Post # 1
Ok it’s been a while since i went looking at rings with my SO. I thought what i was feeling would pass but it still bugs me a little. My SO sugguested we go ring shopping during a lunch date and the following week we took time off to do just that. I didn’t tell anybody because i was sure that even though this is a step in the right direction my SO like to do things WAAAAAAAAAAY in advice. Anyway we meet up and explore the jewlery stored in our downtown area (only place to really buy jewlery over here). I made I comment years ago that my fave metal is rose gold and since then my SO has been hell bent in my e ring to be said metal even tho he wasn’t sure what rose gold was or my ring size lol.
Anyway we go to the first store they measure for my ring size and looked at the only 2 rose gold rings they had. I liked one but wasn’t fully loving it. But felt hopeful that we atleast saw something and move on the the next store. 4 stores later nothing not a single rose gold. i started to get discouraged and my SO went to the last store in that area. They didn’t have any at that location so carried us to their next location. However there wasn’t any RG e rings but wedding bands. ready to give up but my SO told me that it never hurts to just look.
As I’m trying on a beautiful whit gold ring it just din’t feel like my ring. And then I hear my SO calling out “Mom”. She asked why we were there it was very close to where she works and honestly I froze. I wasn’t sure if we were letting ppl know yet and when she found out she was so excited and even hanged around a bit. So we went to other booths in that area and they had amazing accented w/RG rings but none felt right. The sales lady found a few rings that i would wear as a RHR but I didn’t think it was my ring. As I’m shaking my head the SL makes what I know was a joke saying ” Knew the rock would be to small for you” when I look up my SO mom is right over she shoulder. I felt like such a brat.
My SO mom and I are finally at a place where we see each other as family and I don’t feel judged. It took her a very long time to accept our relationship & I honestly never blamed her to how she felt (Image your 19 year old son gettign involved with a 16 year old girl who honeslty looked about 14 in the face and 12 in height). With our history I didn’t want to seem difficult and bratty, and after turning down all those rings that honestly where beautiful that’s exactly how I felt.
We checked maybe 6-8 different stores after that and thought we found the ring. My SO was so excited and wanted to make a payment the following Monday. He never got a chance because that money was needed for something else that was very important and I told him that I was fine about it (which I honestly am). I have told him how I feel and he thinks that I’m adorable but totally ridiculous because thought thought never cross his or his mother’s mind.
Really need to learn how to cut these things shorter but did anyone else have a akward or uncomfortabel situation when/if you and your SO went ring shopping?
Post # 3
A good friend of mine said that her ring shopping experience really wasn’t fun…but I honestly think it was her fault. She’s a spender and wasn’t happy with the choices that her SO’s budget allowed – which was $7,000 and plenty for a nice ring, I think. :/
Post # 4
I didn’t like the way we were treated by a lot of sales people, almost as if we were just there to waste their time. That was a bit disheartening, but I did learn a lot from the few who really took the time to help us. All in all, it was fun but shocking to see how little you can get for the money.
Post # 5
I don’t have, by choice, an engagement ring but I do remember getting trapped into a jewellery store being shown a whole range of wedding bands that were astronomically expensive and not what I wanted at all! DH and I are pretty savvy about shopping and avoiding pressure sales but for all that, we found ourselves coming up with an excuse and doing a runner! Not what we’d hoped for when ring shopping!
We did find my perfect ring just around the corner as it happens in an antique jewellery shop where they were delightful and absolutely not pushy. But the awful thought that we’d never get out of the first shop without spending around $10,000 on something I didn’t want was not a happy one!
Post # 6
@242beauty: I felt a lot of guilt because I knew about what he wanted to spend but everything I fell in love with was over that budget. I told him I would love anything he picked, that I’m sure there’s something in every price range I would like, but that if I am looking to fall in love my taste ranges a little above what he wanted to spend. I also didn’t like how pushy some of the sales people were. One wanted to run SO’s credit before showing us anything so he would know what SO was qualified for (ie, only show us the most expensive in the range) He backed off and eventually passed us off to someone else when I spoke up and said we weren’t buying today we were just looking. I would love to go again, though. I feel like we fit too many stores in one day and SO sort of “checked out” of the whole thing towards the end. Oh well! He got business cards and knows some of the things I like in a ring.
Post # 7
I loved it. We had a great salesman we worked with who we’ve since become friends with. I think the salesperson you work with can make or break the experience. It’s definitely a frustrating process at times, but don’t settle, take your time. Many stores don’t have rosegold, but it doesn’t hurt to inquire about if certain rings can be made in rose gold or what it would cost to go the custom route.
Also, don’t overthink the thing with his mom – I’m sure that’s not what she was thinking at all!
Post # 8
@242beauty: I wasn’t, it wasn’t because I didn’t have the budget to get what I wanted it was just that I could FIND what I wanted.
We went to countless stores and nothing. I tried on so many diamonds/sapphires and nothings was “me” and my FI was stuck on getting me a round diamond which made it harder because I didn’t really WANT a diamond…it was all stressful but I eventually found what I wanted and I love it
Post # 9
@242beauty: I didn’t shop with FI for a few reasons (mostly because he forbid it ha) but honestly, I’m glad I didnt. The ONE time we went into a store before he proposed (turns out the ring was already being made there, actually) I literally almost had a panic attack. Something about talking to him about such an important and expensive purchase totally freaked me out. I’m glad we didn’t do it together!
I also did my “prelim” shopping alone and then only with a few close female friends who knew our rough budget and have a similar financial situation- I would never have shopped with my mom or sister because I don’t think it would have been fun shopping for something of that cost with people who “disapprove.”
My advice moving forward would be to go it alone or tell FI you dont want to be involved!
Post # 10
I got annoyed by it. My DH was much more picky than I was and it took sooo long for the two of us to find something we both loved.
Post # 11
I would have preferred to shop around but my bf found a local jeweler that he liked the sound of on Google reviews (!) and we rode with them the whole way. Small nondescript store downtown, upon arrival they were snobby and not terribly helpful until they gleaned that he’s rich and hadn’t give me a concrete budget. After that they kinda pulled out “the stops” which consisted of getting me a plastic cup of water cooler h2O-there was only so much they could do because it isn’t a glamorous store at all, just a little family shop with nice pieces if you care to look closely enough.
It was kind of a pain in the ass for me, multiple multiple visits while they called in favors from their vendors to get me a sizeable, ethically sourced, excellent quality stone-something I’m not sure they were used to at all. He’d ship in 2 or 3 at a time and I rejected the first 8. Also, I wear a size 8, so I could never try anything on, as every sample was a size 6 or below (wtf-do we need plus sized jewelers too? just have a variety geesh!)
When I imagined ring shopping in the past, it was always at Cartier or Tiffany and there was definitely Dom and some scones somewhere in the scene. Alas-I’m not a Kardashian so my ring experience was very real world. I’m pretty sure we could have gotten a better deal but overall it was important for him to support a local business and we’re pleased with the ring.
Post # 12
- Wedding: October 2014 - Restaurant
I didn’t enjoy the ring shopping experience as much as I thought I would. I like rose gold too! And vintage style that is not really popular right now in the big jewelry stores. We went to store after store and I didn’t really see much that I liked. Then we would go to vintage jewelry shops and I loved everything, but my BF didn’t! He wanted a new ring with the style I liked. I get frustrated easily with shopping and this was no exception.
The most fun was creating a secert pinterest board with my BF where we pinned rings we liked from the web (to get a sense of what we both envisioned). By the end I had no doubts he knew exactly what I wanted, although I’m still waiting so we’ll see!
Post # 13
@242beauty: I feel like the idea of ring shopping is almost as romanticized as the idea of dress shopping: real life, for a lot of gals, just doesnt measure up to the made-for-tv-movie they had it played up to be in their heads. So I think that is perfectly normal.
We had looked casually in a variety of stores before I actually tried anything on. We were super independent and were either trying not to pester the sales folk, or actively trying to get away from the sales folk pestering *us*.
I only actually tried on rings in one store, and it was a pleasent experience. The salespeople were very sweet and understood we werent ready to buy, but still were enthusiastic. I found a ring I like a lot and I was sure we’d buy it there. That was in December. I enjoyed it the visit, but it wasnt blowing my mind and making me see stars or anything. It was just a fun errand.
Fast forward to April and we found a ring online we loved WAY more, and it’s the one FI purchased for me.
I think that, at the end of the day, the brides perception of these events has a lot to do with a) how high her expectations were of a magical experience and b) how emotional/sentimental she is.
Post # 14
@MissRuthie: My taste is normally very beyond our ability. However he set the budget and it was higher then I was thinking (still not a huge budget tho). We stayed within budget or very close the very few that were above that price. He enjoyed himself honestly he said he learned alot about my taste, and since he knew nothing about styles and stuff he wanted me to be there to get a feel of what I truly liked. I told him that whatever ring shopping he does is on his own from now on because as much as I love “shiny stuff” it stressed me out a bit. Plus if he honestly loved it and thougth”that my girls ring right there” I would never want anything else. His fear is me hating it and wanting to replace it if only he would accept I would love it because he gave it to me.
@ChicFoodist: I totally understand that happening, but honestly rings I was looking at online weren’t even 1/4 of the price he set. I felt like i was making things difficult when it should be simple pick a ring, try it on, fall in love with it and start payment lol. I wasn’t trying to be difficult and honestly all the sales ladies were so sweet. The comment the sale lady made I would have laughed it off and not take it seriously if SO mom wasn’t right there.
Post # 15
@242beauty: I did. I was realistic and didn’t get suckered in to the high priced rings we couldn’t afford. What we picked out is the most beautiful ring and I love it. I had a hard time keeping my excitment composed. LOL.
Post # 16
@badabing88: Lol yea I know that happens when dress shopping…which is why whenver it is time my dress will be custom mde by either my aunt or I lol. I love jewlery or as i say to my SO “shiny stuff” and walked in very open minded or so I thought lol because even though i liked every ring i tried on it wasn’t right some how. Thankfully my SO said he knows what to look for now, that it will be RG with a halo (he really want to get my a pink stone since it’s my fave color), so no more ring shopping for me . He said he wants the ring to scream me.