastures. But she thinks they didn’t try hard enough.
He told her that I love him for him and he loves me for me.
Worst thing was she was also envoking thier child though out. “we need you, we miss you”
She said she was having 16 year old read the texts which is SO wrong and munipltive towards the child. The child knows thier dad loves them and so do I.
But it got worse over the two hours it went on. She started saying come home to your wife.
To which my husband finally explained he hated her for all she had done to him and she needed to stop. That even if he wasn’t happily married to me (which he is) that he would never be with someone who proved she was horrid to him.
Her reponse was to say he needed to come home to his wife.
Finally he just texted stop.
He also texted his child through out to make sure his child was ok. It was clear she was sharing the texts or some of them with the child.
I feel so bad for DH because her lack of remorse and sense of entitlement just goes to show that she doesn’t care about anyone but herself.She is known for using people and we had heard she was having money problems and was leaning on her BF for help. I figure the BF must have decided he had enough so she figured she would get my DH to take care of her again since he is a great guy that she didn’t deserve.
I only shared this to vent. Since I am still floored as to how someone has so little self respect to act this way. I am also talking myself out of telling her what a piece of trash she is acting like and how shameful it is to do that in front of her child. Also she put him through heck so last thing he deserves or needs is her putting him through more.
The day after it happen my DH thanked me for being so helpful and supportive when dealing with her awful behavior. He said it was a huge reminder for him how much he loves me and I love him. So if her intent was that my hubby was going to up and leave his wife to return to a woman who emotionally abused him all she did was show just how little she thinks of him. She also added to our bond to each other.
Would love to here if other people have dealt with crazy ex years after thier divorce or years after you and your DH got married.
Thanks ladies for letting me vent