Did/would you keep your opposite sex friends when you got married?

posted 2 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Did/would you keep your opposite sex friends when you got married?
    Of course! Friends are friends. : (122 votes)
    92 %
    No, I dropped them. : (10 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    3301 posts
    Sugar bee

    Of course. Men and women aren’t teo different species. It’s possible to have a platonic friendship with a man. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    5685 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Of course. Why wouldn’t i?

    Post # 4
    Member
    3640 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Yes. Of course. No reason not to

    Post # 5
    Member
    4483 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Absolutely, and FI will too.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2052 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I would, it’s not like getting married means you can’t ever converse with the opposite sex if it isn’t your husband.

    And frankly if my FI was expecting me to get rid of my male friends that would throw up a huge red flag to me.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1748 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Of course.. I mean, just like when I was ”just” in a relationship, I respect my husband – I wouldn’t go out for cocktails for 5 hours with 1 single male friend, because it would feel a bit disrespectful towards my husband, but hanging out casually, the odd phone-call/text message.. all that’s totally fine… marriage isn’t a prison 😀

    Post # 8
    Member
    6416 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Of course I did. Why are you considering ‘dropping them’?

    Post # 10
    Member
    12779 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    What reason would there be to NOT continue to be friends…??

    The relationship would most likey change since I have different prioirities and running and working on a home/house take a LOT of time so I wont see them as much, especially if they are/get married too, but I woudl certainly keep in touch and chat.  I have a few single male friends and I have no problem going out shopping/dinner with them all day since my husband does not like to shop.

    Post # 11
    Member
    353 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2015 - The Fairmont, SF

    Truth be told, yes and no.

    I have several male friends who, in all honesty, mean the world to me. I love them to pieces and if any of them ever needed me, I’d be there for them. At the same time, whenever I’ve been in a relatinship or they’ve been in a relationship, we’ve instinctively pulled slightly away from each other.

    Why? Because we know our bond won’t change but we believe the most important thing we can do as friends is to respect one another’s partners. I’ll text my bestie on his birthday and on holidays but will I send him Snapchats all day and write “I MISS YOUUUU” on his FB all the time like I did when I was single? Not a chance. I believe that even platonic friendships should have boundaries.

    So, in short, our friendships will continue but they’ve changed already and we all accept that.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1111 posts
    Bumble bee

    Of course I’m keeping my friends and I will talk to male colleagues and male strangers. If my fiancé didn’t trust me enough to be able to be friends with men I would not be marrying him. If he did not respect me enough to understand that he has no rights, say or control over who I am friends with and what I choose to do with my time I would not be marrying him. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    2059 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    Yes, of course! That said, I would be careful about spending time alone with them just due to appropriateness and making my FI uncomfortable, but we trust each other, he would never tell me to drop them and I would never tell him too. If he told me to stop being friends we probably wouldn’t be together. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    7243 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Why would you drop a friend? Doesn’t sound like you are much of a friend if you can so easily drop one!

    And if my SO asked me to well then I would have to either suggest my SO go to therapy to work on their control and/or insecurity issues and if they refused I would probably reconsider if they were the right person for me.

    Post # 15
    Member
    655 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB

    I don’t understand why dropping them would even be an option? I don’t get it.

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