did you let your bridesmaids choose their dresses?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
918 posts
Busy bee

I sent through pictures of a whole lot of different dresses to my bridemaids, and asked them to assign scores to each dress as follows:

1 = I LOVE IT! I would definitely wear that dress again! 😀

2 = I like it. I would probably wear it again.

3 = It’s okay. I’m perfectly happy to wear it for the wedding, and I may wear it again, although I may not.

4 = I don’t like it. I’ll wear it for the wedding, but I won’t wear it again.

5 = I HATE IT! Please don’t make me wear that for the wedding! I don’t want photographic evidence of me in that dress!

As it turns out, the three girls all have quite different tastes, however we did find two dresses for which all three of them had given a score of either a 1 or a 2.  For all of the other dresses, at least one of them had given a 3 (or a 4, and there were even a couple of 5’s).  I made the final decision on which of the two dresses to purchase (I paid for the dresses).

ETA: Oh, so in answer to your question, no, they didn’t choose their own dresses, but they did have significant input into the decision, and everyone was happy with the result.

Post # 4
546 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

They picked the style…I am deciding on the colors now 🙂

Post # 5
1482 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC

I sent a range of dress options and asked them to choose. They wanted me to choose and actually wanted to match. However my MOH did tell me the dress they didnt like

Post # 6
4827 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

I let them pick from 4 and it turned out like this. I was happy!

Post # 7
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I gave them a color (Horizon/Cobalt Blue) and that I wanted long dresses and then set them loose in the store 🙂

The result was that in 45 minutes, they picked out a dress that they all loved and was exactly what I was looking for (i.e. not traditional bridesmaid-y)

Post # 8
1178 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Actually I Chose navy and I let them pick their own style. I don’t have a pic because I’m not married yet but I think it will look great! I told them short dresses and I asked that they try to get the same material.

Post # 9
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I picked the color, the girls picked the style.  My girls have very different body types from each other. I’ve seen them all in the dresses, but not all together, so I guess we’ll see how it turns out on Saturday Smile


Post # 10
4366 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I picked the color, fabric, length and designer (Bari Jay). They had 20 options even with my limitations. 1 chose right away, 1 chose after a couple of months (long engagement), and one told me to pick for her (“they’re all ugly so pick your favorite”). I chose a strapless dress for the last girl because I thought it would be flattering (it is). Everyone except the last girl is happy, but thats just her nature (she’s my sister and doesn’t like not being the center of attention).



Post # 11
3217 posts
Sugar bee

@jlpang:  I  did.  I gave 2 guidelines.  1) dark purple-ish, not lilac or lavendar 2) not too slutty.  That’s it.

Honestly it turned out wonderfully.  They didn’t all match, but they all looked great, and not just like puppets.  They all picked something that was within their budgets, and tastes.  And everyone knew they were in the bridal party.  I let them pick shoes (as a group they picked nude) style didn’t matter to me, and they also didn’t match. They wore their own accessories.

I don’t feel comfortable posting people’s photos on the internet without their permission though, sorry.


Post # 12
8518 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

Nope. But only because I’m paying for the dresses. Plus I know it wouldnt get done till the last minute if I left them in charge.

Post # 13
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@ andielovesj +1

Our wedding is in Nov. I am letting my BMs pick their own dresses within a color/general style parameter. Each of my maids has a very different body type and sense of personal style, and I really wanted them to feel great and have fun in what they were wearing. Too many times I have been stuck paying way too much for a dress that I didn’t even feel particularly good in, and I wanted them to feel confident in beautiful in whatever they choose. I set the color as a dark/true navy, and style as semi dressy– as in no beach style dresses. SO far they have picked lovely dresses, each one that suits the individual well. They are all fantastic dressers day to day, so I am not the least bit worried that one will wear something that I’m like “WTH!”. This has also allowed them to go for off the rack dresses at regular department stores, some with a price tag of like $30, and no alterations! Win!

We are doing nude shoes as well, any nude shoe flats, heels, sandals, as long as its nude.

Havent seen it all together yet, but I am absolutely certain everyone will look great, and I am LOVING that slightly mismatched but together look on bridesmaids!


Post # 14
193 posts
Blushing bee

I let my bridesmaids pick theirs from about 4-5 dresses. They got to decide on length too. I went with Donna Morgan dress in midnight (navy). They all happened to pick the same dress- sweetheart neckline, strapless and short. I was really laid back about their dress/ accessories. 



Post # 15
2051 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I might have let them choose, but I just found a dress in a high street store that I LOVE, and I think that will be the one!


The UK tradition is that the bride pays for the bridesmaid dresses, so I don’t feel at all guilty about choosing the dress for them. FI and I love it, it is just within my budget, it has straps so the girls can wear normal bras and be comfortable, and it is a flattering classic shape. And a weird coincidence (I swear!), all my girls are petite and brunette, so I don’t have to worry about different body types. My MOH tried it on yesterday and it looked wonderful!


Post # 16
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

My bridesmaids are all over the country and have very different styles so I thought I would end up choosing a few dresses that looked similar and letting them all choose their own.  BM from high school came to visit and we tried on BM dresses at David’s (our weddings are 3 months apart and we were in each other’s parties) and she ranked 3 dresses we liked.  When MOH & cousin BM pulled dress on their own at Davids a month later they each chose their favorite which ended up being the same favorite as mine & my high school BM’s!  3/5 blindly agreed?  I called that a win and they all ended up wearing the same dress.

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