Post # 1
Hi Bees! So the consensus in my family is that a missing RSVP is a “No”, that I don’t need to follow up. If they show up, tough for them because they won’t have a seat. However that does NOT seem to be the consensus here! I was wondering if you ladies would weigh in?
Post # 3
@bourkelton: I’ll be following up. There are too many people who just assume I know their answer.
Post # 4
@bourkelton: If you choose not to follow up, you or someone close to you is going to be scrambling at the last minute to find seating, food and drink for people who just show up.
As much as you say there will be no seat for them, the reality is you can’t just ignore them until they go away, becasue they won’t.
Post # 5
@bourkelton: I’m planning to followup (although I guess that may depend on just how MANY I have track down). I’d like to be able to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they sent it back, but it got lost in the mail. I’d hate for someone to show up and not have a seat if that did actually happen.
Post # 6
@nadnuk: @julies1949: @Soon2BeMrsS: I feel the same way. I would feel very stressed and guilty if someone I wasn’t prepared for showed up… my reception is on the third floor of a brewery and my mom was under the impression it’s a bar. She was telling people to “stop by” !!!! WHAT?!
Post # 7
I followed up on those that I didn’t hear from. I’d say 2/3s turned out to be nos and 1/3 turned out to be a “oh yes, we’re coming! I meant to send in that RSVP!” After a couple attempts there were still a few people we didn’t get an answer from and we assumed no and were correct.
I thought it was easier to at least try to get a response from everyone rather than scrambling at the last minute. Because as much as you can say “tough for them” most people wouldn’t turn them away and then, what, they stand around in the corner while everyone eats? I might say that in theory, but I wouldn’t have the heart to do that for real, so it wouldn’t be an option for me.
Post # 8
@JenGirl: Thanks for your input! It’s great to hear from a wedding veteran (wederan?). I think it will be tempting when I’m grumpy about all the missing ones to say WELL SUCKS TO BE THEM BLAH BLAH BLAH but I totally agree, I will feel horrible about it lol.
Post # 9
@bourkelton: Yeah – chasing them down kinda sucks. But I made my husband do most of that! You can growl at them to your fiance before calling and kindly asking if they’re coming!
Post # 10
No way would I have wanted some unknown RSVP’s showing up to my wedding and having no place to sit, etc… I absolutely followed up.
Post # 11
I would follow up. We had someone who told us they mailed it back but it never arrived. I would have felt terrible if we didn’t have a spot for her just because we didn’t follow up.
Post # 12
Yeah, I plan to follow up. But anyone who tries to give me a maybe or a indesive answer I plan to write down as a no, and I will tell them that.
Post # 13
@bourkelton: Follow up. Def follow up.
I think its rude for them to assume that bc they dont rsvp that means no
Post # 14
- Wedding: April 2013 - Valparaiso, IN
I followed up. I didn’t want any surprises. So, I guess my reasoning was a little selfish, but…
Post # 15
We’ve already had one RSVP show up in a bag from the post office. It got shredded in a machine. Luckily our address and the names of the guests survived so we could contact them. Things happen, so we’ll be following up just in case!
Post # 16
i will definitely follow up with invites. what if they just forgot? i wouldn’t want to insult someone like that