Did everyone have an "opinion" about the length of your engagement?

posted 3 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

HA i know just what you mean!!  Mine was 7 months and I got a lot of comments about maybe I was pregnant. RUDE

Post # 4
875 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

yeah i know exactly what you mean! I’m right at the end of our 8 month engagement. Everyone had something to say!! But mostly I agreed with them bc it has been hell to plan a wedding this fast! 

Post # 5
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@Dayna_RA:  You can’t please everyone, and everyone will always have an opinion. Don’t you love unsolicited advice? I got engaged after 3 months and everyone I know had something to say about it (to which I told them where to go). We got legally married very soon after that, but we still haven’t had an “official” ceremony. I am constantly asked when that will FINALLY happen, to which I say, when we feel like it.

I just don’t cater to folks who want to judge me. Only I know what’s best for my life.

Post # 6
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Dayna_RA:  Kind of.  We got engaged right after college, and everyone thought that our 23-month long engagement was such a great idea.  I think they would have had more contrary opinions if we had announced that we were getting married sooner.

Post # 7
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

No one has really said anything to me, but I also don’t really talk about the wedding very much unless directly asked.  Some people have asked the date, but there’s no comment on it just “I’ll mark it down” type responses.  Don’t let it get to you.  You know what’s right for your plans 🙂

Post # 8
6052 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

Yep. Ours was 20 months – dh was also gone for 12 of those months. We got a lot of comments about how long it was. A lot of vendors didn’t really take us seriously at first because it was such a long engagement. 

Post # 9
3806 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Dayna_RA:  The length of our engagement is 9 months but I’ve received nothing but positive comments and compliments for pulling off the planning in such an efficient amount of time. I’m in my 30s so perhaps the demographic is different. Most of the people I speak to are 35 and older so perhaps they are of the mind of “why wait?!” Do you think they are saying that because of your age? 

My thing is, if you want to get married, you want to get married. It shouldn’t matter if it’s 18 hours after the proposal, 18 days or 18 months. So really, outside of dealing with logistics and finances, what’s the point of waiting?

Post # 11
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

We are getting married a year after the proposal..I mostly had people ask why I was waiting so long! You cannot win! Someone will always have an opinion on it. I just told everyone I wanted time to plan..conversely to OP I didn’t want a wedding in the middle of a Wisconsin winter. Too cold and unpredictable.

Post # 12
5087 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

Yep it usually goes…”oh congratulations! When’s the wedding? Me: April…2015. 

“Oh dear, why soooo long? Everyone has long engagements these days.” “I don’t think long engagements are are a good idea!” 

We have to save for the wedding ourselves. I also don’t want people to judge us because I’ve been married before and my last wedding was quick and rushed. This engagement will be long and our marriage will be long too. This one is for life.  

Post # 14
3806 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Dayna_RA:  Same boat, friend. I’m 31 and he’s 33 and we DO want to start a family as soon as possible. Yeah, some people must carry around a secret handbook with rules of how long we ALL must do something in order for it to be socially acceptable. FI and I were together for 6 months before getting engaged so I feel your pain with the comments. We definitely received a few.

Post # 15
19 posts
  • Wedding: September 2014

FI proposed Christmas Eve 2012 and we are getting married September 2014. I consider it a VERY long engagement. Alot longer than I had planned, but he’s in the process of a second location for his business and we also live in Kentucky and our wedding is in Michigan. Giving myself enough time was a good idea. If your engagement is 9 months, who cares?! In the end, you get to marry your best friend that much sooner! 🙂

Post # 16
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

@Dayna_RA:  when we told his mom we were thinking of setting an early 2015 date, she said, “Why are you going to wait so long??” You can’t win 🙂

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