Post # 1
I am wondering how many people did not live together until after they were married?
My fiance and I are HS sweet hearts, been together more than a decade, almost a couple yrs past that! And we don’t live together yet… we wanted to wait until we could afford a house, but who knows what we’ll get. But I think it’s weird only because I feel like we -should- live together already, seems like everyone else does before they’re married… curious if anyone is in the same boat at all?
Another thing too I also find there’s a lot of things that will be different about our relationship by living together, isn’t that right? Because right now we only see eachother on weekends… I am trying to paint a picture in my head of what it will be like, I am wondering if it will be a positive change considering living together brings you very close… I sort of feel like even though we’ve been together for so long our relationship is not at a certain level it could be or maybe should be at this point in time, I’m really curious of what’s to come.
Post # 3
My fiance and I have been together for six years almost and we won’t be living together till we get home from the honeymoon in July. 🙂
Post # 4
I was in the same boat. I saw so many friends live with their boyfriends and then have no place to go during the breakup so I decided that I never wanted to live with a guy before we were engaged. My thought was that if we could afford to live together he could afford a ring and I never wanted someone to try me out. Once we got engaged we realized we wanted to buy a house so we just ended up staying put to save and then bought a house a couple months before our wedding. I have nothing against people who do live together, but for me I am happy with the decision I made.
I don’t think we learned anything new about each other it has just been learning to deal with all of the quirks that we already knew each other had. I found it to be a very positive experience for us and we have really come together to be a team.
Post # 5
We’ve been together three years and won’t be living together until maybe another three years after we get married. It’s because I am still in grad school and he lives where he works, almost two hours away from me. We are totally fine with this arrangement and give people the crazy look when they suggest we get a place halfway and commute to our destinations. No thank you!
We see each other on the weekends too, and I feel we already know each other pretty well. I know how messy he can be, he knows how I can just give him that look and he’ll pick up his clothes, and we’ve already established our roles as a team in the kitchen. We know each other’s habits.
@yassim: Have you discussed your concerns with your FI?
Post # 6
It’s a personal decision whether or not to live with someone before marriage. I would not marry someone without living with them first. It’s so cliche, but really there are things that you don’t learn about your partner until you live with them. You can’t really know their habits, how they’ll react to certain situations, etc. until you move in with them. If you’re willing to go into marriage realizing that you don’t know these things, go for it, just don’t fool yourself into thinking you know everything about your partner either way. 🙂
Post # 7
I’m not going to live with my FI until we get back from our honeymoon either! We’ve been together for just over 3.5 years but I think that there will be a lot of adjusting, but it will be so exciting!
Post # 8
I didn’t live with my husband until we got back from our honeymoon either! We firmly believe that if we are the right people for each other, there is nothing we could learn about each other by living together that would be a deal breaker. The whole live together before you are married trend is relatively new, and there were plenty of successful marriages before people lived together to test it out first. We have been married four weeks, and it is exciting to get used to each other in a whole new way!
Post # 9
We did not live together before we got married and we were in our mid-thirties. It was an adjustment getting used to living with someone after having lived alone for so many years.
Post # 10
We didn’t live together before getting married.. Infact we didn’t even get the keys to our apt till 2 days before the wedding. My mom gifted us with getting a “crew” of friends together and moving us while we were on our honeymoon. =)
Post # 11
We were together for more than six years before we got married and we did not live together until the night of the wedding. I have to say that we are both extremely happy that we made that decision. We actually feel like a family that we are. The adjustment for us has been very smooth. We knew each other so well that moving in together was very natural. I love that I come home to my husband, not a boyfriend or fiance. To those who say that you don’t know the person well enough until you get married – I think that’s absolutely untrue. How well you know them will depend on what your relationship is like before marriage and it doesn’t have anything to do with living together. I have been married for over a month now and haven’t yet found out anything new about my husband’s habits or reactions to things. He says the same about me. I knew about all those little things as well as the big differences between us before we moved in together and I made every effort to make sure that I can deal with them before I we even started talking about marriage. I know that everyone’s situation is different, but in our case it worked out perfectly. It was well worth the wait.
Post # 12
We don’t live together, I just moved into the renal house we will be sharing after the wedidng. Glad that it isnt just us! He does have copies of my keys though, since I tend to lose things….
Post # 13
I moved in with my DH a month before the wedding bc I didn’t want to have to deal with moving after the wedding. 🙂 It was perfect for us.
Post # 14
What is special abaout marriage if you do everything that married people do BEFORE you get married? So FI and I have opted not to live together till we’re married to leave SOMETHING undone until marriage…to us it will make us feel more married if we do not live together before.
Post # 15
FH and I are long distance and have been our entire relationship. I will be moving into our apartment about 3 weeks before the wedding so we technically will be living together then. We however will be in separate bedrooms because we are also waiting until we get married to do the dirty. (I know it’s not actually dirty, I’m just a dork and like calling it that) I’m all for waiting until marriage before living together however I think that that is an individual decision. What works for one couple doesn’t necessarily work for every couple. I am excited for when we actually get to see each other on a daily basis and learn about each other as husband and wife.
Post # 16
we didnt live together until we married, i went from my parents house to my husbands, neither of us wanted to live together until we were married