Post # 1
Being in my 30’s I felt like having a shower and bachelorette weekend would be redundant. I wasn’t someone that dated a million guys. And having been living on my own for many years, I already had all the necessary housewares. I feel like it was expect of me to have these parties, but I have said no to having them mainly because I feel bad for putting people out, asking them to spend money, and my closest friends live nowhere near me etc. Am I a bad bride? Did anyone else skip all the engagement hoopla?
Post # 2
I skipped them both. I am in my mid thirties and DH and I lived together and had everything we needed. And I hate being the center of attention—it’s just awkward. I did go out for dinner with a couple girlfriends but I wouldn’t say it was a bachelorette party in the normal sense. No feather boas, no penis games, no getting completely ridiculous drunk. Just a fun evening. It’s your choice! Nothing wrong with skipping it and the gravy boat.
Post # 3
kygirl242 : I skipped them both as well. For us it was more logistical, wedding was in one province, pretty much all our guests were elsewhere. It wouldn’t really have been possible. Sometimes I wish I’d figured out a way to have them, I’m sad I missed out on some fun with my BMs and close friends, but all the same we had an amazing wedding and I didn’t really need to prance around the city with like up penises on my head
Post # 4
- Wedding: Disneyland - January 2016
Why would that make you a bad bride? My cousin did throw me a bridal shower which was nice, though I didn’t have a traditional bachelorette party. Two of my four bridesmaids (the two who didn’t attend were my sisters) took me to get a massage/facial the night before my wedding, and that was my bachelorette. I’ve never been to a professional spa before, and I was SO relaxed and had such an amazing time. I would never have traded it for an actual party!
Post # 5
I skipped both as well. We are in our 30s and have kids so we have everything and we don’t party anymore. Also, most of my friends/family had to travel here for the wedding so we didn’t ask them to do anything extra.
Post # 6
I skipped all the pre-wedding parties. My friends and family, live all over the country and it really didn’t seem worth the hassle to try to get a date and location people could agree to.
Post # 7
I am not having either. I don’t like being the centre of attention, not into parties, not into girly get togethers and i just don’t see the point.
Post # 8
- Wedding: August 2016 - The Venetian
I didn’t have a shower and didn’t want a bachelorette either.
But my girls convinced me to do a spa day/dinner a few weeks before the wedding. It was nice to just relax and not have to think about anything wedding related for the day.
Post # 9
I am likely skipping them. A shower sounds like an incredible bore, and I don’t have enough in-town people to make a bachelorette party.
Post # 10
I feel I’m way too old for a shower. As for a bachelorette, I plan on treating a few girlfriends to a spa day and dinner out. Neither of these parties are required, of course. Do you have people pressuring you into them?
Post # 11
Didn’t have an engagement party, didn’t have a bridal shower. Didn’t miss either.
However I did have a hen party, everyone travelled and we had a weekend away in a rented house. Lots of fun and as everyone travelled to it, people shared lifts where they could and we all chipped in to cover the cost.
Post # 12
I didn’t have a shower – my DH and I had been living together for a few years so it just felt redundant when we have everything we could possibly need. I did have a bachelorette party, but more so because my bridesmaids wanted to throw me one. I felt it was fairly low key – there weren’t any sashes or veils or penis straws or any of that stuff lol. We did a cocktail making class and then went out for dinner. I had some family and friends in attendance – it was just a nice girls night.
Post # 13
kygirl242 : I didn’t have either one. I hate the concept of bachelorette parties, which seem to be spinning out of control over the years. And I live much too far from all of my friends/family for a bridal shower either. I kind of missed that one – I’ll freely admit I love getting presents and I enjoy showers, so I wish I’d gotten my own. But I’ll live and didn’t need much either. Now I’m expecting (fingers crossed for confirmation at the Dr. this week) and know a baby shower isn’t likely to happen either, which is disappointing.
Either way, no one considered me a bad bride for it. Your friends will live if that’s something you don’t want.
Post # 14
- Wedding: June 2017 - Cottage in Bobcaygeon
kygirl242 : I think ALL brides deserve a shower no matter how old or how many times you have been married. Bachelorette? meh Im not a big party girl and I know we are all broke so we are keping really low key as in it will not be a destination or a weekend long thing. The shower will be at my FMILs hosted/organized by FMIL, FSIL (BM) and my (i think) mom and sis(moh) it will be near Montreal where at least 3/4 of invitees live and my FMIL and FSIL too, the rest are near Toronto including me, mom, sis (moh) and another friend (bm) and a couple guests… we’ll be driving on a friday, help set up, then on saturday it’s the shower, just a casual brunch for all the ladies, most of them are FIs family and the “bachelorette” will be dinner and drinks just me and by bms and maybe a couple other girls on sat night. Sunday will be spent recovering, and driving back to Toronto. 2 in 1 both shower and bachelorette in one weekend. Short and sweet cause I didnt want either to be any big lavish deal. So if you feel silly having a shower and bachelorette maybe do that. Shower brunch, then bachelorette dinner/drinks. Ill be 2 weeks away from 32y.o. If that helps.
Post # 15
I didn’t have either. We already had enough stuff for our household, and I don’t really have a lot of close friends to make a bachelorette party worthwhile. Everything turned out fine.