Post # 1
The title says it all! I have recently become really interested in eloping – basically turning our wedding into a private, intimate moment between FI and myself in a spectacular location. The only problem is that FI isn’t really on board with the idea. He thinks we will regret not having a “real” wedding and not having our family and friends with us. I have never heard of ANYONE regretting eloping (only the other way around), but I’m wondering if any Bees who eloped (or had a teeny, tiny wedding) ended up regretting it.
Post # 3
Nope, it was perfect! I’ve done it both ways (traditional wedding, albeit small, the first marriage, eloping this time), and I can say, without a single doubt, eloping was the best!
Is your guy on board because he thinks YOU will regret it, or because HE doesn’t want to elope?
Post # 4
I’m excited to hear replies on this thread. I’m considering elopement, but not in the real meaning of the word (I’d include my parents and best friend). However, the only thing really holding me back, just like the OP said, is I worry a tiny bit about regretting it.
Post # 5
Non, je ne regrette rien!
I don’t regret one single thing about eloping! Not the decision to get married, not the mad dash to the Caribbean, not keeping it to ourselves until it organically came up (meaning some people still don’t know and his parents learned 18 months after the fact).
For me it was nothing but win-win-win-win. Intimate, adventurous, clandestine, informal. Swimming in the warm ocean in your short, hot-pink cotton wedding dress just after the ceremony? Yes, please! No stress, no hassle, no compromise. We did it on no one’s terms but our own.
@GFerg: asks an important question, “Is your guy on board because he thinks YOU will regret it, or because HE doesn’t want to elope?”
Post # 6
@annb9: I’m thinking of eloping too, we’re looking at Mauritius in November and we know a lot of the people and family we would have liked to see us get married may not be able to afford to come, however this is our day, our decision, therefore I don’t think we’ll have any regrets. We are planning a big party when we get back with all of our family and friends to celebrate, other than the actual ceremony the reception is the main part too!
The main reason we are eloping aside from the act my fiance had always liked the idea and I’m not too precious about a ‘traditional’ wedding was money, me and my FI have been to two weddings in 2013, one was £30k and the other £24k, they woke up the next day and although it was amazing, their reception was what they remembered the most, and they now have to start saving AGAIN for a mortgage.
For us we’ll have a fabulous holiday, wedding on the beach and honeymoon then come back and party with all of our loved ones and will have only spen £4,500! Then early 2015 we should have enough for a mortgage 🙂
Post # 7
Here is a small recap of my beach elopement!
I am so glad that we didn’t go into debt over a wedding, or stressed out about making everyone else happy. Our day was fantastic! We married at the ocean in the early AM. Had our friend officiate. Another friend who is a photographer took our photos (we paid him a small stipend). I still got to have a dress, a bouquet, a bouquet toss, photos, a cake, a cake topper, and a mini-moon. We went and played on the boardwalk rides after and had a blast, went out to brunch, stayed overnight along the ocean, had dinner, champagne. It was nice! We sent out wedding announcements to all our nearest and dearest (about 50 or so). Many people were generous and sent us cards (with cash), which we weren’t at all expecting. It was so kind of them. Our friends were all happy for us.
You can always get local/close family together for a meal at some point to celebrate later.
Do what makes the most sense for you, and makes you the most happy. My husband was a little worried about eloping as well (hell, even I was). But I know it was the best thing for us.
Post # 8
@iloverocks: Thanks!! Your plan sounds AMAZING. I think I’m starting to get FI on board with the whole idea, too, so we’ll see.
@FutureMrsMarlow: Ah your wedding was beautiful! Exactly the kind of thing I have in mind for an elopment if we decide to go down that route.
Post # 9
@GFerg: I think it’s kind of a combination of both. Although we talked about it the other day and he seems more on board. I think he’s mostly worried about disappointing his parents and grandparents, but the idea seems to be growing on him!
Post # 10
We “eloped” (Our parents were present but it was very intimate and just us.) and we had a wedding later… I preferred our justice of the peace marriage. It was much more low key and “us”, the wedding was a hassle. I’d never do it again.
Post # 11
@annb9: I think the main issue here is your fiance’s opinion. You might regret it if your fiance is not 100% onboard.
Post # 12
@annb9: So maybe a happy medium – have a small, intimate wedding with just immediate family members. That way, you aren’t eloping (just the two of you) but you aren’t having a huge ordeal (hundreds of people and lots of debt). 🙂 Maybe that’s a good compromise?
Post # 13
We are really happy that we went with our intimate wedding. We did have our best man, MOH and their significant others present as our witnesses. It was still very romantic and we were able to spend the evening being able to talk to each other and enjoy our special day. Our families knew we were getting married this way and they were all on board with it!! We did get the ceremony videotaped so that our family and friends are able to watch the service. Overall it was romantic and was very affordable.
Post # 14
Just reading this makes me jealous. My fiance wanted a wedding and part of me questioned if I’d regret eloping. I don’t think that I would have but honestly your FI’s opinion is important.
Post # 15
I’m not sure if I’m even qualified to answer on this thread but here goes.
We were both up for eloping…kind of….for me it was really important that my mom was present and he also was concerned he would regret not having his brother, sister and parents there. After we said “ok, a super small wedding” we started looking at small venues and we realized we want grandparents and aunts and uncles and even a few (literally, a few) close friends. We’re having a 55 person wedding next month that consists of 6 friends and the rest are family. We are SO happy we decided to do this.
So while I’m sure eloping would have been fun for us – seeing that planning a small wedding hasn’t been so bad – I’m sure we would not have realized how much we would enjoy having our nearest and dearest with us.
Post # 16
We haven’t eloped yet, but we’ve already booked where we are staying as well as photographer. We’re both on board with eloping, which is the most important thing, in my opinion.