Post # 1
I am on the fence about inviting my boss… I work directly with him, and love my job. Here are some points:
- I don’t see myself leaving the company anytime soon (I could see it being a 25 year type thing, there are lots of people here that have worked here 15+ years too).
- We are trying to keep the wedding small, around 65 people.
- He wouldn’t know anyone else there, but is fairly social and his girlfriend is a big sweetheart.
- He is the age of my parents, and his son is a year older than me I work with as well, so I sort of see him as a parent figure less than a friend.
- I have been here for four years, and got engaged last year wile I was working here.
- I am his direct assistant so I do all his design work for him.
- I don’t want to hurt other coworkers feelings, but I feel bad only inviting him and not anyone else- I have a great management team and if budget was no object, would invite them as well.
What did you do, and why? What would you do in my situation? I should also add that he is the owner of the company, so it isn’t like he could quit tomorrow etc.
Post # 2
I did not invite my boss. We do not socialize outside of work so there was no way I was priorizing inviting her over other family and friends. I was inviting those closest to us as a couple, and on that basis alone she did not make the cut.
I will add that I am a firm believer in separating work from personal life.
Post # 3
In this situation, if you do have room to invite him and his gf, I would. I don’t think he would be terribly upset if you didn’t invite him, simply because men tend not to care about these things.
I invited my direct supervisor and then the provincial manager, each with a plus 1. My direct supervisor RSVP’ed yes, but 2 days before told me she couldn’t attend anymore because her husband had ordered meat, and it was ready to be picked up on the day of my wedding. Major eye roll.
Post # 4
MissLibra: I also had a small wedding of less than 60 people. I invited my boss because we have a great working relationship and I genuinely wanted her there and thought she would enjoy being there. And she did. I also invited the three girls I am closest to at my office and their spouses. Everyone came and everyone had a great time. No one else at my office has had the nerve to call me out on not inviting them.
Post # 5
I did invite my boss. I had worked for her for 9 years at that point and she had thrown me a baby shower at work and had always been very kind to me. I was also fond of her husband who is a minister and had baptized my daughter.
Post # 6
I am inviting my boss, but my situation is very different as I have known him for a long, LONG time. Over 20 years! We are inviting my supervisors and any coworkers that I’ve known for a long time as well.
My work place is like one big, dysfunctional family though, so it only seemed right.
SO will be inviting both of his superiors, as well as a few co workers he considers friends.
Post # 7
- Wedding: August 2008 - Toronto, ON
Well we invited 125 people so we had the extra space to invite my boss and his wife and so we did and they were very grateful to accept the invitation. I wasn’t going to invite them at first but I was in the lunch room and my boss’ wife who works in the shipping/receiving department for the company joked and asked where her invite was so I felt kind of obligated to invite them but I am glad I did, I also invited a few close co-workers as well. My boss and his wife gave us a toaster oven and a few other really nice gifts, so I was kind of glad I invited them! LOL It is really up to you and what you feel comfortable doing.
Post # 8
I invited my direct boss, but we are friends. We occasionally hang out outside of work and his wife and I get along great. We also invited two of the owners of the company we work for, but again, we are good friends with them and have hung out with them on many occasions.
Post # 9
MissLibra: I did not invite my boss although I did invite a couple co-workers. One co-worker was someone that I socialized outside of work with, and the other co-worker actually introduced me to DH. I am friendly with my boss, however I know that he has an extremely busy schedule both in the office and outside the office. I felt that I would be imposing a burden upon him by inviting him to my wedding, hence I did not invite him. There were no hard feelings either.
Post # 10
I did not invite my boss. Like it or not, people form an opinion of you even outside of work. For corporate social events, you still have to be mindful of your behavior. I didn’t want that on my mind during the wedding (I’m not planning on getting trashed or anything, but if I’m a little silly, I don’t want my boss seeing it)
Post # 11
We don’t “hang out” so to speak after work, but my office is very lax, we drink wine on Friday afternoons and attend a lot of boozy functions, so I am in no way worried about my boss seeing me or my other guests drink- I have seen him and my coworkers drunk many many times lol. I just feel bad only inviting him, I worry if I do, will others be upset I didn’t invite them?
Post # 12
MissLibra: I am not inviting my boss. I have been at my organization for almost seven years – all of which he has been the president, and we are a small organization – but we are not particularly close. It’s always a tough call, and you never want to offend anyone, but the end of the day you have to do what’s right for you. We are having a decently large wedding (aiming for 180) but we are already over that number of invitees and can’t afford to invite every person both of us work with – so we each inviting a few key people on staff that we are close with (I know that goes against the all or nothing rule – but I am genuinely out of office friends with one person, and the other is my mentor.)
So whatever you end up choosing will be right! (I just wouldn’t broadcast it to the rest of the team if you are only inviting your boss).
Post # 13
I am super friendly with my boss, but she will not getting invited to my wedding. Additionally, I work in a branch of my office with one other girl. We are friendly with one another, but she is not getting invited, either. That being said, I am aiming for a smaller wedding (I would love 75 or under–but will be closer to 100) and they wouldn’t know anyone, so it would be a little awkward.
Post # 14
sounds like it’d work well to invite your boss & his gf, but nobody else from work. your wedding is too small to feel bad about not inviting the others on the management team, so don’t feel bad at all. My boss asked how big my wedding was, I told him 120 ppl max. He said- oh that’s small, so it’s really just friends and family. Then, luckily, a few mos later our rsvps worked out so that I could invite him and a few others I’m closer to at work. He hasn’t said it explicitly, but I think he really likes that I invited him.
Nobody at work was expecting an invite because I had mentioned (whenever asked) how tough it was to even invite all of our relatives. For a max 120 person wedding which we’re paying for on our own, we had at least 80 family members, add bridal party and SOs and you can barely invite your friends. If you keep saying (whenever anybody else brings it up), that it’s so so hard b/c you can only invite 60 ppl, I think they’ll get it.
Post # 15
I’m inviting my current and former bosses because they are beautiful human beings that has been my managesr through some of the hardest points in my life. While I’m not social with my current manager outside of work, I’d like both of them present at this milestone. I truly think the world of them. 🙂