Did any of you have someone that you didn't want to in your wedding list?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
825 posts
Busy bee

Yup. 2 in our wedding party and many more on the guest list. 

I think that’s the case with most (if not all) weddings. 

Post # 5
Member
774 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@lovelyinside:  I think it’s a pretty standard thing. FI has a few friends who I find annoying but he wanted to invite. There are family members I have to invite out of necessity although I have no relationship with them. It’s par for the course. 

Post # 6
Member
2515 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@lovelyinside:  ugh yes, basically my FI family’s friend’s son..They have two kids- one ( daughter-my FIs age). The parents are invited, the daughter is invited so I think we ‘have ‘ to invite the son ( he is in mid 20s, still lives at home)

I don’t want to. I do not like him, and have NEVER met him sober ( I am friendly with the sister and her hubby so we see the brother from time to time) . I swear every time I see this kid he is wasted. Not drunk, WASTED. And he acts totally inappropriate when shitfaced ( I am no teetolar but to have never met someone sober in almost 4 years is pretty bad)

I am trying to have him not be invited but I am pretty sure it will offend Fi family friends…ugh

Post # 7
Member
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

My Bridesmaid’s husband. I mean obviously I have to invite him but he creeps me out. He’s been arrested, he’s socially withdrawn, he gets insanely jealous..I just don’t want to have to worry about him. Like I’m worried he’ll get pissed at her for walking down the aisle with a groomsman. He got mad at her at their rehearsal for talking to the best man. He never said anything that I heard, but he took off after the dinner and no one could find him until 4am when they found him passed out in his truck. Just all things she tells me about him make me never want to be around him. I’m kind of hoping he doesn’t come and she just comes with her parents.

Post # 8
Member
3265 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Oh yeah. My MOH’s terrible on-again, off-again boyfriend. Ugh. He’s such an ass.

Post # 10
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Yup. And I only had ~27 people at my wedding. It seems like you cant avoid it.

Post # 11
Member
2865 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Oh god yes.  Where do I start?

My racist uncles.  I’m holding my breath when they meet my black friends and my lesbian friends and my FI’s half latino cousins.

My other uncle that can turn any conversation to Glen Beck.

And of course, the friend who can’t control herself.  I had a tight-knit group of girls in HS, so they are all invited.  One of them REALLY changed after high school, and has caused a sceen at EVERY wedding she has been to out of the group.  I’m just waiting to find her and one of the ushers in the bathroom with her panties around her ankles.  I like the usher well enough, but as he has a problem with being atracted to/attracting crazy. 

On the same lines, does your FI get why you have to invite the nutters from your past?  My FI doesn’t get why I don’t just cut her, to which I reply “It’s a stupid girl rule.”

Post # 12
Member
2264 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@lovelyinside:  Conversations with your FI are not about winning or losing. They’re about negotiating and compromising and learning how to articulate what is important to you. When you think about what really matters in the long run, the smaller things are not the things to get hung up about.

Also, I think it is relatively  normal to invite people to your wedding that you aren’t all that crazy about. 

Post # 14
Member
260 posts
Helper bee

Honestly, yes.  Two girls who are in my circle of friends who I didn’t want to attend.  Our wedding is an intimate destination wedding in Mexico.  One is a flailer who will get drunk and corner my family and tell them her life story, and cry and be dramatic every time there’s alchohol involved.  The other is doesn’t drink whatsoever, and is very judgemental.  Also, she has made it abundantly clear she doesn’t like my fiance.  

The good news is, neither paid their deposit and the deadline has passed.  Hopefully rates will be too expensive for them to consider coming now.

Post # 15
Member
1882 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@lovelyinside:  a couple in my fiance’s large friend group that I don’t get along with are invited to our wedding. They just aren’t nice to me… they got this preconceived notion about who I was when they first met me (based on the way I look), and they treat me accordingly. It’s pretty awful and I hate being around them because they intentionally try to make me feel like sh*t.

My fiance’s friends are a very tight knit group and only see each other at big events now (due to living far away from one another). Due to this, I am willing to put my own feelings of very intense dislike aside in order to not come between them. And anyway, I’m sure I will be too busy on my wedding day to pay attention to 2 people out of 90-100.  

Post # 16
Member
2865 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@lovelyinside:  I’m not sure if I’m brave for inviting them, or it would be braver to put my foot down and endure the family drama for not inviting them.  My parents are quite convinced they can control themselves.  After the comments one of them made in a mall in ear shot of a group of young men of a different race, I don’t trust that for one second. 

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