Post # 1
All my bridesmaids are very opinionated in what kind of dress they get and no one can pick anything out. I’ve never had a say in any of the bridesmaid dresses that i’ve worn before. i was always told what i was going to wear and i just went with that. I’m wondering if they are taking advantage of the fact that i care what they think about the dresses. is there something that i’m missing. Do bridesmaids really get this much say in their dresses? i want their opinion but i’m starting to feeling like no one cares about what i think they should wear so it matches everything else at the wedding.
Post # 3
Why don’t you just pick for them and let that be the end of it? If they can handle choosing their own, as you’ve given them fair opportunity to do, do it for them.
Post # 4
I gave my girls a color, fabric, and designer and said pick one. I did end up changing the color because one of them couldn’t find a dress she liked in the color I originally wanted, but oh well. I think that you should be able to set parameters (length, color, fabric) and then have them choose within that. As long as the dress isn’t too expensive (which is something you would have to figure out with your girls), then they should really be able to stick to your guidelines and wear something that you like. It’s part of being a bridesmaid, IMO.
Post # 5
In every wedding where I was a bridesmaid, the bride picked out the dresses and told us what to order.
Post # 6
I was MOH in my best friends wedding 2 years ago and she asked that it be floor length and any light to medium purple color.
Post # 7
I’ve always gotten to go and try dresses on but ultimately the bride picked what she liked and I was fine with it. I just think it’s her pictures, her wedding, her day, etc and she should be happy with how everything looks (yes I am calling myself a thing).
Post # 8
I asked for opinions but ultimately made the decision.
Post # 9
I think that giving choices to bridesmaids is really considerate, but my bridesmaids actually wanted me to choose a dress so they didn’t have to stress over which one to choose. I think it’s different with every group of bridesmaids, so ask your girls what they would prefer: Should you choose the dress, or would they like you to select a color and/or designer they have to go with?
Post # 10
I have been in two weddings and had my own. In the first one, the bride told us she didn’t care, just that she wanted it to be long, that they could even be different styles as long as they were the same colour. All of us went shopping with the bride and ended up picking the same dress, but two of us were very easy-going. The second was my sister’s wedding, I spent hours going to different stores and trying on dresses and sending them to my sister & the other attendants. From the pictures we all agreed on one dress my sister liked. For my own wedding, I told my sisters it had to be green and short and they could find one they liked. They wore different dresses.
It seems as though you want to be accommodating to your friends, but it can be difficult if they are argumentative or picky. If you want them to all wear the same style and colour of dress, you will likely have a hard time (the first time I was a bridesmaid two of the girls were very picky and if the other two of us had also been picky it would have been impossible). You might just have to pick one out!
Post # 11
2 of my BM went with me and I picked something out I thought would look good on everyone and was economical.
Post # 12
Yeah they’re probably taking advantage. Like hilsy85 I think you need to set some parameters so that it also reminds them it’s your final decision.