Post # 1
I’m wondering if anyone here actually changed their engagement ring setting? Are any engaged bees planning on it? Or, any waiting bees: Would you change it if you didn’t like it?
If you would or did change it, would you involve your FI or DH? Would they be okay with you changing it?
If you wouldn’t, why not? Did you get to pick it out? Or are you just against the whole idea?
Post # 3
The only thing I would potentially change about my setting is adding more diamonds to the band (right now, there are 4 on each side). I would want to either add one or two more to each side, or have them go all the way around. FI and I have talked about it once or twice, he’s very sentimental and doesn’t want to change the ring at all–even though he originally wanted more stones on the band, but for whatever reason, the jeweler didn’t add them. We’ll see–maybe as an anniversary present or something! If we don’t end up changing it though, that’s fine with me too!
Post # 4
My engagement ring is a gift from my fiance–something that he chose all by himself. So why would I ever want to change it?
Post # 5
I picked out my setting. If FH had picked it out it would have been changed, we dont have the same tastes AT ALL!
We were talking about this the other day because one of his friends was going ring shopping with their mom. And i said OH NO! I hope she has shown him pictures! FH said he would have gotten me a solitare (which I guessed!) which is totally not me and totally him.
Post # 6
I picked out my setting, so I would never change it because I love it. If FI picked it out, I highly doubt I would change it (but who knows). He tends to be very sensitive about that sort of thing and I think it would hurt his feelings if he put a lot of effort into choosing something for me and I didn’t like it. He knows my taste and would not pick out something hideous.
Post # 7
My ring is a family ring, my hubby’s great grandma’s. But the setting has been changed since then, my mil changed it into an engagement ring. She told me I could change it if I wanted, but i didn’t want to. First of all, it’s beautiful the way it is, and second of all I want to keep it in the family and have a nice vintage ring.
Post # 8
I wouldn’t change it! But I did in fact choose my own ring!
Post # 9
I just got my ring setting changed. In my initial setting the band went inward as it got to the diamond and I didn’t like the way a wedding band looked with it. I talked to my fiance about it and he was totally okay with it. I think it was a nice compromise between mine and his tastes because he had picked out the stone and the original band by himself, so now there is a bit of both of us in it. He actually loves this setting much more then the original!
Post # 10
I picked out my own setting so NO WAY! I love my current setting.
Post # 11
I wouldn’t change mine for the world. If you’d asked me before I got it, I probably would’ve said I would consider it — but the truth is that now I understand that this ring has so so so much significance. J went through a lot of trouble to pick it out, and I love that about it! Is it the ring I would’ve picked for myself? Nope (hah, I mean, I sent him a link to the one I wanted; his response? Not original enough if I pick it myself!) – but that’s the point!
It’s not a ring I bought myself. It’s a ring he bought for me. That is enough to make me love it for eternity. The fact that he’s got great taste doesn’t hurt either. 🙂
Post # 12
I did change my setting (from classic 6-prong yellow gold solitaire to a rose gold halo setting. FH did not discuss rings with me prior to purchasing the ring, and I never hinted at what I wanted – we never discussed anything. The diamond he picked is lovely – great quality, very sparkly – but honestly, I really didn’t love the setting/width of band/etc. And I had always wanted a rose gold ring. I didn’t want to get a larger stone, just change the metal and the setting.
I don’t wear jewelry – like EVER. This ring, and my wedding band, will be the only item I wear everyday for the rest of my life.
I think it’s sweet to say it should only be the thought that counts, but it’s also jewelry, and jewelry I will look at every day. I didn’t need a ring to be engaged to him, but since I have one, I wanted it to be something I absolutely loved.
I talked to FH about it, and he said bottom line he wanted me to be happy. He was not sentimental in his purchase, or attached to the ring. So we changed it (I paid for the new setting, as it was my decision to change it).
Post # 13
hmm… I went with maybe. FI told me that he wouldn’t mind if I wanted to “upgrade” my setting at some point (he is against upgrading center stones but not against upgrading settings… kind of funny). So I guess he maybe wouldn’t care. Except that the only type of setting I’d prefer to my current setting would probably be the same cost or cheaper so its not really an upgrade heh. I love love love my ering but if I had picked it out all by myself the band would be a little thinner than it is. It is such a minor thing though I think the sentimentality of him having picked it far outweighs it not being EXACTLY what I had in my mind. But if I really didn’t like the setting and he didn’t mind, I would change it.
Post # 14
I had my ring custom made in platinum because I never want to change my engagement ring. My grandmother still has her original and I love that. The only think though is that FI picked the side stones by himself so that I wouldn’t know when the process had been done and they are not the best quality. Since I have a perfect center stone it makes their imperfections stand out more. I love my ring by FI does want to upgrade the side stones to better quality stones in the future.
Post # 15
Okay, I’ll go. I have a 6-prong solitaire like @gabrielleelise1981. While I am guilty for picking it out originally, I’ve actually changed my mind since it is set so high and gets in the way/bangs around a lot. While I did pick it out, I did not get to see it being set, so didn’t realize how high it would end up. It actually scares me sometimes how much it bangs into things and i”m not even a clumsy person.
Because of this I do want to ‘downgrade’ to a 4 prong solitaire setting exactly like my current setting but with the diamond set much lower. I want DH to be involved because I want him to give input, I want him to like it.
Post # 16
@moderndaisy: I think you should talk to your FH about it – it’s a very practical issue you have – not a “I want a bigger diamond than you bought” issue. I don’t believe changing the setting for a practical purpose would hurt his feelings, especially since you are keeping the diamond and the same basic design. You are still using, and loving, the diamond he picked.
Good luck 🙂