(Closed) Did I do something bad…

posted 7 years ago in Interfaith
  • poll: Was this rude on my part
    Good : (12 votes)
    14 %
    Bad : (68 votes)
    79 %
    Other posted below : (6 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 4
    Member
    103 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Eh… I think it’s passive-aggressive to use a Facebook post to hope that someone/some people recognize that the message is aimed at them.  Take that post and say it or e-mail it directly to them.  It expresses your beliefs very well, and I think the FILs would respond to it much better coming from you and your FH than to see it on FB.  Hopefully they would understand your wishes and be willing to show that gesture of respect.  If not, you’d have to decide if it’s worth creating drama over.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2116 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I agree that its pretty rude to post that on Facebook, rather than to say it directly to them. I’d take that post down if I were you and talk to the in-laws directly

    Post # 7
    Member
    4336 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Next time they ask you if they “have to” wear it, then ask if you “have to” genuflect when you come into a Catholic church.

    (but, I suppose, unfortunately if they are not very practicing or devout Catholics themselves, then they might not quite get the analogy…)

    but…definitely, don’t be “passive aggressive” by putting something on facebook. It’s not bad, it’s just…immature. Just have a heart to heart conversation with them.

    Post # 10
    Member
    283 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I understand that you want your FILs to show basic respect to your religion and that is completely acceptable.

    However, it is not acceptable to be passive aggressive to your future family over Facebook. It’s actually pretty childish, and I can promise you this: nothing good will come out of it. You can defend it however you want, but you asked if it was “bad”, and the answers you are getting are that yes, it is. Being passive aggressive isn’t a good way to express your faith to others, it’s a pretty bold contradiction actually.

    I think it would be better received if you spoke of sent the passage to them personally with a note of your own attached. “I’m not the best at descriptions, but I found this regarding kippahs and thought it might help you understand why” blah blah blah. If that doesn’t work, you will just have to learn to let it go.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1003 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Or maybe they are trying to be respectful because they aren’t Jewish and don’t really understand what the Kippah means to your religion and you. As another poster suggested you should take that little clip that you posted on facebook and just send it right to them explaining first what it means in the context of Judaism and then what it means to you/your family.

    And while wearing a Kippah is a sign of respect to God in Judaism, devot Catholics have different ways of showing their respect towards God. And you need to respect that as well. If they don’t want to wear it maybe you can meet halfway on something, or just at least be blessed that they do in fact recognize God in their lives.

    P.s I don’t think you did something bad persay. I just think you are going about it the wrong way. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    18 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I agree that it was passive aggressive…much better to speak to them directly about how they’ve hurt your feelings.  However, I can relate because it’s an issue I’m sure will come up in my own wedding.  It is disrespectful for them to say things like that so I can see why you’d be angry.  

    On a side note, I’ve never heard that it’s against Judaism to go into a church??

    Post # 16
    Member
    4336 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @FutureMrsChaney:wow, I am so sorry to hear that! That is so obnoxious! I hope you don’t let that dampen your opinion of all Catholics… :-/

    The topic ‘Did I do something bad…’ is closed to new replies.

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